(no subject)
Baby likes punkin pie!
baby cant type today... baby's fingers are all WIGGLY!
wah...
baby was very sad last night...
li not sure why...
li just felt like crying...
i still havent and i think i need to...
li has absolutely no reason to feel this way... i have a nice life! ( seemingly perfect to me!)
i just feel SO sad!
i cant help it... i feel bad for feeling this way with no reason... i just do.. :(
i still really want to cry... but i cant! this is very fugged up! XO
i want to go on and get SOMETHING over with! )XO
...
...
...
...
yay...
li is kinda crying now...
atleast somethings happening..
li been frusterated lately... wah...
i kinda wanna feel normal again...
but then i still want to be a little sad......
but i have no right to be sad...
not when others areworse off than i am... not when i have no reason
maybe i dont know the reason yet...
maybe it's because of HIM...
i dont think i like the way im feeling...
li is usualyy happy all the time... sometimes i forget how to relly be sad and deal with it the proper way..
i just dont know how to deal with this...
when im sad like this it makes me think about all the sad things in my life...
like how i really wish i could just tell my mommy about it but i can't.
It' so unfair! how i really need her and shes gone!
i didnt want mommy to go away...
i want mommy back...
i want to talk to mommy...
about all the things going on in my life and all my feelings about a certain person...and i dont even remember if i got to say goodbye to her...
she went so suddenly...
i hope she was able to hear me when i told her goodye...
i just hope she can hear me now...
i like to think shes watching over me and protecting me from all the bad things that happen...
but i have to accept the good along with the bad...
without bad ... the good cannot come...
so i atleast like to thing she follows me and watches me wherever i go...
i sure hope so
li is sorry for babbling all this to you all...
i didnt mean to lay my problms ( is it even relly a problem?) on you all...
i just fell .. empty without another person like mommy in my life... i just realized how i have a big hole in my heart since she died...
i dont think anything can fill it...
baby cant type today... baby's fingers are all WIGGLY!
wah...
baby was very sad last night...
li not sure why...
li just felt like crying...
i still havent and i think i need to...
li has absolutely no reason to feel this way... i have a nice life! ( seemingly perfect to me!)
i just feel SO sad!
i cant help it... i feel bad for feeling this way with no reason... i just do.. :(
i still really want to cry... but i cant! this is very fugged up! XO
i want to go on and get SOMETHING over with! )XO
...
...
...
...
yay...
li is kinda crying now...
atleast somethings happening..
li been frusterated lately... wah...
i kinda wanna feel normal again...
but then i still want to be a little sad......
but i have no right to be sad...
not when others areworse off than i am... not when i have no reason
maybe i dont know the reason yet...
maybe it's because of HIM...
i dont think i like the way im feeling...
li is usualyy happy all the time... sometimes i forget how to relly be sad and deal with it the proper way..
i just dont know how to deal with this...
when im sad like this it makes me think about all the sad things in my life...
like how i really wish i could just tell my mommy about it but i can't.
It' so unfair! how i really need her and shes gone!
i didnt want mommy to go away...
i want mommy back...
i want to talk to mommy...
about all the things going on in my life and all my feelings about a certain person...and i dont even remember if i got to say goodbye to her...
she went so suddenly...
i hope she was able to hear me when i told her goodye...
i just hope she can hear me now...
i like to think shes watching over me and protecting me from all the bad things that happen...
but i have to accept the good along with the bad...
without bad ... the good cannot come...
so i atleast like to thing she follows me and watches me wherever i go...
i sure hope so
li is sorry for babbling all this to you all...
i didnt mean to lay my problms ( is it even relly a problem?) on you all...
i just fell .. empty without another person like mommy in my life... i just realized how i have a big hole in my heart since she died...
i dont think anything can fill it...