(no subject)
hey i can't really update as much as i would like b/c my computer is a piece of shit! so i update when i come 2 samii`s house! ok.. so here's the latest..
joe...
JERK! what else is new? i feel like i have been trying so hard 2 do better 4 him but he just doesn't appreciate it! like the night before last..
we had the biggest arguement!! and it was b/c of some stupid shit that he did.. he really fucked up (AGAiN!) and then he went and tried 2 turn it on me blaming me for all the old shit! he always brings that shit up! it pisses me off b/c i know that i have fucked up but he won't let me forget about it and move on! so he was trying 2 leave me for good for no reason! it hurts b/c it was like he didn't even care! it's been feeling like that alot lately.. and i've just been trying 2 ignore it! should i try 2 make this work? i just don't think it's worth going through all of this over and over when i don't even know if there is better for me out there! ((SAMi THiNKS THERE iS!!!)) but you have 2 understand i've been w/this nigga for over 2 years and he was my first and we were engaged.. we were suppose 2 have that happily ever after together.. but it doesn't feel like that at all! then today i went 2 parrot jungle w/my work and i went out of my way and spent my $$ and bought a shirt and hat for his ass thinking he would appreciate it! but instead he doesn't call me at all and then when he finally does he acts like if nothing! grrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!! and then he was trying 2 act mad @ me for no reason! he always tries to flip the script!! so yea.. i'm mad @ him! (AGAiN!!!) and this shit is getting REALLY old! but at the same time.. i feel like i can never leave him b/c i love him ssoooo much and b/c of our history 2gether! me and him have been through sooo much! you can't even begin to imagine.....so what do i do?! im sooo confused i can't even take my mind off of it!! well, i gotta go and let samii update! xoxo