Its hard to dream big
I like that this website hasn't changed much. No new format or trendy revamped logo. Its comfort in an ever evolving cyber world. Those that need the journal will return regardless of how many ways they can update their profile. Social networking sites can become exhausting and I am embarrassed to say that I am as addicted as the next. This, however, feels a little like home.
So what to do now.......
I have to say that if I met that 20 year old I was 5 years ago, I'm not sure I'd recognize her. I've established a whole new life out here and have learned more about growing up than I was ever prepared for. I've now been working the same 'dead end' job for the past two years, living with my current boyfriend, and just waiting for whats next. So what is next?
I'm not sure how long I can go along doing what I"m going now. Things are not moving at all and Im far too young still to be stagnant. Is it enough to be content if you are bored? Then I suppose thats not contentment huh. I guess I feel I should be content, seeing as I am blessed in so many ways right now. No real hardships worthy of competing with todays enormous problems. I guess I just feel that this can't be all there is for me. And it may not be but until I can work up the slightest bit of motivation and excitement for my life, than nothing is going to change. I wish I knew what happen to that 'hungry' girl. I think maybe all my ambition got buried in a world of politics and money.......otherwise known as The Real World.
So what to do now.......
I have to say that if I met that 20 year old I was 5 years ago, I'm not sure I'd recognize her. I've established a whole new life out here and have learned more about growing up than I was ever prepared for. I've now been working the same 'dead end' job for the past two years, living with my current boyfriend, and just waiting for whats next. So what is next?
I'm not sure how long I can go along doing what I"m going now. Things are not moving at all and Im far too young still to be stagnant. Is it enough to be content if you are bored? Then I suppose thats not contentment huh. I guess I feel I should be content, seeing as I am blessed in so many ways right now. No real hardships worthy of competing with todays enormous problems. I guess I just feel that this can't be all there is for me. And it may not be but until I can work up the slightest bit of motivation and excitement for my life, than nothing is going to change. I wish I knew what happen to that 'hungry' girl. I think maybe all my ambition got buried in a world of politics and money.......otherwise known as The Real World.