Title: Scream and be Free
Genre: Romance/Fan Fic/Drama
Pairing: Zac Hanson/OFC
Characters: Zac Hanson, OFC, Taylor Hanson, Isaac Hanson, OC
Warnings: Language, Adult Situations
Rating: PG13-R
Disclaimer: a strict work of fiction, I own nothing except the original characters and the plot line. In no way am I affiliated to any of it.
Summary: Brielle Simmons-Hanson loves her life. She loves her husband, his children, and she loves that they've become the idealistic little family. When Zac loses what is closest to him, Brielle is left to hold it all together for the both of them. Always the one to crush under pressure, Brielle needs to find a way to keep it together and make things work with the best interest of everybody.
S/N: I am not sure how I feel about this, but here it goes...
Chapter Thirty Eight
Only Luke would show up with a pharmacy bag in one hand, a pizza in the other, and weed in his coat when asked to run a simple errand. Brielle admired his preparedness, when Luke explained why he had brought such a combination of items with him. The pharmacy bag contained three different pregnancy tests - three being an odd number, majority rules. The pizza was from Brielle's favourite spot downtown, a comfort either way the majority ruled. The weed was only to be used if the majority brought on bad news.
Opening the pizza box, Brielle groaned taking in the warm smell, lunch hadn't been that long ago but she would never pass up a chance for bar-b-que chicken pizza from Fran's Pizzeria and Luke knew that. Quickly pulling off the top of the box and neatly ripping it into smaller section, Brielle passed one to Luke before placing a slice of pizza on hers.
“No sense in doing dishes for two of us.” she stated, easing Luke's confused look.
“You realize only two types of people do that, poor college kids and drunks.” Luke laughed taking a piece of pizza and following Brielle to the table.
“Now three, if you include housewives who are home alone.” Brielle chimed in with a wink.
“I'm not entirely sure you qualify as a housewife, but we'll discuss that another day.” Luke ended his own argument, before it even began. “So, tell me, do you actually think you might be pregnant or are you just being paranoid?”
When Brielle had called and asked him to run her errand, Luke didn't question her. He wasn't doing too much and was more than happy to help her out, but he was little bit curious as to why she'd deny the possibility and a few hours later change her mind completely.
“I just want to be sure.” Brielle shrugged taking another piece of pizza and taking a bite from it. “It never hurts to know.”
“In other words, something triggered this and now you won't let it go until you've checked.” Luke recapped what he felt Brielle was saying. He had known her long enough to know how she could be at times. If something was on her mind, she wouldn't let it go until she had some sort of answer.
“With my luck, before the day ends we'll probably be in the garage sharing a joint. You'll be telling me to calm down and I'll be in a fit of tears, because once again I'm a failure at giving my husband a child” Brielle scoffed shaking her head.
Luke groaned. It wasn't the most polite thing, but he was sick of hearing this. Sometimes Brielle was too hard on herself. “Nobody, especially not Zac, sees you as a failure and you know this.” he encouraged. “Shit happens, Brielle! Big deal, you haven't got pregnant yet. You haven't even been married a full year! Most couples don't even want a baby their first year of marriage. You need to let that self made guilt go.”
Luke was very right on that, Luke knew he was right and that made it harder for Brielle to even try and deny it. Quietly picking at her pizza, Brielle had nothing to say to that. Picking up another piece of pizza, Luke took a bite, feeling a little harsh on Brielle. He had only spoke the truth.
“What brought this on? If it was those stupid comments that I made this morning, then you need to ease up on yourself.” Luke continued, feeling a little guilty himself.
“No, it wasn't you.” Brielle shook her head, wiping her hands on a napkin, she began twisting it tightly. “Ironically enough, after you said that, I realized that, well.” her voice seemed to leave her. This was Luke, why was she getting embarrassed now? “I've been late. Not just a few days, but really late.”
“Late as in?” Luke raised his brows.
Brielle nodded and blushed. “As in I haven't seen that since late September.”
Rubbing his hands over his face, Luke smirked and laughed a little. “Wow, oh, oh wow.”
“What? Why are you laughing at me?” Brielle blurted out, wide eyed.
“I'm not laughing at you.” Luke comforted her by patting her arm. “I'm shocked is all.” he admitted. “Why don't you go take a test and see what it has to say?”
Luke's suggestion caused Brielle to find an entirely new issue to worry about. Furrowing her brow, she bit her bottom lip, trying not to cry. “What if it doesn't give me what I want?”
At this point, Brielle was so used to being let down when it came to wanting a baby, she wasn't sure what to do if things worked out differently. It may be wrong to go into this with such a dull outlook, it helped if she had no real expectations.
“If it shows negative, then nobody has to even know we had this conversation.” Luke offered a comforting smile. “If it shows negative, then we go get so stoned we forget why I am even here.”
“I see you have thought this through, how gallant of you.” Brielle teased him, wiping her eyes quickly.
