(Untitled)

[b_as_a_criminal]

I'm not in prison.

This is a nice bed.

Mmmm.... What should I do?

Right. This calls for a laugh.

Hee hee hee... ha ha ha ha heh heh heh... no, no, that appeal is all wrong... B used to have a really good one. Zo zo zo... no, what was it again? Mmm... Kya ha ha ha!  That's it. Suddenly it feels dated, though. Maybe it just needs a new angle. Kya ha

Comments

[legberjack]

The hell is so funny? Whatever it is, it better be goddamn good for this early in the morning.

[b_as_a_criminal]

....

[he stares at the phone and picks it up, glancing back over his shoulder toward the bedroom with some slight paranoia, but calming himself down slightly and replying in a flat voice]

It's the death of the world. I am dead.

Who are you?

[legberjack]

You ain't dead, but you will be if you start like that every day.

More importantly, the hell are you? The hell you people get off using my phone?! It pisses me off!

[b_as_a_criminal]

But I didn't call you.

[legberjack]

Oi, what? Fff, shit. Explains a lot. Shit must be broken.

You ain't dead. Might as well be, for what this town calls exciting.

[b_as_a_criminal]

But I have to be dead.

I died.

What's your explanation?

[legberjack]

Listen, dumbass. Is your afterlife 1950's America?

Because that's where we are.

[b_as_a_criminal]

That is what it looks like.

But time travel seems implausible.

[legberjack]

You sayin' the afterlife ain't?

Oi, listen, because I'm only sayin' this shit once. We're all stuck in this shitty town. No one knows how we got here. Get used to it.

And if you have to practice a crazy laugh, you're fukkin' doing it wrong.

[Phone is slammed down. Sorry, B, that's about as friendly and helpful as Giriko gets.]

[b_as_a_criminal]

.... Mmmmm ....

[oh, that's a dialtone. Nvm.]