The rest of the Tampa trip (or Charles, part three)
The rest of the Tampa trip went pretty well. Charles is too little to take anywhere, so I stayed at the hotel with him, while Bill took Andrew all over town. We've never really spent time in Tampa before, but we were both impressed with how much there was to do - I don't think they got through half the stuff they could have seen. Andrew went to both aquariums (there's a big one, and then there's the one with the dolphins from Dolphin's Tale), and out on two dolphin-watching cruises, and to the science museum, where he climbed a four-storey tall rope structure, looked straight down, and decided he was TOO HIGH. He also went to a Yankees Spring Training game. (The spring training field was about two blocks from both the hospital and where we were staying. We could actually see the Tampa Bay Buccaneers stadium from our hotel window.) Anyway, Andrew had a blast.
I think the only part that Andrew didn't like was that it was only Daddy taking him on these things, not both parents. And we did offer to swtich out, so that I'd take him somewhere (or somewhere that was not a Yankees game, because I do have some standards), but no - he wanted either Daddy, or me and Daddy.
I can't remember if I said it here or elsewhere - Andrew goes between fascination and indifference when it comes to Charles. When he wakes up, he wants to know where Charles is. When he comes in from outside, he usually wants to show Charles whatever it is he brought home. He'll come over to where Charles is, and touch his hand, or his cheek, or his hair, and he's continually reconfirming, "Is this my baby brother?" Completely besotted and delighted. At one point, Andrew climbed up onto the bed where Charles was lying, and started to play peek-a-boo with him. "Charlie! PEEK-A-BOO! Charlie! PEEK-A-BOO!" Covering and uncovering his face. It was way cute, and yes there is video, but it's a bit topsy turvy because I held it the wrong way and then turned the camera mid recording and I don't know how to fix that.
On the other hand, if I'm holding Charlie and Andrew wants to play with me, he'll tell me, "Toss Baby Charlie to Daddy." Ah, semantics.
But mostly, it's all good. So far. One thing I'm pleased about is that Andrew doesn't seem to resent Charles the time he does spend with me or with Bill. Which is awesome, though I'm not sure that's going to be true forever. The really annoying thing is that the day before Charles was born, I finally was able to get a book from the library I'd requested a few weeks ago, one that a friend had recommended to me YEARS ago, Siblings Without Rivalry. And I meant to grab it, to bring with me, so I could read it either on the plane. Except it's still sitting in the car where I left it. Oops. I can't renew it either (I went ahead and renewed ALL my books earlier today, just in case), as someone else has requested it. And I'm positive there's stuff in there that we should be doing, or not doing, in order to keep Andrew and Charles loving each other as much as Andrew loves Charles now, and I have NO IDEA what they are.
(I am trying to refrain from saying things like "Andrew, don't you see how well your brother goes to sleep?" Partially because I'm sure that's a terrible thing to say, partially because it really isn't a fair comparison, Charles is a baby, all he does is go to sleep.)
That said... it's hard to stop comparing them, though I'm mostly comparing what I remember of Andrew's first few weeks of life, and what I see in Charles now. Which Bill pointed out is also an unfair comparison, because when Andrew was Charles's age, I didn't know him yet, and at this stage in the game, a week or two is a lot. All the same... half the time I want to call Charles "Andrew", and I actually do it about a quarter of the time. The picture I posted earlier today? I wrote the caption as "Andrew sleeps...", not Charles. Habit!
(Apart from that: Andrew prefered to sleep on his own, Charles prefers to cosleep. Andrew loved his swaddle, Charles works his arms out nearly every time and is happier with his arms by his head. Andrew spit up after nearly every bottle, Charles rarely spits up at all. The spit-up thing, though, I wonder if it's not just advancement of science. When Andrew was on formula, you had a choice of regular stuff, soy, and that was about it. Now there's about ten different options within the same brand, so if one doesn't work, you can just bounce around until you find something that does. Which means with all those different types of formula - you're bound to find SOMETHING that works. We always suspected the spit-up was the formula, and not Andrew; we just didn't have many options.)
What I'm really curious about, though - it's just a coincidence, but Charles's birthweight was exactly one ounce more than Andrew's. I can't remember the stats on his birthparents height, which I know is a factor, but I'm dying to see how Charles compares as he grows. Is he going to be taller? Skinnier? Is he going to shoot up when he hits three years old like Andrew did? (I have reasons - in that I kept all of Andrew's clothes, and I want to know if all the seasonal things are going to work for Charles or not. I had to set aside about half of Andrew's tiny baby clothes because they all have Christmas motifs on them and they're made from super thick and warm fabrics!)
But I'm digressing... back to Tampa, and Charlie's first few days.
