sittin around...
welll im just sittin here be4 i get up to get completely ready for work! why cant drama just go away?? i mean why does it just follow me every where?? i thought i was done with this stuff...aparantly its not totally gone yet! i thought we had finally reached the friend point n come to show we havent...still same shit its like why cant we just be friends or why cant someone just make up their minds??? i mean either u wanna be with some1 or u dont...n seriously im sick up playin emotional ping pong! well i dunno what to do...doesnt seem like anything is goin right n when i think it is it just goes right back to where i started! i want more! im ready to settle with someone..i dont want just the friend with benefits..its just not fulfilling to me! i want more...i want the since of comfort and that hes mine not that i have to worry or be like o hes really not mine all the time..i want more! why is it i cant get more...its weird its like i havent even done anything since we went out 2 or so moths ago...so its been a while! so why does he think he can come running back when he knows what we have been through! whatever im goin to his house on sunday n dont ask me why cuz i dunno! i guess i wanna see if he really thinks he'll get anywhere anymore!! just goin to watch some movies...ya anyways im an idiot but im gunna be strong!! im gunna be the strong one this time!! ok im gunna go contemplate some more!!