Baby talk
So the N00b has been out for almost three weeks now, and we're really lucky that so far things are pretty straightforward (touches wood). All she does is eat, sleep, poop, laugh and vomit hilarious quantities of boob-milk onto her grandparents. I was very amused to discover that Hollywood had not exaggerated the range or comedic potential of baby-vom. It really does travel that far, splatter that violently and demonstrates the fact that in addition to a clutching reflex and a swallowing reflex, all babies are born with an inherent sense of comic timing.
I'm also extremely grateful that thanks either to genetics or environment or some random good luck in the baby lottery, Francesca doesn't yet cry. In fact we've discovered that so long as we avoid the indignity of getting her cold, wet and naked at the same time she pretty much does not give a damn, and won't go to the effort of yelling and screaming for anything. Paediatricians can stab her with needles and canulae, place her on grueling regimes of antibiotics and carry her away from her parents for hours at a time. This is apparently not even worthy of comment. However, anyone removing her from a nice warm bath or stripping her off in a chilly public changing facility to assault her with a piece of damp cotton-wool had better be wearing ear defenders, because that is apparently where the line is crossed, and she makes up for lost time with ear-splitting volume.
Still, as long as we avoid that indignity, she is blissfully silent throughout social events, loud operas and films in which helicopters explode, making her really quite easy to get along with, which is nice.
I'm also extremely grateful that thanks either to genetics or environment or some random good luck in the baby lottery, Francesca doesn't yet cry. In fact we've discovered that so long as we avoid the indignity of getting her cold, wet and naked at the same time she pretty much does not give a damn, and won't go to the effort of yelling and screaming for anything. Paediatricians can stab her with needles and canulae, place her on grueling regimes of antibiotics and carry her away from her parents for hours at a time. This is apparently not even worthy of comment. However, anyone removing her from a nice warm bath or stripping her off in a chilly public changing facility to assault her with a piece of damp cotton-wool had better be wearing ear defenders, because that is apparently where the line is crossed, and she makes up for lost time with ear-splitting volume.
Still, as long as we avoid that indignity, she is blissfully silent throughout social events, loud operas and films in which helicopters explode, making her really quite easy to get along with, which is nice.