The first couple of days that Charlie was with us, it was hard to put him down. Not in the sense that, "OMG, he's so cute, I just have to keep holding and cuddling him!" I mean, that part's true and all, but I'm talking more literally, because if I tried to put Charles down - on the bed, in the pack-and-play, in his carseat, wherever - he would be okay for about five minutes, and then start in on the wriggling and working up to a cry. If you've never heard a newborn cry - it's not really a cry so much as it is a gristling sort of complaining. Like the person at the grocery store who is so upset that their favorite item isn't in stock that they can't say any more than, "Well! I! Never! This is! Completely! UNACCEPTABLE. I can't! Ah!"
I'm sure there are people who can listen to a three-day-old baby do that, and go blithely on their way with the laundry and the dishes and the entertaining of the 5-year-old. Not me. Not Bill either, for that matter. And so... we held him. Pretty much constantly. From Tuesday on. Even when he fell asleep in our arms - when we set him down somewhere, he'd wake up in a matter of minutes.
So... we held him. And when we got to Tuesday night.... well, we kept holding him. And by "we", I mean "me".
I tried co-sleeping with Andrew, when he first came home. It didn't go well. He complained and cried and I was a nervous wreck, and it didn't seem to comfort him one bit. (He was probably feeding on me being nervous, in hindsight.) Anyway, he slept in his own bed in his own room more or less from day one, and while he's not too fond of it while traveling, and he'll still on occassion want to sleep with us, he's mostly on his own.
But I figured - I needed to sleep, and Charlie needed to sleep, and... well... I don't usually move around too much when I sleep, so I figured to give it a try. And wouldn't you know, the co-sleeping worked? Charles slept really well - I slept pretty well, and the best part was that every time he woke up, I was right there. I mean, it's not like with breastfeeding where I could just pop out a boob and let him go to town, but still - I think I was able to get his bottle much faster than I would have otherwise, because I had a sort of early warning for when he was going to wake with him next to me, than I would have if he'd been in the crib across the room.
This does mean that Bill's not in the bed - for one thing, he's not comfortable co-sleeping, never has been, probably never will be. For another, he really does move around when he sleeps, and not just move, he'll toss and turn so badly I sometimes think he levitates above the mattress. I think Bill is despairing that the cosleeping will continue after we're all home. But I don't think it will. For one thing - Charles is getting better about letitng us set him down for huge swatches of time. He took at least two naps on the couch today while I was on the computer and did dishes and folded laundry - so that's improvement. And it's better at night, too - the first couple of nights, he wouldn't settle unless I held him very close, right up snuggled to my chest. But the last couple of nights, he's allowed space between us - and it's increasing every night. So I've got hope that at some point, I'll be able to shift him into a basinet in our room at the very least.
(I'd actually try him out in the basinet tonight - but it hasn't been put together right, and one side is collapsing, and there's no sheet for the mattress. So that would be a fail for the hotel, and also a rather large "no" from me, and we'll just cosleep again tonight. Anyway, Bill and Andrew go home Tuesday, and after that, he can just cosleep with me until it's time to go home.)
Of course, now that I'm trying to think about what else there is to talk about for Tampa... I really don't have much to add. Andrew and Bill had all the fun; Charlie and I just hung out at the hotel. (Can you describe caring for a newborn as "fun"? Maybe not, but it was certainly nice; newborns who sleep a lot are pretty easy.) We went to the pediatrician's on Thursday, and afterwards I went to a nearby consignment shop because there was a coupon that I picked up at the doctor's. (It was a good shop, too, I found a used Moby wrap which will be super helpful for the plane trip back, plus shorts for Andrew because in Bill's rush to get on a plane, he packed only one pair, and three pairs of pants, and it's in the 80s here. I don't mind buying the shorts; Andrew's inventory is low anyway. Which is partially why Bill ended up packing so many pants!)
I was a bit bad, though . You don't really see the teeny tiny babies in public - with reason, of course - and anytime someone sees him, their mouths go all soft and they coo and sign about tiny babies, and I've had numerous people tell me variations of "Oh I want another" and "Enjoy these days they grow up so fast". But of course, I know the moment Charlie and I are gone, I'm sure they turn to each other and say, "Goodness, why is she taking him outside this early?" I know this, because I've done the same thing. And mostly, I'd agree with them - but then, there are six pairs of long pants for Andrew, and it's 80 degrees outside, and Charles is sleeping in his carrier, and the consignment store is right there, and there is your answer. As needs must, and all that.
*
I have started and stopped this entry so often that it's now the next day, and I can hear Charlie beginning to wake up. And the entry is an absolutely mess, and I should be good and try to organize it a bit better, but I think you'd all rather have a picture of Charlie instead.