“You know me, I aim to misbehave.” Luke winked, grabbing the pharmacy bag next to him, he handed it to Brielle. “Go on, if you want I'll stay and if not then I can go. The choice is yours.”
Vanishing with the bag in hand, Brielle didn't give Luke any instruction either way. Assuming she was fine with him sticking around, for a little bit at least, Luke cleaned up their pizza mess while he waited. Locked in the bathroom upstairs, Brielle sat on the edge of the bathtub slowly rocking back and forth, waiting. She'd have to thank Luke later, it seemed the coffee he had bought her that morning was helping her now.
This was something she should be doing with Zac, if Zac couldn't be there then perhaps Luke was the next best thing. It didn't matter what the tests told her, Brielle could count on Luke to keep it secret. If they showed negative, then she knew Luke was already prepared to keep this entire afternoon to himself. If they showed positive, god willing, Brielle could trust Luke to keep that to himself as well. Eventually, Brielle would have to tell Zac, either way she would tell him once he was home.
Glued to the side of the bathtub, Brielle nervously wrung her hands while her nerves got the better of her. Twenty three seconds. Only twenty three seconds until the rest of her life got dictated to her. Squeezing her eyes shut Brielle tapped her foot on the tile flooring, this must be what it felt like to go insane.
Right about now, Brielle could use a stiff drink, she laughed to herself at the mere idea of that one. If things went the way she wanted then it would be months upon months before she got that stiff drink. The seconds counted down, drawing Brielle closer and closer to her fate. Unable to finish this on her own, as if life suddenly became slow motion, Brielle opened the bathroom door calling for Luke to come upstairs.
Immediately Luke rushed to the second level of the house, taking the stair two at a time while he went. Outside the bathroom door, he was greeted by a nervous and somehow delicate looking Brielle. Shoulders hunched, hand clenched in front of her, and eyes slightly glassy this wasn't how Luke was used to seeing Brielle.
“Brielle?” he asked softly wrapping his arm around her shoulder. “Are you okay?”
“I can't look.” Brielle muttered. Hugging her arms around Luke's midsection, she held tightly to him. “C-can you look for me?”
Luke sighed softly. “I can, but you need to loosen the grip.” he teased her, trying to keep the mood light. Loosening her grip, Brielle followed Luke into the bathroom. Greeted by the sight of three tests laid out neatly on the side of the sink, Luke glanced at them quickly. “Do you want to know what they say, or do you want to look?”
“Just tell me.” Brielle blurted anxiously. “Come on!” she urged rocking back and forth on the balls of her feet. She was practically jumping up and down with nerves. “Luke!”
So much for having no expectations on this!
Chuckling, Luke wrinkled his nose, the longer he could make Brielle wait the more he'd enjoy it. As mean as it was, he took his time - in reality it took him about ten seconds - to read out the results. To Brielle the ten seconds it took felt like an eternity. She had to know! Looking at the tests herself were a clear option, yet somehow hearing it from Luke would soften the blow if there was nothing but bad news.
Luke turned to face her, his hands resting on her shoulders. A clear sign of bad news. Brielle whimpered, this was torture. Another one of those times when she thought for sure she was going to be pregnant, why was life so cruel to her? It seemed as though the universe didn't want her and Zac to have a baby.
“I'm not pregnant am I?” she whispered, wrapping her fingers around Luke's shirt.
“Not pregnant? All three tests are showing positive.” Luke stated happily. “I'm no expert, but I am pretty sure that's a good thing.”
“W-what?” Brielle stuttered, her shoulders sagging and her breathing quickening in excitement. “Positive as in positive?”
“Positive as in a little plus sign, two pink lines, the word pregnant in the little window thingy. As in positive, you are in fact having a baby!” Luke exclaimed with a rather erratic laugh. Brielle's face fell, her body shaking slightly causing Luke to wrap her up in a hug. “You're going to have a baby, Misses.”
Brielle's body felt like it weighed a million tons, her limbs unable to function. Luke had possibly given her the best news she had heard in her life. Now more than ever, she wanted Zac there. Brielle could imagine how excited he was going to be when she told him. Sniffling, she had been completely unaware that she'd started to cry.
“I hope those are happy tears.” Luke laughed, wiping her cheeks with his thumb. Brielle nodded, unsure of whether or not she'd actually be able to speak. “Did you want to call Zac?”
Brielle shook her head, gently pulling back away from Luke. “Uh no, I want to tell him when he gets home. I think this is something he needs to hear in person.” she laughed a little in disbelief. “Can you not tell anybody about this? I'm sorry, but I want Zac to hear it from me before anybody else knows.”
“My lips are sealed.” Luke pretended to zip his lips closed. Again, hugging Brielle. “I do want you to know, I'm happy for you. If you need anything, until Zac gets home then I'm happy to help.”
