8. Hate

[b_before_l]

(OOC: Obligatory Emo post that he 'forgets' to make private)

I hate these memories...I don't want them anymore.

I hate those candies...I wish I'd never eaten them.

I hate L...I wish I'd never grown so obsessed over him.

I hate myself...I wish I'd been more perceptive to just what was right for meI hate the happiness around me...It's always

Comments

[shadedmemories]

B... Have you ever heard the saying... 'if all you have room for in your heart is hate, there can be no room for love?'

It's a little sappy and a little cliche, I know, but it's true, to a point.

I think you're making yourself miserable. I'm not blaming you for doing that, because I think you're doing it on an unconscious level, but... You can be happy. Everyone has the capability. I learned that not long ago, because I was making myself miserable, too.

We're already dead, babe. It's a fact you have to accept. But you shouldn't think of it as the end of your life, but a start for a new one. Your previous life was dedicated to someone else, so you need to dedicate your afterlife to yourself. Be your own person, B. Because I want to get to know you more as your own person. I think I could really get to like you as your own person. :)

[b_before_l]

But what if that person is gone? What if he no longer exists? I can't find him, Duo... I look and I can't find him.
How can I be the person you want to see if I don't even know how to bring him here? What if he died that day? That... What if I killed him myself? Would my former person even WANT to come back?

[shadedmemories]

Then let me help you find him. I know I've seen bits and pieces of him, B. The real you is still in there somewhere. It might take some work to coax him out... but we could attempt it together, if you're willing... If you're willing to let me help you, baby.

Private to Duo and B

[b_before_l]

I feel like, if left alone...I'll do something I will regret.

Please... If I try to go near L or Alice in the near future....stop me from doing anything harmful to them....please...

Re: Private to Duo and B

[shadedmemories]

I'll definitely try, B.

...Why don't you move into my room with me? Would that be okay with you? I really want to help you in any way I can, and if you stay with me than we can make sure you're not alone. :) I'll be with you.

Re: Private to Duo and B

[b_before_l]

What about your boyfriend? I don't want to intrude or be the third wheel.

Re: Private to Duo and B

[shadedmemories]

...Heero's gone. The Hollow took him, I think. They took him back. I'm not quite sure on the details, but I... I don't really feel like talking about at the moment. I'd rather focus on you. It'll help take my mind off of it.

Re: Private to Duo and B

[b_before_l]

I see...

I don't trust myself to walk alone to your room. Please come and get me. I'll start packing.

Re: Private to Duo and B

[shadedmemories]

Okay. I'll come get you. Wait for me. I'll be there in a moment.

Re: Private to Duo and B

[b_before_l]

((OOC: You making thread? I'm still working on the same homework as the last two days))