Insecurity - Ch 5
Title: Insecurity
Pairing: Ryoda, one-sided Junda
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I don’t own any of these pretty Japanese boys
Dedicated to xlolitsnozomix because she showed me HAWT junno!! (:
Summary: When Ryo and Ueda fight once again, Ueda gets comfort from one of his closest friends. But can Ryo face the fear that he might be losing his love to another man?
A/N: SORRY IM SO LATE ): i haven't gotten inspiration for this in FOREVER! XD
[Ch 1] [Ch 2] [Ch 3] [Ch 4]
Chapter 5
Two weeks.
Two weeks of going through daily motions. Of going through the same thing over and over. Everything just seemed like a blur for the brown-haired man.
It seemed like it had been an eternity since he had kissed Ueda.
He sighed, burying his head into his lap.
Everything was going wrong. Like the world was spinning out of control. And it seemed like everything he did, just made it worse.
He let out a shaky breath that he hadn’t known he was holding and he looked upward at the ceiling of their practice room.
He had called Ueda of course. In fact, he had called him the first day after their “date.”
Not surprisingly, no one picked up. He had stood there with the phone ringing in his hand till the answering machine went on.
Even though he had tried calling the princess, he hadn’t worked up the courage to visit him. He was scared that Ueda would be there, yet wouldn’t open the door. Or worse, Ueda would open the door, see it was him, and slam it on him.
“Ahh~ that was a nice break,” he heard Jin’s refreshed voice and he heard Kame’s low murmur of agreement.
There was a sound of footsteps and another voice floated through the air, “Koki, we should come up with a new skit in time for the new Cartoon Kat-tun…wouldn’t that be fun?”
Koki’s low guttural laugh filled the air, “Yea, later, k?”
And then they were filling into the practice room, talking and chatting and acting like there was nothing wrong in the world.
But, mused Junno grimly, there was something dreadfully wrong with the world.
For exactly at the moment, the princess had walked in and had cast a nonchalant, non-caring look at him. And it made his heart plummet.
When Ueda looked away, Koki and Maru had sat on either side of him. He blinked confusedly; “What?”
Koki let out a sound of concern and caught Maru’s eye. Junno had been worrying them lately; his jokes were lamer than ever and Ueda hadn’t been laughing at them…at all.
And with the lack of Ueda’s laugh, Junno’s jokes had started dying down and now, the Joker hardly made any jokes anymore and it worried the TaNaka pair more than anything.
“Junno, are you eating okay?” started Maru concernedly, like it was in his nature, and he placed a hand on the Joker’s shoulder.
Junno blinked at them twice before finally turning to look Maru in the eye with a confused look, “What are you two up to?”
Of course they should have known Junno would have caught on, but at least they tried; Koki spoke, “Well, Junno, we just noticed you’ve been uh…”
He paused, searching for a word when Maru cut in, “Depressed. We were wondering if something was wrong?”
The two were shocked to see Junno’s face crumble and then harden a second afterward, “No, no, nothing’s wrong,” his lower lip trembled and the duo could obviously tell something was wrong but he refused to acknowledge them, turning away and facing straight-forward.
Koki caught Maru’s eyes once again and at Maru’s nod, the two turned to get up and leave Junno alone. Junno was in a shell now and neither of the two could do anything to help him. Maru glanced at Ueda and he frowned; only one person could help the Joker now…
Ueda angrily threw his bag onto his bed, his face telling of conflicted emotions. He didn’t know what was going on anymore, and he didn’t know how to even talk let alone, look at Junno without a ache in his heart happening. It wasn’t as if he was angry at the man for kissing him, but it certainly didn’t help their friendship by him doing that.
He sighed, collapsing onto the bed.
Junno…was special to him. He knew that.
But so was Ryo.
So why was it that he found he had…feelings for the Joker?
Junno was always sweet and nice and well, always there for him when Ryo wasn’t and now he was slowly staring to realize the difference between the two.
But, he didn’t want to cheat on Ryo; he loved Ryo! But, his heart was feeling differently and for this whole two weeks, he had been trying to not look at Junno to try and stop those feelings.
It wasn’t working though; he knew it wasn’t going to work. Without Junno, his life felt empty and well, he felt like he had a hole where his heart was.
