gudbai
farewell 2008; i'm not good with goodbyes?
well, if that first line above doesn't sum up this year, in a whole then i don't know what will. this year has taught me so much. some things i didn't want to learn. in fact, a lot of the things i'm sure i could have gone without experiencing. i've made some of the most amazing friends, and lost those same exact people. i grew apart, i grew up. i learn to cry my hardest. i attempted to go vegetarian, but i realized in that same week that i'm not fond of vegetables. i fell in love. three times. i gave my heart out each time. it hasn't been returned yet. i miss the two most important men in my life. i know they won't come back. this year was supposed to be everything and more. well, it was that. but it was everything and more of what i didn't want. have you ever realized how, everyone plans on having the best year of their lives once January rolls around? and then when it gets here, and reality sets in we just continue living the same way we did the previous year? as humans we're used to cycles, and that's the genetics of it. so therefore, we can not be blamed for continuing the same things, year after year. everyone wanted to loose those 15 extra pounds, spend more time with their families, quick smoking maybe? fall in love.. or move on from a past love, that let you fall, and didn't even look when you fell right in front of their damn face. i've never been good with goodbyes, and i never will be, and that's what this year has really taught me. it's really put things in perspective that i should hold onto and cherish people as long as their around, because i can't tell you how many times, this year alone i've been left here flying solo. my heart isn't like a library book sweetie, you can't check it out, flip through and skim it until you've had enough, and then return it. you need to take it home with you, and study that thing until you eyes can't open anymore. maybe it's my fault. maybe i should have been the one to check into some of the library fees from the men who've taken my heart, and or book at their will. all i know is, this year..i'll be on the withdrawn shelf.
hello 2009.