(no subject)
I never know what to think anymore. One min he is so sweet the next a rageing ass for no reason. Yesterday we got in a fight because he stayed up all night and then wouldn't get up to go and try to get a job as promised. So I started packing my things and as always he must get violent. I thought after valentines day things were going to get better he got me this beautiful ring. Heart shaped with diamonds on the sides and when he gave it to me he told me things were going to be getting better. They do for a little bit, but always end up going back to the way they were. After yesterday though he has been alot more apologetic and seems to be trying hard to prove he can do better. I hope it lasts. Everyone tells me I can do better and I should, but no one seems to get its hard to just up and leave and forget all the feelings you have for someone. Its easy when your standing on the outside and have no emotional attachment to say just leave. When if they were in my shoes it wouldn't be that easy for them either. I love him truly love him with all my heart and it hurts me so deeply for everyone around me not to like him like i do. I wish things were better between me and him and with everything else. I hope he finds a job soon maybe that will make things better. Who knows.....