But, Ryo…
He sighed, clutched the bed sheets, and eventually cried himself to sleep.
NEWS - minus Ryo - all glanced at each other nervously. They didn’t know what was wrong with him, but for two weeks now, they were scared to get on his bad side. He had been blowing off at everyone and everything.
At least Tegoshi never had to go through the treatment and knowing this, Pi, with a nervous look, urged the youth to go ask Ryo what was wrong.
Tegoshi pouted and begged because he didn’t want to know what was wrong with Ryo, but Pi just shook his head (along with the other members) and soon Tegoshi was nervously approaching Ryo.
“So…” he started awkwardly, and he flinched when Ryo looked up at him with a hard glare.
Immediately, Ryo softened up and he sighed, “Sorry, Tegoshi. What’s the matter?”
Tegoshi smiled brightly at Ryo’s change in attitude and he chattered happily away, “Well, we were wondering what was wrong. You seemed so angry and depressed so we weren’t sure what had happened.” He paused here, thinking, and then something seemed to hit him and he cocked his head, “Could it have to do with Ueda? I haven’t heard you say anything about him lately.”
Ryo immediately froze and oblivious Tegoshi chattered on, “Didn’t you have a fight with him a while ago? Didn’t you make up yet? Jeez,” chided Tegoshi and his eyes alight on the frozen Ryo and he sighed, “it’s been a long time now! You love Ueda, don’t you!?”
Ryo just stood, sighed, glanced at Tegoshi, and then smiled bitterly. “Even if I did apologize, it would have done no good,” and he fled, because he couldn’t yell at Tegoshi without feeling guilty.
Tegoshi just cocked his head with a confused expression, “But he could have at least apologized to Ueda-chan…”
Shige sighed and patted the youth on the head, “it’s okay, Tegoshi. You tried. Koyama and I will go do the rest.”
Ryo had fled to anywhere; he had just let his feet do the running. He was scared to say the least to do anything else.
He was losing Ueda. He knew that. Whenever he had called the princess, the other had refused to pick up. And sometimes, he would just go and wait outside the man’s apartment and wait and wait and hope for the other man to just walk outside…but it was all a vain hope. Because he knew even if he appeared in front of Ueda, it’ll do no good. Because the other man didn’t love him anymore; even though now, Ryo knew he loved the princess.
He felt warm arms wrap around him and he blinked as he turned to look at the one who was holding him. Shige.
“Shige?” he asked gruffly.
“Don’t look so down,” said the university student with a frown, “it doesn’t suit you.”
Koyama’s head popped up behind Shige and he was grinning, “Ryo! We just want to know what’s wrong. We won’t tell the other members.”
He sighed; he sure as hell wouldn’t tell his best friend Yamapi about these feelings let alone this pair! He was just about to tell them when Koyama nervously continued.
“Well…we weren’t going to tell you this,” and he locked eyes with Shige over Ryo’s head before continuing, “but, well, when we went to karoke the other day…”
Shige sighed and continued because Koyama couldn’t do it, “We saw Taguchi kissing Ueda.”
Ryo’s eyes took on a murderous intent and Koyama hastily supplied more information, “Don’t worry!” his voice had a squeak. “It wasn’t because the princess wanted it! He wasn’t responding at all to Taguchi!”
Ryo just stiffly nodded and pulled out of Shige’s embrace, “Well, thank you, you two. I’ll be right back.” And he’s gone in less than a minute.
Koyama and Shige turn to look at each other. The result wasn’t that favorable but at least…
“Ryo-chan looked more alive than in two weeks didn’t he?” grinned Koyama and he felt accomplished for being able to help his band mate.
Shige grimly nodded, “Well…we’ll have to see if it’ll all turn out all right in the end.”
------------------------
Whoa…okay, I haven’t wrote this in forever! This was inspired by the awesome xlolitsnozomix so I dedicated it to her! Have you seen her picture of Junno! Psssh, so hot. Anyways, wow, once I got inspiration I started writing so fast! Haha im so sorry that I continued this so late; I mean you guys probably have to reread the whole thing over to get what’s happening! ;_; im such a horrible writer TT_TT I’ll work harder, promise!
