Oct 16, 2005 23:32
I came back to my room and see the travel scrabble game on the foot of the bed. Where I threw it as we walked back to my room after she finished a cordorouy case for my zen sleek. The weekend was packed. She got here on Friday around 4:30 and rolled her orange designer looking suitcase into my bedroom and rested it against the wall. We were definitely happy to see each other. We rolled out to Bloomfield Hills to the Maple Art theater which we have not been to before. It was packed. We saw Everything Is Illuminated, which had some very funny moments and loveable characters. More prominent was its serious nature of searching and looking back through our pasts. "Everything is illuminated in the light of our pasts." We spent the rest of the night watching collateral and going to the gheto in and out store by my house for nasty gangster beer punch. The most fun thing we did though was have a squirt gun fight outside in the yard. We tried to hide behind trees and the shed. We got drenched and I can still see the smile on her face.
Saturday, we rolled around and wasted time in bed like we always do. It seemed to take us forever after getting up and eating our bowls of cereal to get dressed and ready for our excursion. We started at Target where I made use of my discounts searching for new red and khaki clothing. Then we picked up some bookshelves. I don't know how she can make shopping at target so fun. When we finally made it out of there we headed to Royal Oak. Mongolian Barbeque had been on our minds for awhile now and we finally decided to go. I can't pack away the bowls like I used to be able to. We then went to Barnes and Noble to wait for a movie to start down the street and to pick up some bookends. I'm glad I went with the meditative frogs. They were her idea. We moved on to the Main Art Theater to see Thumbsucker, which was amazing. It was just an amazing movie and so true to the struggles of life. I loved it.
I could sense something was bothering her and it opened up a very important conversation about feelings of inadequacy that we both experienced in light of each other. What started out as disapointment I think transformed into deeper understanding and appreciation. We came home and tried to work on the bookshelves, but I think we needed to start fresh. So we laid in bed and watched a bit of Life Aquatic. We were starting to nod off, so we cuddled up and let go.
Today the time slipped away. She made omelettes while I finished the shelves. I'm fortunate she has taken an interest into football because we watched the Lions lose it in the last seconds as I predicted. Part of the time we were watching it I felt maybe we were wasting our time, but it seemed alright. We even through the ball around as the great fall cold slowed us down a bit. I taught her Epoche somewhere before the fourth quarter so she could try to approach her problems fresh and I think she appreciated it. After the game we ordered a pizza , played scrabble, and watched Crash. The last couple hours approached and we were getting sad. I didn't know what to do, we anxiously clung to each other as if it was the last time we'd see each other. Then we got up and danced, sat and talked about different scenarious and possibilities, talked about hopes and danced some more. We couldn't let each other go, but it finally came to be that time. I helped her fill the tires as she talked about kidnapping me, then I watched her pull away. Kissing her in the driveway before she left, I closed my eyes and I could have sworn for a minute we were back at my parents house, kissing in the driveway there just before or after returning from the lake. Life is so hard to get used to. I hope we'll be okay.