I saw a dead sqirrel today.. and I thought of you
Heya!
I always choose the most inopportune times to update this thing.. Par example, I have to be up @ 7 to drive to the airport shuttle.. to take me to the airport for a 10:55 flight. I should be sleeping. I should have everything packed. I should be tired.. oh, and I should be your first thought upon awakening to every new day. Scratch that, you should think of me if you wake up from a nap. No no.. after every blink of your eye.
I really kept that going too long.
So, I'm offically a valay (or 'valet' as the etymologists spell it). I had training the other day. Let's sum up training: fill out 3 fileted Redwood trees worth of paperwork, claiming your taxes, watching a 24 minute poorly constructed video with outlandish situations that will never, and I repeat never, arise, and take a road test. I know you're jealous of how my Wednesday was spent, but try not to take it out on me next time we meet.
So the video 'twas filled with helpful answers to the questions that were on everyone's (well.. Darren and myself) minds; "How do I rob a customer blind, and get caught with a mini-cam?", "What do do if you curb it?" and my personal favorite, "What do I do if the customer's vehicle comes down with a severe case of Spontaneous Self Combustion?" The information was all jam-packed into an exciting DVD that can be yours today for only 3 (that's right folks 3) easy payments of $19.82. Naturally, shipping and handling will tack on an additional sum of how much one is betting to get on a distressed proporty in Roxbury.
The road test was actually, not bad. Sure, I'll make fun of it, but I got to drive a car that wasn't mine.. and I'm all for that. My weapon on choice: a 2003 Ford Escape. This baby was loaded- here's a list of it's amentities to make the driving experience all the more satisfying: seats constucted out of taylored suits that were fitted to corpses in a casket, with barbed wire as the cushion beneath my tushie, a manual gearbox that really didn't require me engaging the clutch to shift, a rear-view mirror which was basically my sunglasses and how much of a view I caught in the reflection, and brakes that were made out of the sole of my shoe. Yes, I drove this beaut around for 20 miles, just so Brian Kelley (I'm his new bitch) could see I knew how to handle the upmost of luxurious vehicles, and how to treat them with the care they deserve. Because, after all, you are what you drive, and you're nothing if you're not seen in an Escape.
Lately, Ashley has been saving me from the nursing home that is Hanover. We've played tennis (and interrupted a gym class..), we've been going to all the local coffee shops in order to get our fix of caffiene (which is just as pricey as a gallon of petrol..), and we've just been hanging out at her place watching those trashy MTV semi-reality shows (Next, Made, Parental Control..). So life's good with her. Onefourthree Pooks.
However, last week I did manage to squeeze in sometime with Ca and Taylor. Woooooo! We drove around Hingham looking for some girl's sweet 16 party, which appeared to have been located in a bank. Then we went to the Sylvester playground to chat about our freshman years. I won the conversation. I always win.
I went into Boston today to see Laurie on her lunch break. Stellar. My green shirt (basically the color of a double-mint gum wrapper) was a hit down on the docks and the BHC ticket booth. On her break, we went to Gap so she could buy a bathing suit. Red Flag- I'm not tackful, please anyone, never take me to a dressing room, I never know how to respond. You always look good. Avoided that bullet. Then we shopped for Sophie's b-day presents.. at.. a store. It's a nice store too. Everything was priced at under a dollar. We really found plenty of bargains. :-)...?
I really need to finish packing.. and attempt to get at least 4 hours of sleep here. Have yourself a lovely holiday weekend!
Write another time guys, LATA!
I always choose the most inopportune times to update this thing.. Par example, I have to be up @ 7 to drive to the airport shuttle.. to take me to the airport for a 10:55 flight. I should be sleeping. I should have everything packed. I should be tired.. oh, and I should be your first thought upon awakening to every new day. Scratch that, you should think of me if you wake up from a nap. No no.. after every blink of your eye.
I really kept that going too long.
So, I'm offically a valay (or 'valet' as the etymologists spell it). I had training the other day. Let's sum up training: fill out 3 fileted Redwood trees worth of paperwork, claiming your taxes, watching a 24 minute poorly constructed video with outlandish situations that will never, and I repeat never, arise, and take a road test. I know you're jealous of how my Wednesday was spent, but try not to take it out on me next time we meet.
So the video 'twas filled with helpful answers to the questions that were on everyone's (well.. Darren and myself) minds; "How do I rob a customer blind, and get caught with a mini-cam?", "What do do if you curb it?" and my personal favorite, "What do I do if the customer's vehicle comes down with a severe case of Spontaneous Self Combustion?" The information was all jam-packed into an exciting DVD that can be yours today for only 3 (that's right folks 3) easy payments of $19.82. Naturally, shipping and handling will tack on an additional sum of how much one is betting to get on a distressed proporty in Roxbury.
The road test was actually, not bad. Sure, I'll make fun of it, but I got to drive a car that wasn't mine.. and I'm all for that. My weapon on choice: a 2003 Ford Escape. This baby was loaded- here's a list of it's amentities to make the driving experience all the more satisfying: seats constucted out of taylored suits that were fitted to corpses in a casket, with barbed wire as the cushion beneath my tushie, a manual gearbox that really didn't require me engaging the clutch to shift, a rear-view mirror which was basically my sunglasses and how much of a view I caught in the reflection, and brakes that were made out of the sole of my shoe. Yes, I drove this beaut around for 20 miles, just so Brian Kelley (I'm his new bitch) could see I knew how to handle the upmost of luxurious vehicles, and how to treat them with the care they deserve. Because, after all, you are what you drive, and you're nothing if you're not seen in an Escape.
Lately, Ashley has been saving me from the nursing home that is Hanover. We've played tennis (and interrupted a gym class..), we've been going to all the local coffee shops in order to get our fix of caffiene (which is just as pricey as a gallon of petrol..), and we've just been hanging out at her place watching those trashy MTV semi-reality shows (Next, Made, Parental Control..). So life's good with her. Onefourthree Pooks.
However, last week I did manage to squeeze in sometime with Ca and Taylor. Woooooo! We drove around Hingham looking for some girl's sweet 16 party, which appeared to have been located in a bank. Then we went to the Sylvester playground to chat about our freshman years. I won the conversation. I always win.
I went into Boston today to see Laurie on her lunch break. Stellar. My green shirt (basically the color of a double-mint gum wrapper) was a hit down on the docks and the BHC ticket booth. On her break, we went to Gap so she could buy a bathing suit. Red Flag- I'm not tackful, please anyone, never take me to a dressing room, I never know how to respond. You always look good. Avoided that bullet. Then we shopped for Sophie's b-day presents.. at.. a store. It's a nice store too. Everything was priced at under a dollar. We really found plenty of bargains. :-)...?
I really need to finish packing.. and attempt to get at least 4 hours of sleep here. Have yourself a lovely holiday weekend!
Write another time guys, LATA!