(no subject)
all i do is bitch & complain, but at this point -- i do not care.
today was the big game against presque isle. i played two minutes. i cried at the end & could not stop, i talked to coach, just to see WHY i wasnt playing...he told me pretty much im rusty & my all time favorite line was "you're lucky you're playing for me, because you wouldnt play if it were anyone else"
fuck him. seriously, i live for soccer, although some of you may not believe that. i love it more than a lot of things.but for some reason i all of a sudden suck? okay, the reason i dont give it my all because i get put in to give people "breaks"...how come no one gives me a break? oh. that's right, because i go in for 7 minutes if im lucky...have a 20 minute long "break" then, i get back in for maybe 10 minutes.
i hate it. it's not right. i may be being selfish but this is ridiculous. its not just me, there are others who have to take shit from this asshole of a coach....UGH! i won't lower my self-esteem anymore because of that jackass.
im done. im going to show him something. i cant wait until wednesday.
im so mad right now. these past few days have been awful.
i just want one good day. one.
pleaaaaaaaase???
hailee made me amazing brownies today. i love her so much <3
& anthony, & kristen, & brent & sarah & chelsea r & baber &&&&&&& katieeee & robin & amy all made me smile.
thanks guys <3 thanks for taking the time just to IM me, it meant something, truly did.
there's not much left to love [except my friends]
too tired today to hate [you]
i feel the empty --
i've whited out my name
a lack of pain, a lack of hope,
a lack of anything to say...