My Story
Its always hard to see your parents fight.... Especially when it is over less-than-fightable shit. My parents started fighting over a pack of cigarettes. "Oh Boy" I was thinking, cigarettes. Things just started to escalate, and dad was going to take off to bath, where we have a seasonal camp, for a few days. Mom was thinking, "wow, maybe things will cool off". Well, my dad called at about 8:30 and said he was in bath... A few minutes after I had gotten home from the comming home party for Keith Tibbits. Mom told me when I got home "dad just called... He's in bath, maybe he'll cool off for a few days." Not 10 minutes after dad called, Allison (down from canada) called, and said "I don't know if you know where your dad is, but I SWEAR I just saw him walking in town by the bar.... Well everyone knows me... I wend in town, drove to Gary's house, and walked down to the bar. I walked into the bar, and all through it.... Dad wasn't there... I walked BACK into the bar, dad really wasn't in there. So I stopped, waited for the bartender to come over to me, and said "My dad's truck is parked accross the street, but he's not in here." "Who's your dad" she said. "Doug Rollins..." "Oh yeah," She said, "He just got a ride home. I knew something wasn't right.. I get feelings like that... So I walked back up to Gary's, I called mom. "Is dad home?" "Yes" She said. "Are you okay?" "No" she said. JUst then, the phone wend dead... So I frantically called back. She answered, dad did too. He was cussing every name in the book. Jon and I drove home.................................. When I walked upstairs, I heard dad persistantly telling my mom "Get out of my house.... I Hate you... Get out." He didn't even sound the same, and when I walked up to the living room, shit WASN'T right. THere was a card table flipped over in front of my mom, and the land-line phone was on the floor. Dad kept telling mom to leave... I looked at mom, and she said "Call the cops now... He hit me." It was plain to see that dad had too much to drink, and was in a total black-out. If you have never been exposed to how an alcoholic works, then you probably don't know what a blackout is... You pretty much don't know what you are doing... I couldn't tame him down no matter how hard I tried, and I usually can. I didn't even reconize my dad, how he was acting, ad how he was speaking. His eyes were cold, his speack was slurred, and he was NOT himself. I had to call the cops... And I screamed at my mom: "Mom get the FUCK downstairs NOW..." She did, and I was upstairs with my dad, alone. I knew he would never hurt me, besides, I wasn't the one he was mad at... I had to go downstairs too... The cops came, and he was all alone upstairs. Since he hit my mom with the phone, the cops were cautous. Jon, his mom, my mom and I were standing in the driveway... I called dad. "Dad, I love you. PLease cone down... THe police wanna talk to you. I love you.." "Okay.. Ill come down. JUst let me put my shoes on..." "good" im thinking.. "this is over with". NOPE He didn't come out. I called back, he said he was putting his shoes on. I think things in his mind were starting to register, and he was scarred shitless. He still didn't come out. I called back... "WHAT!!!?!?!?!? IM putting my fuvking shoes on.. What the fuck is wrong with you???!!!!!!" He screamed. He eventually came out.. THe cops searched him.. When they went to cuff him, he resisted... I had to see my dad thrown on the ground, and get cuffed.. It hurt so bad. I sat at my table for over n hour before I would write a statement against my own father. I have never hurt so bad in my whole life. To top it off, the cops searched my house. GUESS WHAT!?!??! To all the people who say we peddle drugs out of our house YOU CAN GO FUCK YOURSELF!!!!!!! I have seen people gawk, stare, glare, and so many other things. I talked to my dad, and he is going for counceling, rehab, and anything that can make and WILL make him better. Everyone that knows my dad knows that he is NOT likw this. Alcohol can make you do crazy shit.... To top it all off, I an at my uncles house right now, and this morning we were going to go see my grampy in NH. This morning, I found out that he died. Things are so hard, with college and all. My brother is back from Florida, and he is struggling with alcohol too. He hasn't touched a drop since all this shit happened, and I pray that he will stay strong. This makes me realize that petty fighting with friends is nothing. The clothes I wear are nothing. There are things in this world that matter so much more, and I hope I can help change for the better.
I have been trying to diet for so long. I realized that while Rusty and my father are addicted to alcohol, I have an addiction to something too. I eat. Well, if dad and rusty can turn their lives around, so can I. Since this happened, I have been on a "healthy-food" diet. I also porportion a LOT. I am looking at the bright side of things. Although things are still up in the air, and mom and dad can't speak, my mom, my brother, my father, and I are being strong. And noone can bring us down.
I have been trying to diet for so long. I realized that while Rusty and my father are addicted to alcohol, I have an addiction to something too. I eat. Well, if dad and rusty can turn their lives around, so can I. Since this happened, I have been on a "healthy-food" diet. I also porportion a LOT. I am looking at the bright side of things. Although things are still up in the air, and mom and dad can't speak, my mom, my brother, my father, and I are being strong. And noone can bring us down.