Today, Andrew and I go to Disney. Or he goes to the children's museum with his dad. We're letting him decide. He decided last night around 9:30 that he was done with Disney, and he really really really wants to play in the heated outdoor pool downstairs, and frankly, I'm inclined to let him. We have tomorrow too - they don't fly until evening.
I think the only part that Andrew didn't like was that it was only Daddy taking him on these things, not both parents. And we did offer to swtich out, so that I'd take him somewhere (or somewhere that was not a Yankees game, because I do have some standards), but no - he wanted either Daddy, or me and Daddy.
I can't remember if I said it here or elsewhere - Andrew goes between fascination and indifference when it comes to Charles. When he wakes up, he wants to know where Charles is. When he comes in from outside, he usually wants to show Charles whatever it is he brought home. He'll come over to where Charles is, and touch his hand, or his cheek, or his hair, and he's continually reconfirming, "Is this my baby brother?" Completely besotted and delighted. At one point, Andrew climbed up onto the bed where Charles was lying, and started to play peek-a-boo with him. "Charlie! PEEK-A-BOO! Charlie! PEEK-A-BOO!" Covering and uncovering his face. It was way cute, and yes there is video, but it's a bit topsy turvy because I held it the wrong way and then turned the camera mid recording and I don't know how to fix that.
On the other hand, if I'm holding Charlie and Andrew wants to play with me, he'll tell me, "Toss Baby Charlie to Daddy." Ah, semantics.
But mostly, it's all good. So far. One thing I'm pleased about is that Andrew doesn't seem to resent Charles the time he does spend with me or with Bill. Which is awesome, though I'm not sure that's going to be true forever. The really annoying thing is that the day before Charles was born, I finally was able to get a book from the library I'd requested a few weeks ago, one that a friend had recommended to me YEARS ago, Siblings Without Rivalry. And I meant to grab it, to bring with me, so I could read it either on the plane. Except it's still sitting in the car where I left it. Oops. I can't renew it either (I went ahead and renewed ALL my books earlier today, just in case), as someone else has requested it. And I'm positive there's stuff in there that we should be doing, or not doing, in order to keep Andrew and Charles loving each other as much as Andrew loves Charles now, and I have NO IDEA what they are.
(I am trying to refrain from saying things like "Andrew, don't you see how well your brother goes to sleep?" Partially because I'm sure that's a terrible thing to say, partially because it really isn't a fair comparison, Charles is a baby, all he does is go to sleep.)
That said... it's hard to stop comparing them, though I'm mostly comparing what I remember of Andrew's first few weeks of life, and what I see in Charles now. Which Bill pointed out is also an unfair comparison, because when Andrew was Charles's age, I didn't know him yet, and at this stage in the game, a week or two is a lot. All the same... half the time I want to call Charles "Andrew", and I actually do it about a quarter of the time. The picture I posted earlier today? I wrote the caption as "Andrew sleeps...", not Charles. Habit!
(Apart from that: Andrew prefered to sleep on his own, Charles prefers to cosleep. Andrew loved his swaddle, Charles works his arms out nearly every time and is happier with his arms by his head. Andrew spit up after nearly every bottle, Charles rarely spits up at all. The spit-up thing, though, I wonder if it's not just advancement of science. When Andrew was on formula, you had a choice of regular stuff, soy, and that was about it. Now there's about ten different options within the same brand, so if one doesn't work, you can just bounce around until you find something that does. Which means with all those different types of formula - you're bound to find SOMETHING that works. We always suspected the spit-up was the formula, and not Andrew; we just didn't have many options.)
What I'm really curious about, though - it's just a coincidence, but Charles's birthweight was exactly one ounce more than Andrew's. I can't remember the stats on his birthparents height, which I know is a factor, but I'm dying to see how Charles compares as he grows. Is he going to be taller? Skinnier? Is he going to shoot up when he hits three years old like Andrew did? (I have reasons - in that I kept all of Andrew's clothes, and I want to know if all the seasonal things are going to work for Charles or not. I had to set aside about half of Andrew's tiny baby clothes because they all have Christmas motifs on them and they're made from super thick and warm fabrics!)
But I'm digressing... back to Tampa, and Charlie's first few days.
The first couple of days that Charlie was with us, it was hard to put him down. Not in the sense that, "OMG, he's so cute, I just have to keep holding and cuddling him!" I mean, that part's true and all, but I'm talking more literally, because if I tried to put Charles down - on the bed, in the pack-and-play, in his carseat, wherever - he would be okay for about five minutes, and then start in on the wriggling and working up to a cry. If you've never heard a newborn cry - it's not really a cry so much as it is a gristling sort of complaining. Like the person at the grocery store who is so upset that their favorite item isn't in stock that they can't say any more than, "Well! I! Never! This is! Completely! UNACCEPTABLE. I can't! Ah!"
