(no subject)
Ever been so bored, you irritated even yourself? That's how I am tonight. Casey is having to work late, and I'm just bored. I want to do something, but don't know what to do. I can't go anywhere, b/c I have the kids. The internet, as big as it is, has nothing on it for me tonight. I'm just tired of being here in the same ol routine... At least it is stable tho. I should be thankful for that much. I just want a little excitement in my life for a change. Not too much, mind you. Just enough to satisfy my craving.
I just got done reading a "smut" book by Johanna Lindsey. It was great. The main woman in the book had lead such a boring life during her childhood that when her mama died she went on a world tour. She wanted to discover the world. I guess I'm feeding off of that. I wanna see the world. Not just NC. I wanna have grand adventures and great sex every time I turn around. Lol, ok maybe not every time I turn around.
This whole thought process brought me around to mine and Casey's beginnings. We have a story that could rival any of the best romance novels. It follows a historical romance time line too... Short, sweet, and to the point. I just have found over the years that we don't have that initial lust, or desire, or whatever it was that started the sparks between us. Don't get me wrong, there is still chemistry there, but its not explosive like it was in the beginning. The butterflies are usually gone; only on occasion do they reappear. It kinda evolved. It is more of a respect thing now, rather than just pure lust. I don't really know how to explain the way it is. I still desire him, and I think he still desires me, but it isn't the main focus of our existence anymore, no matter how much I would like for it to be. I find myself admiring him. Not as a lover, but as a man; as a friend.
Ok. The train of thought just left the station. Not sure if I am making any sense. Its not like it matters though. Not sure anybody even reads my thoughts anyway. Not that it matters if they do or don't, I suppose. Ok, good night. :-)
I just got done reading a "smut" book by Johanna Lindsey. It was great. The main woman in the book had lead such a boring life during her childhood that when her mama died she went on a world tour. She wanted to discover the world. I guess I'm feeding off of that. I wanna see the world. Not just NC. I wanna have grand adventures and great sex every time I turn around. Lol, ok maybe not every time I turn around.
This whole thought process brought me around to mine and Casey's beginnings. We have a story that could rival any of the best romance novels. It follows a historical romance time line too... Short, sweet, and to the point. I just have found over the years that we don't have that initial lust, or desire, or whatever it was that started the sparks between us. Don't get me wrong, there is still chemistry there, but its not explosive like it was in the beginning. The butterflies are usually gone; only on occasion do they reappear. It kinda evolved. It is more of a respect thing now, rather than just pure lust. I don't really know how to explain the way it is. I still desire him, and I think he still desires me, but it isn't the main focus of our existence anymore, no matter how much I would like for it to be. I find myself admiring him. Not as a lover, but as a man; as a friend.
Ok. The train of thought just left the station. Not sure if I am making any sense. Its not like it matters though. Not sure anybody even reads my thoughts anyway. Not that it matters if they do or don't, I suppose. Ok, good night. :-)