(no subject)
i've spent so much time swallowing my family down deep beneath the soft folds of my belly. sometimes i think maybe i have swallowed so much that my throat stings with the sugar and flower petals in the wind that i have withheld from myself. my chest swells with the desire to let go, burst into flames and leave myself ravaged. to place myself naked and weakened, alone on the frozen tundra, to sink into my depths and feel the entirety of my family's ills no matter how brutal. if only from that moment on i could walk forward to the ocean in full force.