I'm sure there are people who can listen to a three-day-old baby do that, and go blithely on their way with the laundry and the dishes and the entertaining of the 5-year-old. Not me. Not Bill either, for that matter. And so... we held him. Pretty much constantly. From Tuesday on. Even when he fell asleep in our arms - when we set him down somewhere, he'd wake up in a matter of minutes.
So... we held him. And when we got to Tuesday night.... well, we kept holding him. And by "we", I mean "me".
I tried co-sleeping with Andrew, when he first came home. It didn't go well. He complained and cried and I was a nervous wreck, and it didn't seem to comfort him one bit. (He was probably feeding on me being nervous, in hindsight.) Anyway, he slept in his own bed in his own room more or less from day one, and while he's not too fond of it while traveling, and he'll still on occassion want to sleep with us, he's mostly on his own.
But I figured - I needed to sleep, and Charlie needed to sleep, and... well... I don't usually move around too much when I sleep, so I figured to give it a try. And wouldn't you know, the co-sleeping worked? Charles slept really well - I slept pretty well, and the best part was that every time he woke up, I was right there. I mean, it's not like with breastfeeding where I could just pop out a boob and let him go to town, but still - I think I was able to get his bottle much faster than I would have otherwise, because I had a sort of early warning for when he was going to wake with him next to me, than I would have if he'd been in the crib across the room.
This does mean that Bill's not in the bed - for one thing, he's not comfortable co-sleeping, never has been, probably never will be. For another, he really does move around when he sleeps, and not just move, he'll toss and turn so badly I sometimes think he levitates above the mattress. I think Bill is despairing that the cosleeping will continue after we're all home. But I don't think it will. For one thing - Charles is getting better about letitng us set him down for huge swatches of time. He took at least two naps on the couch today while I was on the computer and did dishes and folded laundry - so that's improvement. And it's better at night, too - the first couple of nights, he wouldn't settle unless I held him very close, right up snuggled to my chest. But the last couple of nights, he's allowed space between us - and it's increasing every night. So I've got hope that at some point, I'll be able to shift him into a basinet in our room at the very least.
(I'd actually try him out in the basinet tonight - but it hasn't been put together right, and one side is collapsing, and there's no sheet for the mattress. So that would be a fail for the hotel, and also a rather large "no" from me, and we'll just cosleep again tonight. Anyway, Bill and Andrew go home Tuesday, and after that, he can just cosleep with me until it's time to go home.)
Of course, now that I'm trying to think about what else there is to talk about for Tampa... I really don't have much to add. Andrew and Bill had all the fun; Charlie and I just hung out at the hotel. (Can you describe caring for a newborn as "fun"? Maybe not, but it was certainly nice; newborns who sleep a lot are pretty easy.) We went to the pediatrician's on Thursday, and afterwards I went to a nearby consignment shop because there was a coupon that I picked up at the doctor's. (It was a good shop, too, I found a used Moby wrap which will be super helpful for the plane trip back, plus shorts for Andrew because in Bill's rush to get on a plane, he packed only one pair, and three pairs of pants, and it's in the 80s here. I don't mind buying the shorts; Andrew's inventory is low anyway. Which is partially why Bill ended up packing so many pants!)
I was a bit bad, though . You don't really see the teeny tiny babies in public - with reason, of course - and anytime someone sees him, their mouths go all soft and they coo and sign about tiny babies, and I've had numerous people tell me variations of "Oh I want another" and "Enjoy these days they grow up so fast". But of course, I know the moment Charlie and I are gone, I'm sure they turn to each other and say, "Goodness, why is she taking him outside this early?" I know this, because I've done the same thing. And mostly, I'd agree with them - but then, there are six pairs of long pants for Andrew, and it's 80 degrees outside, and Charles is sleeping in his carrier, and the consignment store is right there, and there is your answer. As needs must, and all that.
*
I have started and stopped this entry so often that it's now the next day, and I can hear Charlie beginning to wake up. And the entry is an absolutely mess, and I should be good and try to organize it a bit better, but I think you'd all rather have a picture of Charlie instead.
Today, Andrew and I go to Disney. Or he goes to the children's museum with his dad. We're letting him decide. He decided last night around 9:30 that he was done with Disney, and he really really really wants to play in the heated outdoor pool downstairs, and frankly, I'm inclined to let him. We have tomorrow too - they don't fly until evening.