Anyways, thanks to anyone who even remembers this story! Hehehe *bows* you people are the reason I keep writing hehe XD
Pairing: Ryoda, one-sided Junda
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I don’t own any of these pretty Japanese boys
Dedicated to xlolitsnozomix because she showed me HAWT junno!! (:
Summary: When Ryo and Ueda fight once again, Ueda gets comfort from one of his closest friends. But can Ryo face the fear that he might be losing his love to another man?
A/N: SORRY IM SO LATE ): i haven't gotten inspiration for this in FOREVER! XD
[Ch 1] [Ch 2] [Ch 3] [Ch 4]
Chapter 5
Two weeks.
Two weeks of going through daily motions. Of going through the same thing over and over. Everything just seemed like a blur for the brown-haired man.
It seemed like it had been an eternity since he had kissed Ueda.
He sighed, burying his head into his lap.
Everything was going wrong. Like the world was spinning out of control. And it seemed like everything he did, just made it worse.
He let out a shaky breath that he hadn’t known he was holding and he looked upward at the ceiling of their practice room.
He had called Ueda of course. In fact, he had called him the first day after their “date.”
Not surprisingly, no one picked up. He had stood there with the phone ringing in his hand till the answering machine went on.
Even though he had tried calling the princess, he hadn’t worked up the courage to visit him. He was scared that Ueda would be there, yet wouldn’t open the door. Or worse, Ueda would open the door, see it was him, and slam it on him.
“Ahh~ that was a nice break,” he heard Jin’s refreshed voice and he heard Kame’s low murmur of agreement.
There was a sound of footsteps and another voice floated through the air, “Koki, we should come up with a new skit in time for the new Cartoon Kat-tun…wouldn’t that be fun?”
Koki’s low guttural laugh filled the air, “Yea, later, k?”
And then they were filling into the practice room, talking and chatting and acting like there was nothing wrong in the world.
But, mused Junno grimly, there was something dreadfully wrong with the world.
For exactly at the moment, the princess had walked in and had cast a nonchalant, non-caring look at him. And it made his heart plummet.
When Ueda looked away, Koki and Maru had sat on either side of him. He blinked confusedly; “What?”
Koki let out a sound of concern and caught Maru’s eye. Junno had been worrying them lately; his jokes were lamer than ever and Ueda hadn’t been laughing at them…at all.
And with the lack of Ueda’s laugh, Junno’s jokes had started dying down and now, the Joker hardly made any jokes anymore and it worried the TaNaka pair more than anything.
“Junno, are you eating okay?” started Maru concernedly, like it was in his nature, and he placed a hand on the Joker’s shoulder.
Junno blinked at them twice before finally turning to look Maru in the eye with a confused look, “What are you two up to?”
Of course they should have known Junno would have caught on, but at least they tried; Koki spoke, “Well, Junno, we just noticed you’ve been uh…”
He paused, searching for a word when Maru cut in, “Depressed. We were wondering if something was wrong?”
The two were shocked to see Junno’s face crumble and then harden a second afterward, “No, no, nothing’s wrong,” his lower lip trembled and the duo could obviously tell something was wrong but he refused to acknowledge them, turning away and facing straight-forward.
Koki caught Maru’s eyes once again and at Maru’s nod, the two turned to get up and leave Junno alone. Junno was in a shell now and neither of the two could do anything to help him. Maru glanced at Ueda and he frowned; only one person could help the Joker now…
Ueda angrily threw his bag onto his bed, his face telling of conflicted emotions. He didn’t know what was going on anymore, and he didn’t know how to even talk let alone, look at Junno without a ache in his heart happening. It wasn’t as if he was angry at the man for kissing him, but it certainly didn’t help their friendship by him doing that.
He sighed, collapsing onto the bed.
Junno…was special to him. He knew that.
But so was Ryo.
So why was it that he found he had…feelings for the Joker?
Junno was always sweet and nice and well, always there for him when Ryo wasn’t and now he was slowly staring to realize the difference between the two.
But, he didn’t want to cheat on Ryo; he loved Ryo! But, his heart was feeling differently and for this whole two weeks, he had been trying to not look at Junno to try and stop those feelings.
It wasn’t working though; he knew it wasn’t going to work. Without Junno, his life felt empty and well, he felt like he had a hole where his heart was.
