procrastination = update
babysitting the Stokes kids all day again tomorrow. Sam and Teddy are such cuties. I like kids, babysitting is what I've always done..but lately i've just been feeling kind of disconnected..like i'd rather be anywhere else. sometimes I'm so exhausted. Some days i love it. Watching the Krispin kids, Seth will cuddle up with me and we both get a nap while the boys are watching Star Wars. Talking to them is always amusing as well..they're both so bright and quirky. Carrying Tasha's sleepy little body upstairs after her bottle one night last week, I thought to myself: this is what I'm made for...I don't know how to describe it, just something about taking care of a child..watching a baby fall asleep in my arms..even all of the mundane things i do with them..it fills some kind of void deep inside of me. the innocence and simple joy of a little girl who has complete faith in me and doesn't care what i'm wearing or how exhausted and terrible I look; all that matters is that i came to play with her. As terribly old-fashioned and socially unacceptable as it sounds, I'd love to be a stay-at-home mom. Finding the guy of my dreams, however, is a prerequisite that isn't looking very promising at the moment. I'd get married in 2 years if... hm, this entry's going to have to be backdated and locked for quite awhile; this technique has proven quite useful in warding off unwanted readers. Only the ones who search..and they're usually the ones who care. Either that or creepy psycho stalkers. It's a risk I'm willing to take :P Now I will go back to making Valentines for my family, because I'm just that cool.