Is there a point?
You know, despite all our "knowledge" and our curiosity and our.. sentience? there still remains one question yet to be answered definitely: Is there a point to all of this?
Yeah, we further our understanding as a species, but is there a point to it? Immortality is out of the question: there is no way for the world to survive if we achieve immortality because overpopulation and stagnance will doom first our environments and then ourselves.. unless you take the satirical advice of whats-his-name, Swift -- you know, the "modest proposal" he made that would simultaneously solve world hunger and overpopulation: eat babies. Unless we opt for such a cannibalistic resolution, there can be no immortality for us. Who would want immortality, anyway? Immortality is just prolonged suffering on this world of ... illogicality. And hey, if we were immortal we would either cease to give rise to new generations, or do so exceedingly slowly. That means that we can no longer adapt to our surroundings. I forget exactly where I read this.. it might've been in WHEN THE AIR HITS YOUR BRAIN, that neurologist's book. Either way.. immortality does no good for the world OR for us. So, out of the question.. unless you're one of the completely ignorant, and you know what they say about ignorance...
So what's the point? We're here trying to prolong our lives, but is that really that wise? We live, we give rise to a new generation, we die... then the same damned thing happens to the next generation, and the next, and the next, and so on infinitely.
So what's the point to each individual existence? My sister and I were discussing this in the car on the way home (haha such a drab topic yes? But lately neither of us are exactly the uber happy campers we're supposed to be).
What do we get out of all of this? There is nothing we can take with us, and hell we don't even know of there will even be an "us" once our physical selves cease to function. Is there a spirit world? Is that even worth bothering with? What happens?
Maybe it'd be better if ceasing to exist (function) physically meant the complete termination of our existence. No souls, no spirits, no afterlife.
But then there would be even LESS of a point to living, right?
This isn't suicidal or anything at all, lol.. nor depressed nor emo. It's just speculation, contemplation. It's a question everyone, or nearly everyone, has asked. It's not hard to come up with this question, right? I mean, take a look at our lives.. we're born, we learn, we reproduce, we work, we grow old and retire, we die. Maybe there's happiness inserted here and there, but is it really a worthwhile activity to pursue happiness? Do we get more out of it than we invest into our lives ... our miserable, busy, stressful lives?
Maybe that's just a pessimist's way of looking at things, but lately small negativities have been building up around me, within me... thus the glass is at present half empty. I'm irked, stressed, confused, tired, BLAH'd. I want to get away but I can't, because I have no excuse, I want to focus but I can't because there's too much going on around me. Sigh.
Anyway, my conclusion right now is that there is no point, it's just a monotonous cycle that each and every one of us have to participate in for some reason or other. So, I guess, make the most of it, right? Carpe diem? But.. egh. That's where human conscience comes in, and goddamn your conscience can make you feel like the idiot of idiots if you do the smallest thing wrong...
I know I should let go and just live, but... I don't know what's stopping me and I don't know how to get rid of it. A part of me is still clinging desperately to some teeny shred of hope that there MIGHT at least be SOME sort of a "grand plan" or "grand scheme" to what's going on in the world.. something GOOD and worth hoping for.
Though some of me has begun to see pointlessness in everything, every ideal and hope... the rest of me refuses to start functioning like a robot. I'm still clinging to naive ideals and dreams.. who knows if that's going to be good or bad for me in the end? For some reason, though, I have this formidable feeling that I'm not going to get what I'm bargaining for.
Anyway, 'side from all this thinking stuff (flip side to long drives.. sometimes it lets you think when you NEED to, but sometimes it MAKES you think when you don't want to), things have been fine. Fine.. neither great nor horrible. Classes are okay, I feel a little lost in Calc (haha blame myself for taking 180 like almost 2 years ago then taking 181 now.. after I forgot almost everything), but Bio and Chem seem like they'll be fine. I have a fear that I'll start falling asleep in Chem lecture, and I'm already dreading lab report writing in Chem, but eh.
Something to keep me busy, at least.
I really can't wait until late May, though. Hopefully I can claim some more control over my life by then, what with grandparents possibly leaving early for Taiwan and mom working 3 days a week.. meaning more time where I get to decide what to do with MY time. Without them knowing, because come ON, they wont even let me touch the stove because mom nearly burned down the house when SHE was little >.> I'm not THAT careless.. sheesh.
