(no subject)
so it's my last day in vicosa and second to last in brazil. i've been here for the past 8 months and what is there to say? i don't want to go back. i want to stay for another 6 months. why? i like it here a lot more that in the states. i don't know why i do, but i guess it's hard to explain unless you've traveled a bit. actually it is hard to explain unless you have traveled to more than one other country and not one like canada or mexico. i've realized all of the problems that we have in the states from being here, and there are soo many. like why is money such a huge part of our culture? you can be extremely happy in life and not have a lot of money, but that's not the american way. it's amazing to see how united the people are here, and how unbelievably friendly they are to you. they go soo far out of their way to help you and make sure that you don't get a bad image of their country. i can't say that many people back home do the same. like when someone from another country is speaking english many americans will shut down completely so that they can't understand what the other person is saying. very few people here do that.
i know that when i go back everyone is going to say that i have changed soo much, but have i really? or have they? i can't really answer this since i've been absent from everyone's lives for a while that i don't know about anything that has happened to them since before i left. is it soo bad to be in this bubble of bliss? crazy adventures, parties, lots of dancing, beautiful girls, good food, good beer, cachaca, good wine, amazing area...are these things so bad? is it odd that i feel closer to my friends here than i do with many of my friends back home? should i feel bad that i am or that i really didn't feel too bad about leaving the states for 8 months but i know that i will be very depressed and sad to leave brazil behind? should i be so happy to be going home to forget all of the good things here and all of my friends here? i think not no matter how much people say i am stupid for missing it so much. will anything truly be as fun or great back home in comparison with my wild antics here? will i be so different that the people i know would rather no be near me?
these are all of the things running through my mind now, and i can't really answer any of it besides i will miss brazil a lot. quite possibly more than i've missed home in the past 8 months. i do feel closer to my friends here than i think i have felt with most people i have know in the states. i don't know what people will think of me when i come back, nor does their opinion hold any sway really for me. if you can't accept me for who i am now then oh well. i'm not going to change for you or anyone. i truly know what being self dependant is like, going to a somewhere that you know very little about and meeting people and live there like anyone else, traveling alone to big cities, navigating huge cities to get to where you need to go, getting the things i need by hagaling for the price, and the knowledge that i can go anywhere in this country and be alright. i don't know anyone there that can say that they can do that. that they can pick up everything and move to somewhere else without remorse and miss their new home more than their first. tis life and one's journeys through it that make you who you are.
quando vou voltar pra brasil....espero que no dezembro. quantas pessoas me preguntavam porque voce precisa voltar pra la? fica aqui pra mais tempo. se voce deve voltar quando voce vai voltar pra brasil? ninguem sabe tanto dificil e pra repostar a essas preguntas a pessoas que voce gosta de mais. agora quando eles me pregunta estou lutando pra nao chorar e abracar eles. espero que meu voo e cancelado e posso ficar aqui pra mais uma semana, mas sei que isso nao vai acontecer. nao quero falar tchau foi um grande prazer conhecendo voce e essa tipo de coisa. porque essa palvras nao tem o significado eu quero que elas tem.
i know that when i go back everyone is going to say that i have changed soo much, but have i really? or have they? i can't really answer this since i've been absent from everyone's lives for a while that i don't know about anything that has happened to them since before i left. is it soo bad to be in this bubble of bliss? crazy adventures, parties, lots of dancing, beautiful girls, good food, good beer, cachaca, good wine, amazing area...are these things so bad? is it odd that i feel closer to my friends here than i do with many of my friends back home? should i feel bad that i am or that i really didn't feel too bad about leaving the states for 8 months but i know that i will be very depressed and sad to leave brazil behind? should i be so happy to be going home to forget all of the good things here and all of my friends here? i think not no matter how much people say i am stupid for missing it so much. will anything truly be as fun or great back home in comparison with my wild antics here? will i be so different that the people i know would rather no be near me?
these are all of the things running through my mind now, and i can't really answer any of it besides i will miss brazil a lot. quite possibly more than i've missed home in the past 8 months. i do feel closer to my friends here than i think i have felt with most people i have know in the states. i don't know what people will think of me when i come back, nor does their opinion hold any sway really for me. if you can't accept me for who i am now then oh well. i'm not going to change for you or anyone. i truly know what being self dependant is like, going to a somewhere that you know very little about and meeting people and live there like anyone else, traveling alone to big cities, navigating huge cities to get to where you need to go, getting the things i need by hagaling for the price, and the knowledge that i can go anywhere in this country and be alright. i don't know anyone there that can say that they can do that. that they can pick up everything and move to somewhere else without remorse and miss their new home more than their first. tis life and one's journeys through it that make you who you are.
quando vou voltar pra brasil....espero que no dezembro. quantas pessoas me preguntavam porque voce precisa voltar pra la? fica aqui pra mais tempo. se voce deve voltar quando voce vai voltar pra brasil? ninguem sabe tanto dificil e pra repostar a essas preguntas a pessoas que voce gosta de mais. agora quando eles me pregunta estou lutando pra nao chorar e abracar eles. espero que meu voo e cancelado e posso ficar aqui pra mais uma semana, mas sei que isso nao vai acontecer. nao quero falar tchau foi um grande prazer conhecendo voce e essa tipo de coisa. porque essa palvras nao tem o significado eu quero que elas tem.