But, Ryo…
He sighed, clutched the bed sheets, and eventually cried himself to sleep.
NEWS - minus Ryo - all glanced at each other nervously. They didn’t know what was wrong with him, but for two weeks now, they were scared to get on his bad side. He had been blowing off at everyone and everything.
At least Tegoshi never had to go through the treatment and knowing this, Pi, with a nervous look, urged the youth to go ask Ryo what was wrong.
Tegoshi pouted and begged because he didn’t want to know what was wrong with Ryo, but Pi just shook his head (along with the other members) and soon Tegoshi was nervously approaching Ryo.
“So…” he started awkwardly, and he flinched when Ryo looked up at him with a hard glare.
Immediately, Ryo softened up and he sighed, “Sorry, Tegoshi. What’s the matter?”
Tegoshi smiled brightly at Ryo’s change in attitude and he chattered happily away, “Well, we were wondering what was wrong. You seemed so angry and depressed so we weren’t sure what had happened.” He paused here, thinking, and then something seemed to hit him and he cocked his head, “Could it have to do with Ueda? I haven’t heard you say anything about him lately.”
Ryo immediately froze and oblivious Tegoshi chattered on, “Didn’t you have a fight with him a while ago? Didn’t you make up yet? Jeez,” chided Tegoshi and his eyes alight on the frozen Ryo and he sighed, “it’s been a long time now! You love Ueda, don’t you!?”
Ryo just stood, sighed, glanced at Tegoshi, and then smiled bitterly. “Even if I did apologize, it would have done no good,” and he fled, because he couldn’t yell at Tegoshi without feeling guilty.
Tegoshi just cocked his head with a confused expression, “But he could have at least apologized to Ueda-chan…”
Shige sighed and patted the youth on the head, “it’s okay, Tegoshi. You tried. Koyama and I will go do the rest.”
Ryo had fled to anywhere; he had just let his feet do the running. He was scared to say the least to do anything else.
He was losing Ueda. He knew that. Whenever he had called the princess, the other had refused to pick up. And sometimes, he would just go and wait outside the man’s apartment and wait and wait and hope for the other man to just walk outside…but it was all a vain hope. Because he knew even if he appeared in front of Ueda, it’ll do no good. Because the other man didn’t love him anymore; even though now, Ryo knew he loved the princess.
He felt warm arms wrap around him and he blinked as he turned to look at the one who was holding him. Shige.
“Shige?” he asked gruffly.
“Don’t look so down,” said the university student with a frown, “it doesn’t suit you.”
Koyama’s head popped up behind Shige and he was grinning, “Ryo! We just want to know what’s wrong. We won’t tell the other members.”
He sighed; he sure as hell wouldn’t tell his best friend Yamapi about these feelings let alone this pair! He was just about to tell them when Koyama nervously continued.
“Well…we weren’t going to tell you this,” and he locked eyes with Shige over Ryo’s head before continuing, “but, well, when we went to karoke the other day…”
Shige sighed and continued because Koyama couldn’t do it, “We saw Taguchi kissing Ueda.”
Ryo’s eyes took on a murderous intent and Koyama hastily supplied more information, “Don’t worry!” his voice had a squeak. “It wasn’t because the princess wanted it! He wasn’t responding at all to Taguchi!”
Ryo just stiffly nodded and pulled out of Shige’s embrace, “Well, thank you, you two. I’ll be right back.” And he’s gone in less than a minute.
Koyama and Shige turn to look at each other. The result wasn’t that favorable but at least…
“Ryo-chan looked more alive than in two weeks didn’t he?” grinned Koyama and he felt accomplished for being able to help his band mate.
Shige grimly nodded, “Well…we’ll have to see if it’ll all turn out all right in the end.”
------------------------
Whoa…okay, I haven’t wrote this in forever! This was inspired by the awesome xlolitsnozomix so I dedicated it to her! Have you seen her picture of Junno! Psssh, so hot. Anyways, wow, once I got inspiration I started writing so fast! Haha im so sorry that I continued this so late; I mean you guys probably have to reread the whole thing over to get what’s happening! ;_; im such a horrible writer TT_TT I’ll work harder, promise!
Anyways, thanks to anyone who even remembers this story! Hehehe *bows* you people are the reason I keep writing hehe XD