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[babydyke87]

Heart Broken .....the love of my life is gone
                             I
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                                     L
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                                           too deep      In something that never was mine and now I have to suffer the

Comments

[anonymous]

Well Im sorry you hurt..no one should have to hurt. But ..I know what happend, through what Rosi told Jess about what was going on between you guys... Maybe you did tell Rosi it was wrong.. but it didnt stop you..you did nothing to prevent it, so not only was Rosi in the wrong, but you were too. If you knew it was wrong..why did you go with it? Jess can forgive..but she cant forget.. I know how she is, I know how she thinks, she has forgiven Rosi..but I know she still hurts.. I dont know if as bad as you..or wut,but that doesnt matter, either way Jess didn't deserve any of that..she didnt deserved to be crushed again..and yet..she still has the will to go on with Rosi..and Continue giving Rosi her all. Im sorry for the way things worked.. your not a bad person for loving someone.. I just hate the fact that you knew, and didnt stop any of it, and more so..I hate that Rosi could do this to Jess... I hate seeing her hurt. Noone deserves to hurt the way Jess has been, or even the way you have, even if what you did was wrong. Jess trusted Rosi when she said you two were only friends..she didnt let her fears interfere with the trust she put in Rosi when she told her that...and I know how hard it is for Jess to trust someone because of her past experiences.. I dont know what the outcome of this will be.. I know Jess wont let go of Rosi..but the trust issue..? that may be a problem for Jess..I hate this...I hate seeing her hurt and trying to cover it up like shes ok..thats just how she is.. I still dont get how you could do this..or even how Rosi could.. she 'loves' her right..? You dont crush the person you love...especially when she confided in Rosi when she said you two were only friends..an all around Lie.. and once again, with they way Jess' mind works, she blames herself..and again, she feels liek all she ever was, and possibly will be to people, is A lie.
-D

[babydyke87]

I know I did wrong...I do...but Rosi and I are over and that's all that has to be done. I just got to move on and accept that she's not my lover anymore. No matter how much I love her or am in love with her. And I'm sorry if Jess hates me and I'm sorry that she hurts. It was wrong of me to do that but it felt so true so real with Rosi and Rosi will always be in my heart because for the first time in my life I fell in love with someone...hard...She is my first love and she always will be..nothing..and no one will ever change that. I did wrong. My feelings took over my common sense. I knew that she was doing wrong and I did try to stop her but she kept pushing saying that she loves me and to just forget about it and stop thinking about it because it was her and i not her i and jess. And that's why I stopped because I hated being in the middle. I hate that. But what has been done I can't turn back time or take away the pain me and Jess and even Rosi feels. I just can't and I would do anything in the world to change it but I can't. And that's all I can say. I'm sorry.

- Trey

[anonymous]

I know Jess doesn't hate you, she doesnt know you well enough to hate you, hate's a strong word and she doesn't throw it around like it's nothing, just like she doesn't throw love around like it's nothing, she's just not too fond of you, especialy at the moment. I understand that what happened, happened..even Jess understands that, and no one can change anything. I know what it's like to love someone, to have your first love, and lose them, or feel like you can't have them, i'm in that situation now. I'm sorry you went through that. And I'm sorry if I came across as mean to you in anyway in any of these comments, if I have, i haven't meant to, I had no intentions of that..I'm just so angry because all that has happened to Jess...and in a way angry..because Jess is so free with it,she still holds on, when she didn't deserve any of this,but I guess it's good that she's so willing to work things out and let it be in the past, but I guess I cant blame her for wanting to try to go on with Rosi..I know she really loves Rosi..I mean..she yelled at me today when I told her that she didn't deserve to hurt the way she has been..and that she should break it off..she yelled at me for being so negative towards the one she loves rather than being there for her, and that's what I'm trying to do, is be there for a friend, by informing you of all of this. As for the whole..rosi telling you it was her and you, and not her you and Jess..it was never her and you..it was obviously you her and Jess..because as she was saying she loved you..she would turn around like nothing, and tell Jess she loved her..like it was nothing, like Jess was the only one. That hurts me..because I know if Jess knew that in as much detail as I do...it'd crush her even more, because, once again..her past experiences. In the beginning it took alot for her to let herself love Rosi, as much as she wanted to let herself love her and as much as she knew she was falling for her more and more, she couldn't just disregard the feeling, it was hard to let herself go back with someone, especially with her feelings as strong as they were for Rosi, it scared her because after her last relationship..she just wanted to give up..after being played for 8-9 months of the relationship that was going on a year before it ended. Jess doesn't speak negative of you,or Rosi, when she has negative thoughts she holds them in because she would only be saying things she didn't mean because of everything that has happened has made her so angry and has hurt her so bad..she is so closed with her thoughts, its hard to help her at times, she doesn't ever seem like she wants help, only..wanting to handle things on her own, she hates sympathy from others because then she feels like she is only dwelling on her problems. I know she hurts, no matter how hard she tries to hide it, but I also know she is trying to be strong and let it all go as hard as it may be.
-D

[babydyke87]

I know and I have trust issue too and i'm in the same boat as Jess because right before Rosi I was played for 9 months and then I got played by Rosi so I know how she feels. I'm glad you don't hate me or even she doesn't hate me because i'm really a good girl and all but sometimes I fuck up like whoa. It's not always good to hold in your feelings though I learned the hard way. You hurt the ones you love and you'll just burst at some point and it's not good. But thank you for telling me everything and your opinion.

- Trey

[anonymous]

Yeah, I try to tell Jess she shouldn't hold things in, but shes too stubborn, she doesnt like sympathy...shes too strong willed. but in a way..that can be good. Because then there are those people who are too self absorbed, that dwell on their problems, and all they want is sympathy. Depends on how you look at it I guess. She seems to deal with whatever problems she has pretty well though..though I dont like it and wish I could help more. I guess things between her and Rosi are straightened out, Im scared for her.. I dont want her to get hurt again though, a person can only take so much.. with her past of being suicidal that scares me, the only reason she stopped cutting..was for Rosi, and the only reason she would cut again..would probably be for Rosi, if that makes sense? She just loves that girl to death...and I hate worrying for her, and I hate that shes so easily forgiving sometimes. She doesnt deserve to be hurt. She tends to let people walk all over her..I hate it :(