ouran. introspection (ootori kyouya)
title. Introspection
fandom. Ouran Koukou Host Club
characters. Ootori Kyouya
pairings. None, really. But if you squint you can see slight Kyouya/Tamaki plus the future implication of Kyouya/Tamaki/Haruhi (YAYOT3)
rating. G
summary. There are many 'What if's in life. This is Kyouya's and his thoughts on them.
Every once in awhile Kyouya found his attention--which was always, always focused on work--drifting towards Haruhi. The girl was either busy with customers or being bothered by Tamaki or the twins. And he knew the reason for his short-time focus on Haruhi.
It was because she intrigued him, not because he had an interest in her (at least, not in the sense that Tamaki had for her). His interest in her was only for her behaviour to the other hosts and the customers. Nothing more, nothing less.
Haruhi was, after all, just a commoner; he would gain no merit or profit by being with or showing interest in her. She had said something about that before, hadn't she? How he would gain nothing from sleeping or molesting her (and in his own defense, Kyouya had only acted as the bad guy for Tamaki's sake). And this was a fact that he continued to believe in.
But the fact was not strong enough to stop a 'what if' to enter the vice-president's head.
What if he was to ever fall for Haruhi?
Just the thought caused an amused smirk to twitch the sides of his lips.
If he was ever to fall for the girl then he would have to take into consideration many, many things and not jump head first into such a thing as pursuing someone like Haruhi.
But as high as a consideration of Haruhi's commoner status was, Tamaki and his feelings was the one thing he took into the upmost thought and care.
To Kyouya, the eccentric blond was one of the most important people in his life. Tamaki was the only person he really, truly, trusted. Tamaki was the only person to have ever seen Kyouya's true self. Tamaki was his best friend and Kyouya could never hurt his best friend.
Because hurting Tamaki was the last thing he would ever think of doing, and falling for Haruhi would do such a thing. It would be considered backstabbing, if such a thing happened, and he so chose to pursue after Haruhi.
It would mean destroying everything he ever had with Tamaki and, inevitably, the crumbling of the Host Club.
Kyouya was not enough of a bastard to let such a thing happen. He had feelings. He knew consequences. Kyouya always thought about these things before ever rushing into them. Because, unlike Tamaki, Kyouya thought that rushing into things would only cause harm. Thinking everything through and drawing up endings and conclusions, however, did not. And that was really what made Kyouya himself.
To fall for Haruhi, he concluded, staring down at the many notes he had written, would mean to throw away everything he had been working so hard on all these years. And to throw everything away for a girl, regardless of feelings, was something he would not do.
To fall for Haruhi would mean to hurt--to backstab--his own best friend and only person he ever truly trusted. It meant to severe the bond between them and cause a dangerous falling-out. Kyouya could not--would not--let that happen; he cared far too much, far too deeply, for Tamaki to ever do such a thing.
To fall for Haruhi meant, in the end, gaining nothing but a common feeling and losing everything of importance.
No.
With a tiny smile and snap of the notebook Kyouya glanced towards Tamaki, their eyes catching for just a quick second and the blond offered him a smile, and Kyouya understood.
If he was to ever fall for Haruhi then Tamaki would have to there as well.
Without Tamaki there was nothing.
fandom. Ouran Koukou Host Club
characters. Ootori Kyouya
pairings. None, really. But if you squint you can see slight Kyouya/Tamaki plus the future implication of Kyouya/Tamaki/Haruhi (YAYOT3)
rating. G
summary. There are many 'What if's in life. This is Kyouya's and his thoughts on them.
Every once in awhile Kyouya found his attention--which was always, always focused on work--drifting towards Haruhi. The girl was either busy with customers or being bothered by Tamaki or the twins. And he knew the reason for his short-time focus on Haruhi.
It was because she intrigued him, not because he had an interest in her (at least, not in the sense that Tamaki had for her). His interest in her was only for her behaviour to the other hosts and the customers. Nothing more, nothing less.
Haruhi was, after all, just a commoner; he would gain no merit or profit by being with or showing interest in her. She had said something about that before, hadn't she? How he would gain nothing from sleeping or molesting her (and in his own defense, Kyouya had only acted as the bad guy for Tamaki's sake). And this was a fact that he continued to believe in.
But the fact was not strong enough to stop a 'what if' to enter the vice-president's head.
What if he was to ever fall for Haruhi?
Just the thought caused an amused smirk to twitch the sides of his lips.
If he was ever to fall for the girl then he would have to take into consideration many, many things and not jump head first into such a thing as pursuing someone like Haruhi.
But as high as a consideration of Haruhi's commoner status was, Tamaki and his feelings was the one thing he took into the upmost thought and care.
To Kyouya, the eccentric blond was one of the most important people in his life. Tamaki was the only person he really, truly, trusted. Tamaki was the only person to have ever seen Kyouya's true self. Tamaki was his best friend and Kyouya could never hurt his best friend.
Because hurting Tamaki was the last thing he would ever think of doing, and falling for Haruhi would do such a thing. It would be considered backstabbing, if such a thing happened, and he so chose to pursue after Haruhi.
It would mean destroying everything he ever had with Tamaki and, inevitably, the crumbling of the Host Club.
Kyouya was not enough of a bastard to let such a thing happen. He had feelings. He knew consequences. Kyouya always thought about these things before ever rushing into them. Because, unlike Tamaki, Kyouya thought that rushing into things would only cause harm. Thinking everything through and drawing up endings and conclusions, however, did not. And that was really what made Kyouya himself.
To fall for Haruhi, he concluded, staring down at the many notes he had written, would mean to throw away everything he had been working so hard on all these years. And to throw everything away for a girl, regardless of feelings, was something he would not do.
To fall for Haruhi would mean to hurt--to backstab--his own best friend and only person he ever truly trusted. It meant to severe the bond between them and cause a dangerous falling-out. Kyouya could not--would not--let that happen; he cared far too much, far too deeply, for Tamaki to ever do such a thing.
To fall for Haruhi meant, in the end, gaining nothing but a common feeling and losing everything of importance.
No.
With a tiny smile and snap of the notebook Kyouya glanced towards Tamaki, their eyes catching for just a quick second and the blond offered him a smile, and Kyouya understood.
If he was to ever fall for Haruhi then Tamaki would have to there as well.
Without Tamaki there was nothing.