later...THAT SAME DAY:
Took my parents for a walk up to my new flat to show 'em it, and that. We were leaving the backyard when an oldish guy in blue pajamas, balding black hair and crazy eyes popped his head out of a window in the building next door and asked if I was moving in. I said yes. He said "Biggest mistake of your life" then proceeded to tell me how (and I think this might have been some weird bugbear of his, don't tell why I thought this, must be woman's intuition or something) there was only one wheelie bin between six residents, the landlord was, basically, mean, and this guy had wrote to/called/talked to/danced at/I don't know/ the landlord countless times, asking him to remedy the situation but to no avail. He also went off on one about the state of the garden and how the landlord never did anything with the property, and "you've got six students living here, and they bring all their student friends...and well, you can imagine the mess they make" which, and you may wish to start giggling now, lead back to his tirade against the landlord and the revelation that he...are you ready for this?...posts rats through the letterbox. Yes, I'm not making that up, that's what he actually told me. "But the landlord still ignores me".
Ok. A) that's hilarious. If any rats (dead or otherwise) get crammed through the communal letterbox I now know exactly who it is. B) I seriously doubt the landlord he's on about is the same one who's in charge of the flats because they're all BRAND NEW. No-one lives there yet. And I can't imagine that when they do, he'll keep the garden messy, only provide one wheelie bin, etc, because, reason C), they'd be six of us to complain. Anyway, if for whatever weird reason we only had one bin, you'd just call the council and ask for another one. And final plothole in Mr. Pajama's rant: no-one who's moving in is a student. It's all young professionals, etc. I was taking all his shit in with my most sincere 'oh really?' face, but it was hard, I tell you, hard to not pat him on the head and offer him some cheese for his rats or something, I don't know. He was like a fruit n nut chocolate bar minus the chocolate.
I'm strangely more excited about moving in now I know I have a genuine weirdo next door. I hope he doesn't try and drop a rat down my girlfriend's top when she comes to visit. :(