theres no way any ones gunu read all of this
if you read all of this and theres any thing that dosnt make sice or is spelled wrong its cuz its 400 freaking oclock in the morning and i dont feel like speel checking or proof reading and if you read all of this then you realy do love me not that any one is gunu read it all but whatever ahh it was so gay i was sitting here the other night writing in my lj and it was a lot like 3 pages and then my computer froze and lost all of it thats right all of it i was so sissed so i chucked my phone at a soft lazy-boy chair cuz i was mad well guess what i miss the damn chair ahhhh freakin-a any way i guess its ok that all the stuf wrote got lost it was all sad dipressing shit anyway nothing any one realy wants to read i sat there and litterally just wrote everthing that came to my mind about my past about ppl i deal with ever day about how i feel ever wakeing moment of my life of all the shit in the world wow there i go agin being gay but im tellingyou giv me time and you will want to kill me cuz i can talk and type as long as i can breath so i get a little anoying after a wile but if the whole world just took what i said and made it law ever one would be happy well i would be hppy and thats all that matters right but realy the things that piss me off i think piss ever body off so in the end it would all work out o yea i want ever one to know that i killed my ex well only in my dream last night but i still had to get that of my chest you know befor i started going out with her i had i dream that her bf at the time was holding her under water in a school pool and i walked in jumped in the pool hit him pushed him under water and never let him up no matter how hard he tryed to come up for one litte gasp of air i held him there slowly dieing his lungs filling with one of the thing i love..... water woderfull clear water a pure way to go dont you think but it was just a dream i dont kill anymore have befor well if i told you that you heart might start to beat faster then it already is you might look at me diferantly or maybe non of the above but will never know cuz im not gunu answer that well not in this entry atleast but any way you know in the entry that i lost i talked about how i cant find a girl that want a real relationship and thinking about my ex realy makes me know that thats so true cuz she told me she would never leave i just want a girl i can trust a girl that wants to be held a girl that lets me look in her eyes till the smile on my face leave nothing of the pain a girl that looks at me like i look at her cuz when i look at some one i love i cant help but to think of her as anything less then missing pice of my heart that but whatever thats just me thers no such girl as willy wonka put it best and if you never saw that movei your a loser and if you saw it and still dont know what the hell im talking about watch it agin its in a song but girls now nd day i think are actting the same notice i said actting cz theres not all the same but there raped in them self and there never ready to put there heart on the loine they put up fronts so you think they care but what do i know im not a girl im just one guy in a world full of guys looking for a girl in a world full of girls that dosnt even exist and i think if she did i would spend my whol life looking for her only to find that she wasnt looking for me so bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla i talk to much as i kep on typing but really when you think about it how do you know your ever gunu find some one who makes you as happy as tigger at the end of the tigger movie some one out there gets that anyway but you dont its like you walk arond passing ppl every day that could be that one person who knows my one person could read this but ill never know just like youll never know if that girl or guy who cout your eye in the mall the other day for just a brife sec is your one person it makes me sad to know that there are ppl that need each other out there and they cant find one another its so sad la la la la la la la la o yea i was saying something um wow whever i was just sayinf F it one time when i was a loser i was sitting in this guys house and i was scared cuz he was pissed at me cuz something went wrong with something i was doing for him anyway he told me that if it wasnt for how nice i was he would have killed me see i was in to a lit of bad stuff but i was alway very nice to the ppl i had to deal with and he said that he was so use to these hard core im kill you ppl that it was nice to meet some one who was just nice and them self i have no clue what that has to do with any thing but i was sitting here and i thought about that day it was one of many sad days in my long tiring life but whatever see now im starting to feel like the other night writting what ever comes to my head but yea lalalalalalalalala 5 min later winnter must be cold for those with no warm memorys sorrry movie an afair to remember good movie great movie no reading this has probibly seen it but if you have i love you and if you even read to this far i like you you know its sad iv seen ever movie ever made not including porn i think it cuz i worked at a video store for so long but still iv seen a lot of movies and iv never seen a movie where no one is happy at the end weather its the good guy who saves the day our the bad guy who get the upper hand or the love movies that end with the romantic kiss but my point is some one is happy but in like out of all the ppl i incounter how many will have there happy ending like 1 and that out of 246575747475747547457.50 theres no point to anything i just said right there so what ever umm i gunu go to bed now yea ill be back sooner or later i alawys come back sorry movie agin um bye