We Are Humming Birds Who've Lost The Plot And Will Not Move.
Yes, I am tipsy... but I never fucking write in this thing when I am in a good mood or happy or whatnot... so what better time than now.. when I am in a good mood... even if it is because I'm tipsy hehe.
I've been thinking a lot lately... not really because I want to.. more so because I have waaay too much time on my hands out here in the brook... but I think I know exactly what I want out of a relationship right now... and of course it is completely illogical and crazy. Basically, in the simplest of terms... I want Jeff... but in an open relationship. So basically, I want a man I truly love and care about who is my best friend and my confidant.... who I have way too much fun with... and he will be mine... BUT... we are COMPLETELY honest with each other and if the mood takes us we can fuck around. So he can bone whomever he likes... as long as he wears a condom and is honest about it. That way... neither of us feel trapped or stressed in anyway... and there is never any need to lie. No bullshit.
Crazy. I know. And the reason I use Jeff as the prime example is... because quite frankly... I still love him. That has never really changed. And I'm sure he really loves Julie... that's fine too. This is some Vicky Christina Barcelona shit... I know he loves her.. but I know he loves me too. And that's ok. It IS possible to love two people. And I'm sure for very different reasons. But just like that silly Woody Allen movie... I see no reason why we can't all exist simultaneously. And of course... Jeff is a good example for my crazy hypothesis... well for starters... because it is ALL only in theory... but also because he is not perfect for me right now... and things aren't meshing up where us dating again would even be the slightest possibility. And besides that he is a prime example because... I still really love him... and I would much rather have him in my life as my love and confidant... who happens to sleep around... than nothing at all. To me... logically that sounds appealing.
And I KNOW him and I know even though he is probably very happy and probably madly in love with her... he still wants to fuck around and not feel restricted... and he, like any other male subject in this hypothetical relationship... should be able to go forth and do so if he so feels... as long as the honesty is there... and the true friendship is there. Like I said... craziness. But I want this so badly right now. This scenario... undeniably with my Jeff Baggage attached... makes sense. I am just so fucking sick of sleeping around and hoping I meet someone with a fucking personality. And I am so sick of everyone being so fucking serious about life and love and everything else... why can't we bend the rules and fucking stereotypes?? Why must everything remain black and white? I don't believe in marriage... so why should I believe in generalizations and stereotypical relationships?? I want to love and be loved.... without fear and without doubt... and that is possible in an open relationship.
So yeah. The drunken ramblings of a clearly confused woman. I hate using Jeff as an example.. because that feels like I'm going a step backwards... but I do miss him.. And it makes sense in this scenario. So suck it. haha.
Relationship Issues: Solved!!
Next: Solving World Hunger. Boom!
I've been thinking a lot lately... not really because I want to.. more so because I have waaay too much time on my hands out here in the brook... but I think I know exactly what I want out of a relationship right now... and of course it is completely illogical and crazy. Basically, in the simplest of terms... I want Jeff... but in an open relationship. So basically, I want a man I truly love and care about who is my best friend and my confidant.... who I have way too much fun with... and he will be mine... BUT... we are COMPLETELY honest with each other and if the mood takes us we can fuck around. So he can bone whomever he likes... as long as he wears a condom and is honest about it. That way... neither of us feel trapped or stressed in anyway... and there is never any need to lie. No bullshit.
Crazy. I know. And the reason I use Jeff as the prime example is... because quite frankly... I still love him. That has never really changed. And I'm sure he really loves Julie... that's fine too. This is some Vicky Christina Barcelona shit... I know he loves her.. but I know he loves me too. And that's ok. It IS possible to love two people. And I'm sure for very different reasons. But just like that silly Woody Allen movie... I see no reason why we can't all exist simultaneously. And of course... Jeff is a good example for my crazy hypothesis... well for starters... because it is ALL only in theory... but also because he is not perfect for me right now... and things aren't meshing up where us dating again would even be the slightest possibility. And besides that he is a prime example because... I still really love him... and I would much rather have him in my life as my love and confidant... who happens to sleep around... than nothing at all. To me... logically that sounds appealing.
And I KNOW him and I know even though he is probably very happy and probably madly in love with her... he still wants to fuck around and not feel restricted... and he, like any other male subject in this hypothetical relationship... should be able to go forth and do so if he so feels... as long as the honesty is there... and the true friendship is there. Like I said... craziness. But I want this so badly right now. This scenario... undeniably with my Jeff Baggage attached... makes sense. I am just so fucking sick of sleeping around and hoping I meet someone with a fucking personality. And I am so sick of everyone being so fucking serious about life and love and everything else... why can't we bend the rules and fucking stereotypes?? Why must everything remain black and white? I don't believe in marriage... so why should I believe in generalizations and stereotypical relationships?? I want to love and be loved.... without fear and without doubt... and that is possible in an open relationship.
So yeah. The drunken ramblings of a clearly confused woman. I hate using Jeff as an example.. because that feels like I'm going a step backwards... but I do miss him.. And it makes sense in this scenario. So suck it. haha.
Relationship Issues: Solved!!
Next: Solving World Hunger. Boom!