the thoughts in my mind are going wild
okay, soo many things have been happening. Like i said, me and my ex said our final goodbye's and that was a while ago. But I still can't stop thinking about him. I was doing really good until randomly I had this dream about him. I've tried sending him e-mails, text messages, IM, just about everything. He won't answer anything. It's a really crappy feeling. My worst fear is that he found someone else. I mean he's allowed to and all. I mean we haven't been together for 2 years, but it still hurts that I can't be with him. Of course I can't really say anything, cuz ya know...there is my current. But I have decided that I am going to break up with him soon. In fact, as soon as possible. Which could actually be a while since I barely see him anymore. I want to do it in person. Any other way is cowardly and cheesy. I don't know how to tell him though. We've been dating on and off for about 4 years and everytime we've split up its been my decision. I just get the urge to do something stupid so that he can break up with me. But that wouldn't be the right thing to do. besides, he take me back no matter what happens. which could pose a problem. Anyway. After this break up I really just want to stay single for a while, but I always say that. Right now tho, I really have no desire to be with anyone, well...except for my ex...but we all know you shouldn't dream the impossible. I still have to figure out what I want to do with my life where I want to live and all that good stuff. But I guess I'll just cross that bridge when I come to it. another thing that's been goin' on is that my cousin ran away from home. You're thinkin'..oh well kids always run away from home...well, that's not the problem...my cousin is 21 years old and her parents are control freaks. She was "supposed to go to work" but never showed up and never went home that night. She parked her car in a grocery store parking lot, destroyed her cell phone, got rid of her e-mail account and joined the military. yeah kinda extreme. Shit happens i guess. hmmmwhat else. yeah my job at the vet's hospital was pretty effin sweet at first. now all the employees are just bein' plain bitchy and when my paycheck came in i was so excited at how much it was, then i got to looking and they paid me about 80-90 bucks too much. That basically ruined my day, but hopefully they won't get my hopes up for it to just happen again. oh yeah. I was finally able to teach my dog how to sit. It was pretty easy, now shaking was a completly different story. I don't think i will attempt that one for a while now tho. I guess that's all I got right now. mmmmmsong's to form the mood:
Daniel Powter
Bad Day
Where is the moment we needed the most
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost
They tell me your blue skies fade to gray
They tell me your passion's gone away
And I don't need no carryin' on
You stand in the line just to hit a new low
You're faking a smile with the coffee you go
You tell me your life's been way off line
You're falling to pieces every time
And I don't need no carryin' on
Because you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day
You had a bad day
Will you need a blue sky holiday?
The point is they laugh at what you say
And I don't need no carryin' on
You had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day
(Oooh.. a holiday..)
Sometimes the system goes on the blink
And the whole thing turns out wrong
You might not make it back and you know
That you could be well oh that strong
And I'm not wrong
(yeah...)
So where is the passion when you need it the most
Oh you and I
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost
Cause you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
You've seen what you like
And how does it feel for one more time
You had a bad day
You had a bad day
Daniel Powter
Bad Day
Where is the moment we needed the most
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost
They tell me your blue skies fade to gray
They tell me your passion's gone away
And I don't need no carryin' on
You stand in the line just to hit a new low
You're faking a smile with the coffee you go
You tell me your life's been way off line
You're falling to pieces every time
And I don't need no carryin' on
Because you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day
You had a bad day
Will you need a blue sky holiday?
The point is they laugh at what you say
And I don't need no carryin' on
You had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day
(Oooh.. a holiday..)
Sometimes the system goes on the blink
And the whole thing turns out wrong
You might not make it back and you know
That you could be well oh that strong
And I'm not wrong
(yeah...)
So where is the passion when you need it the most
Oh you and I
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost
Cause you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
You've seen what you like
And how does it feel for one more time
You had a bad day
You had a bad day