“Thank you.” Brielle managed another round of tears seemed to begin flowing rather freely. “And I'm sorry.” she pulled away, wiping her eyes. Luke asked his obvious question of “why?”, when Brielle lurched into her reasoning. “Here you are, helping me, but when your own girlfriend was pregnant you didn't even get the chance to...”
“It's fine.” Luke cut her off with a wave of his hand, as if making it all disappear. “Jenna did what she felt was right, I can't be mad at her for that. It's the past. I can't change that, but I can take you out for celebratory ice cream.” Luke smiled, kissing Brielle's cheek.
Opting out of joining Luke for any more food, Brielle politely declined, informing him that if anything she needed a nap after all that excitement. Once Luke was absolutely sure Brielle was okay to be left alone, he said his goodbyes and let her be. Alone, again, Brielle sat on the edge of her and Zac's bed staring into the empty space of the room. More than anything she wanted to call Zac and give him the good news.
Hearing that they were going to have a baby would leave Zac thrilled, Brielle was sure of it! He had been wanting this as much as her and now they were going to get what they wanted. Standing by her decision to tell Zac once he was home, Brielle called him anyway. Talking to Zac didn't mean she had to tell him, she did want to talk to him though.
It wasn't until Zac answered the call and greeted her that Brielle realized how lonely she was without him home. “I have missed your voice.” Zac laughed a little. “Why didn't you come out with Jenna? I know you hate the bus, but a few days wouldn't be so bad.”
“Zac, I am not coming to see you.” Brielle chuckled. It wasn't that she hated the bus, it simply wasn't her favourite place in the world. “You'll be home in a week or so and I'll see you then.” a bus was too crowded, she'd be able to see Zac and that would be fine, except Brielle wanted him all to herself and the bus wouldn't allow that.
“Which reminds me, I have something for you when I get home.” Zac knew that telling Brielle he had a surprise would drive her insane.
“You do?” She asked with an over dramatic gasp. “What is it?”
“Yeah, I can't tell you that.” Zac laughed on the other end of the phone.
“What if I told you that I have something for you too?” Brielle asked, glancing in the mirror on the other side of the room, she gently ran her hand over the front of her shirt, holding it tighter to her midsection. At this stage she was still a ways off from showing her pregnancy, by the time Zac got home it would be more noticeable.
“What do you have for me?” Zac challenged, Brielle could imagine the silly grin on his face.
“Nope.” Brielle giggled. Moving to look at herself from the side she tilted her head sideways.
“Come on.” Zac whined. “I'll tell you what I have.”
“Sorry, I can't tell you that.” Brielle kept to her tormenting.
“You, my queen, are one evil lady.”
“Yeah, yeah.” Brielle rolled her eyes. “Did Jenna make it in yet?” she changed the subject.
“Not yet, did you want me to let you know when she makes it in?” Zac's voice went quieter, a sign that Isaac must be somewhere near by.
“You can, if you have time. Don't worry about it. I'm sure she'll get there safe.” Brielle answered. “Does Isaac know?”
Zac hummed a little bit, buying himself a few seconds while he escaped to the back end of the bus, away from Isaac's ear shot. When he was safe, he apologized for the lull and began talking. “He doesn't, but Jenna and I discussed it. It was my idea for her to come up here.”
“Why? Isaac said he wanted a break, don't you think it'll only upset him?”
“Yes and no.” Zac answered swiftly. “He's absolutely miserable, I've never seen him this damn cranky. He misses her and even if he does get a bit upset that we went behind his back, he'll thank us later.”
“You better hope!” Brielle sighed.
“You don't think this is a good idea?” Zac knew his wife well enough to know what that little sigh meant.
Brielle pinched the bridge of her nose, despite Zac not being able to see her. For all she knew, she could be lecturing him while he was in nothing but his favourite ninja turtle undies. “I don't want feelings hurt more than they are. Jenna left here pretty positive about this. I hope Ike doesn't crush that.”
“Naw, this is Ike.” Zac exclaimed, as if this was the most obvious thing in the world. “He's crazy for her. I don't think he'd hurt her, not intentionally. I know you like to try and protect Jenna, but I think he loves her.”
“I'm sure he does, but I still worry about her.” Brielle admitted. Jenna was tough, in theory. She still got her feelings her like everybody else. “Just watch out for her?”
“I wouldn't have told Ave to let her come, if I thought Ike was going to hurt her.” Zac made his admission. “I'd love to keep chatting, but Tay needs me and I should get going.”
“I love you, I guess I'll see you when you get home?” Brielle hated saying goodbye so soon.
“Then you can show me that surprise.” Zac chuckled. Ending his call with an “I love you.” he was gone.
Brielle sat the phone down on her bedside table and curled up in bed, pulling the blankets up around herself and snuggling into her pillow. Sleeping alone was something she used to love doing, then she met Zac and the nights spent alone seemed to get lonely. Closing her eyes and taking a deep breath, Brielle took comfort in knowing that she only had another week away from her husband. Before too long Zac would be home and she could tell him her good news.