He gave me wings, and made me fly.....
In 10 days, I see him.... And I miss him so much. It has been three months, and I can't explain the way I feel when he isn't around me. I realize now what I always took for granted. The way he kissed me, hugged me, and even the cute way he always laughed at me. I just took for granted his love, my love for him, and our life together. I didn't realize what I had.
And one day, he decided to tell me that he needed to go.. That he loved me, but he needed to be "there". He reminded me of how 3 years ago, and still in high school, I promissed him that I would go "there" with him. That I would move my life to be with him. And yet, three and a half years later, I am here, and he has moved "there".
It hurts to roll over at night, and feel nothing but cold sheets, with nothing occupying the space in between. It kills me to be able to accomplish something, and have to tell him over the phone, not being able to have those well deserved hugs, or those "great job babe" kisses. While all this stuff sounds so sappy, and cliche', I can't help but feel it everyday.
However, when Jon left, he said I needed time to become stronger, and self reliant. He said I would become independant, and I would have more time for my friends, which I neglected to think about.
I thought I was over. The week before he left, I remember collapsing on Josie's floor, and I lost it. I kept saying "I don't know what I'm gonna do!, What am I gonna do?" And she hugged me.... She was there.... IN fact, I can't say that I have too many friends.. I have a few that I talk to on a regular basis, and see on a fairly regular basis. And I thank God everyday for the people he has brought into my life.... But I have an outstanding appreciation for the people who are in my life. And I try to tell them more often. It's something I try not to take for granted anymore.
I dont know what is to come.. And I can't say who I will be with in the future, or who I may see and speak to. But I can say that I will give Jon the chance that he gave me. I will be "there" with him... If it doesn't work out, it doesn't. But I have learned that I CAN accomplish things, and I don't need people or trophys to help me get there.
I have found myself, I think....
And I gotta say, it feels good.
*Sigh*
And one day, he decided to tell me that he needed to go.. That he loved me, but he needed to be "there". He reminded me of how 3 years ago, and still in high school, I promissed him that I would go "there" with him. That I would move my life to be with him. And yet, three and a half years later, I am here, and he has moved "there".
It hurts to roll over at night, and feel nothing but cold sheets, with nothing occupying the space in between. It kills me to be able to accomplish something, and have to tell him over the phone, not being able to have those well deserved hugs, or those "great job babe" kisses. While all this stuff sounds so sappy, and cliche', I can't help but feel it everyday.
However, when Jon left, he said I needed time to become stronger, and self reliant. He said I would become independant, and I would have more time for my friends, which I neglected to think about.
I thought I was over. The week before he left, I remember collapsing on Josie's floor, and I lost it. I kept saying "I don't know what I'm gonna do!, What am I gonna do?" And she hugged me.... She was there.... IN fact, I can't say that I have too many friends.. I have a few that I talk to on a regular basis, and see on a fairly regular basis. And I thank God everyday for the people he has brought into my life.... But I have an outstanding appreciation for the people who are in my life. And I try to tell them more often. It's something I try not to take for granted anymore.
I dont know what is to come.. And I can't say who I will be with in the future, or who I may see and speak to. But I can say that I will give Jon the chance that he gave me. I will be "there" with him... If it doesn't work out, it doesn't. But I have learned that I CAN accomplish things, and I don't need people or trophys to help me get there.
I have found myself, I think....
And I gotta say, it feels good.
*Sigh*