change and fuck man..
in with the new out with the old.i went to weed beach in darien ot sit and relax.as i was sitting there i was just thinking the last time i was there.. there was snow on the ground and i was happy. the sky was clear. i am talking about the last time i was there. but yea. now when i was there tonight. i did not see stars. i did not see the moon. i just saw a big black cloud. that filled the entire sky up.. it got to me that i can never keep out of trouble.. weither it is at work. with the faimly, a girl, freinds, scouts, any where.i have court on monday. then again on the 30th. so righ now i just need to get my act together. i have been keeping my room clean.. they say "a messy room is a messy mind." yea i know. but i am really trying to change. when the phone bill is up and i can get my own phone i am goin to change my number. then look to get a real life. something eles to take my mind off of school,work,freinds,scouts,family,bills. right now i clear my mind by just going to the beach and listen to the music, but now that dose not feel right. i have come along way scine the break up.well maybe not a long way but a better look on life. think think think..
ok if i do not lose my car. this i my plan for the averge day.
0500-1415: work or work out.
1415-1500: school and maybe a EMT class
2100-0000 or later: homework and read.got to start reading.
the way i see it i will out of the house for the whole fucking day.
i have been up scine 0600 with about 3 hours of sleep from friday to saturday. i was at a training cabin in darien. 1 mile from stop and shop where i was for about 2 hours relearning how to back in pull in and everything with my truck.. the fucker is huge.i have about 4 blind spots and a car can just disapper on the side of it.. but it is mine and i like it.i was relearning after the training.. i like it there . no one is there. and it is quite.. really do not have any where in norwalk like that.but yea about 3 hours of sleep last night and been up scine 0600 and it is now 0041.. i have training to go to..yea..
right now i think the big this is right now is to change again my out look on life. i mite take the tv out of my room and have my parents help me to change.. i am smart but lazy as hell. i can make a plan but can never work the plan.. that is my biggest problem right now.. some times i wish i can hit a rewind buttom and start all over again..
that is enough bitching for tonight. maybe tomorrow
ok if i do not lose my car. this i my plan for the averge day.
0500-1415: work or work out.
1415-1500: school and maybe a EMT class
2100-0000 or later: homework and read.got to start reading.
the way i see it i will out of the house for the whole fucking day.
i have been up scine 0600 with about 3 hours of sleep from friday to saturday. i was at a training cabin in darien. 1 mile from stop and shop where i was for about 2 hours relearning how to back in pull in and everything with my truck.. the fucker is huge.i have about 4 blind spots and a car can just disapper on the side of it.. but it is mine and i like it.i was relearning after the training.. i like it there . no one is there. and it is quite.. really do not have any where in norwalk like that.but yea about 3 hours of sleep last night and been up scine 0600 and it is now 0041.. i have training to go to..yea..
right now i think the big this is right now is to change again my out look on life. i mite take the tv out of my room and have my parents help me to change.. i am smart but lazy as hell. i can make a plan but can never work the plan.. that is my biggest problem right now.. some times i wish i can hit a rewind buttom and start all over again..
that is enough bitching for tonight. maybe tomorrow