Random Fight
SextonOnTheBeach: Ill use my +4Orcish Condom
Blademan Foxfire: Aw man, I don't know.
Blademan Foxfire: Might not do so hot against my +4 Gnoll Diaphram.
SextonOnTheBeach: Hmmm
SextonOnTheBeach: I may have to use my +3 Elvan Gimp
Blademan Foxfire: Oh yeah? I'm dual wielding this bitch. Fear the +4 Slick Minotaur Dildo.
SextonOnTheBeach: *uses the +6 Inflatable bearbug doll*
SextonOnTheBeach: take that as a def. maneauver bitch
Blademan Foxfire: Oh hell naw.
Blademan Foxfire: I'll just pull out my crossbow of penetration.
Blademan Foxfire: And fire +1 Kobold Dong Bolts at you.
SextonOnTheBeach: (this is making me seriously laugh irl)
Blademan Foxfire: (Ditto. xD)
SextonOnTheBeach: I'll lob my +3 Teabags of Dispair and use my +7 Staff of Abstinance
SextonOnTheBeach: and that adds 2% to my charisma too
SextonOnTheBeach:
Blademan Foxfire: On no you don't.
Blademan Foxfire: I'll just counter that with Elbar's Black Tentacles.
Blademan Foxfire: (Which actually IS a spell in D&D)
Blademan Foxfire: And rape you into submission.
SextonOnTheBeach: not if I use my +7 ORCISH CONDOM!
SextonOnTheBeach: YAAAAY!
Blademan Foxfire: Then I'll just throw my Masterwork Orc Penis at it!
SextonOnTheBeach: it all rounds back to my condom
SextonOnTheBeach: And I'll summon my Clockword Vagina to counter your Masterwork Orc Penis!
SextonOnTheBeach: Clockwork*
Blademan Foxfire: Then I'll just whip out the Black Tentacles again, and tentacle rape your vaginas!
SextonOnTheBeach: you dont have enough MP noob!
SextonOnTheBeach: and thats a 3 hour spell
SextonOnTheBeach: you gotta wait
Blademan Foxfire: Oh hell yes I do!
Blademan Foxfire: I can use it four times a day!
SextonOnTheBeach: Hmmm
Blademan Foxfire: There's no time limit on Elbar's Black Tentacles!
SextonOnTheBeach: no phare!
Blademan Foxfire: What do you think this is, AD&D II rules?!
Blademan Foxfire: This is 3.5 grounds, bitch!
SextonOnTheBeach: Hmmm
SextonOnTheBeach: But, my armor
SextonOnTheBeach: is the Strawberry Flavored Fruit Edible Armor
Blademan Foxfire: That's dandy.
Blademan Foxfire: Because I have the Eggo Tower Shield.
SextonOnTheBeach: your dark spell cant penetrate it light taste!
Blademan Foxfire: No, but my shield can smear it's fruity goodness!
SextonOnTheBeach: ...
SextonOnTheBeach: *Uses his Viagra of Hope, gains +15 to all stats*
Blademan Foxfire: Oh dayum!
Blademan Foxfire: *injects himself with Thorozine of Sexiness, gains a +30 to Charismia, and is tired*
SextonOnTheBeach: *pulls out pictures of the Orcish Queen Victoria and slams it in John's face*
Blademan Foxfire: *too sexy to be injured*
SextonOnTheBeach: Hmmm
SextonOnTheBeach: *pulls out his Lust Powder and vanishes*
SextonOnTheBeach: we shall fight again!
Blademan Foxfire: Aw man, I don't know.
Blademan Foxfire: Might not do so hot against my +4 Gnoll Diaphram.
SextonOnTheBeach: Hmmm
SextonOnTheBeach: I may have to use my +3 Elvan Gimp
Blademan Foxfire: Oh yeah? I'm dual wielding this bitch. Fear the +4 Slick Minotaur Dildo.
SextonOnTheBeach: *uses the +6 Inflatable bearbug doll*
SextonOnTheBeach: take that as a def. maneauver bitch
Blademan Foxfire: Oh hell naw.
Blademan Foxfire: I'll just pull out my crossbow of penetration.
Blademan Foxfire: And fire +1 Kobold Dong Bolts at you.
SextonOnTheBeach: (this is making me seriously laugh irl)
Blademan Foxfire: (Ditto. xD)
SextonOnTheBeach: I'll lob my +3 Teabags of Dispair and use my +7 Staff of Abstinance
SextonOnTheBeach: and that adds 2% to my charisma too
SextonOnTheBeach:
Blademan Foxfire: On no you don't.
Blademan Foxfire: I'll just counter that with Elbar's Black Tentacles.
Blademan Foxfire: (Which actually IS a spell in D&D)
Blademan Foxfire: And rape you into submission.
SextonOnTheBeach: not if I use my +7 ORCISH CONDOM!
SextonOnTheBeach: YAAAAY!
Blademan Foxfire: Then I'll just throw my Masterwork Orc Penis at it!
SextonOnTheBeach: it all rounds back to my condom
SextonOnTheBeach: And I'll summon my Clockword Vagina to counter your Masterwork Orc Penis!
SextonOnTheBeach: Clockwork*
Blademan Foxfire: Then I'll just whip out the Black Tentacles again, and tentacle rape your vaginas!
SextonOnTheBeach: you dont have enough MP noob!
SextonOnTheBeach: and thats a 3 hour spell
SextonOnTheBeach: you gotta wait
Blademan Foxfire: Oh hell yes I do!
Blademan Foxfire: I can use it four times a day!
SextonOnTheBeach: Hmmm
Blademan Foxfire: There's no time limit on Elbar's Black Tentacles!
SextonOnTheBeach: no phare!
Blademan Foxfire: What do you think this is, AD&D II rules?!
Blademan Foxfire: This is 3.5 grounds, bitch!
SextonOnTheBeach: Hmmm
SextonOnTheBeach: But, my armor
SextonOnTheBeach: is the Strawberry Flavored Fruit Edible Armor
Blademan Foxfire: That's dandy.
Blademan Foxfire: Because I have the Eggo Tower Shield.
SextonOnTheBeach: your dark spell cant penetrate it light taste!
Blademan Foxfire: No, but my shield can smear it's fruity goodness!
SextonOnTheBeach: ...
SextonOnTheBeach: *Uses his Viagra of Hope, gains +15 to all stats*
Blademan Foxfire: Oh dayum!
Blademan Foxfire: *injects himself with Thorozine of Sexiness, gains a +30 to Charismia, and is tired*
SextonOnTheBeach: *pulls out pictures of the Orcish Queen Victoria and slams it in John's face*
Blademan Foxfire: *too sexy to be injured*
SextonOnTheBeach: Hmmm
SextonOnTheBeach: *pulls out his Lust Powder and vanishes*
SextonOnTheBeach: we shall fight again!