Yeah, we further our understanding as a species, but is there a point to it? Immortality is out of the question: there is no way for the world to survive if we achieve immortality because overpopulation and stagnance will doom first our environments and then ourselves.. unless you take the satirical advice of whats-his-name, Swift -- you know, the "modest proposal" he made that would simultaneously solve world hunger and overpopulation: eat babies. Unless we opt for such a cannibalistic resolution, there can be no immortality for us. Who would want immortality, anyway? Immortality is just prolonged suffering on this world of ... illogicality. And hey, if we were immortal we would either cease to give rise to new generations, or do so exceedingly slowly. That means that we can no longer adapt to our surroundings. I forget exactly where I read this.. it might've been in WHEN THE AIR HITS YOUR BRAIN, that neurologist's book. Either way.. immortality does no good for the world OR for us. So, out of the question.. unless you're one of the completely ignorant, and you know what they say about ignorance...
So what's the point? We're here trying to prolong our lives, but is that really that wise? We live, we give rise to a new generation, we die... then the same damned thing happens to the next generation, and the next, and the next, and so on infinitely.
So what's the point to each individual existence? My sister and I were discussing this in the car on the way home (haha such a drab topic yes? But lately neither of us are exactly the uber happy campers we're supposed to be).
What do we get out of all of this? There is nothing we can take with us, and hell we don't even know of there will even be an "us" once our physical selves cease to function. Is there a spirit world? Is that even worth bothering with? What happens?
Maybe it'd be better if ceasing to exist (function) physically meant the complete termination of our existence. No souls, no spirits, no afterlife.
But then there would be even LESS of a point to living, right?
This isn't suicidal or anything at all, lol.. nor depressed nor emo. It's just speculation, contemplation. It's a question everyone, or nearly everyone, has asked. It's not hard to come up with this question, right? I mean, take a look at our lives.. we're born, we learn, we reproduce, we work, we grow old and retire, we die. Maybe there's happiness inserted here and there, but is it really a worthwhile activity to pursue happiness? Do we get more out of it than we invest into our lives ... our miserable, busy, stressful lives?
Maybe that's just a pessimist's way of looking at things, but lately small negativities have been building up around me, within me... thus the glass is at present half empty. I'm irked, stressed, confused, tired, BLAH'd. I want to get away but I can't, because I have no excuse, I want to focus but I can't because there's too much going on around me. Sigh.
Anyway, my conclusion right now is that there is no point, it's just a monotonous cycle that each and every one of us have to participate in for some reason or other. So, I guess, make the most of it, right? Carpe diem? But.. egh. That's where human conscience comes in, and goddamn your conscience can make you feel like the idiot of idiots if you do the smallest thing wrong...
I know I should let go and just live, but... I don't know what's stopping me and I don't know how to get rid of it. A part of me is still clinging desperately to some teeny shred of hope that there MIGHT at least be SOME sort of a "grand plan" or "grand scheme" to what's going on in the world.. something GOOD and worth hoping for.
Though some of me has begun to see pointlessness in everything, every ideal and hope... the rest of me refuses to start functioning like a robot. I'm still clinging to naive ideals and dreams.. who knows if that's going to be good or bad for me in the end? For some reason, though, I have this formidable feeling that I'm not going to get what I'm bargaining for.
Anyway, 'side from all this thinking stuff (flip side to long drives.. sometimes it lets you think when you NEED to, but sometimes it MAKES you think when you don't want to), things have been fine. Fine.. neither great nor horrible. Classes are okay, I feel a little lost in Calc (haha blame myself for taking 180 like almost 2 years ago then taking 181 now.. after I forgot almost everything), but Bio and Chem seem like they'll be fine. I have a fear that I'll start falling asleep in Chem lecture, and I'm already dreading lab report writing in Chem, but eh.
Something to keep me busy, at least.
I really can't wait until late May, though. Hopefully I can claim some more control over my life by then, what with grandparents possibly leaving early for Taiwan and mom working 3 days a week.. meaning more time where I get to decide what to do with MY time. Without them knowing, because come ON, they wont even let me touch the stove because mom nearly burned down the house when SHE was little >.> I'm not THAT careless.. sheesh.