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10 Easy Ways to turn a Disagreement into a Full-Fledged Fight
1. Change your msn title to something insulting your adversary; refer to him as a jerk, for instance.
2. Discuss the problem with your friends list before you talk to your adversary about it. Pretend your adversary isn't ALSO on your friends list.
3. Doubt your adversary's motives at every turn; clearly if he's apologizing profusely he must truly hate your guts (-_-)
4. When neutral parties back up your adversary's motives, doubt them as well. The fact they're just about the only person on earth trying to have a better relationship with you is totally irrelevant at this point.
5. More apologies? Keep doubting! Tell them they don't care about you; clearly you know better than them what's going on in their head.
6. Then when your adversary gets fed up with the bullshit of points 1 through 5 and says the fight has gotten childish and ridiculous, blast him some more! He's clearly wrong; the disagreement has been nothing but civil and well articulated thus far (-_-)
7. Make sure you put down the other's arguing skills, lest he realize you yourself have none.
8. Don't make any concessions unless you really have to, and even then make sure there's a "but" at the end of it, so that the other party doesn't get the impression you're actually trying to be the bigger man. That brings us to our next point.
9. Under no circumstances should you be the bigger man. Early attempts to nip the problem in the bud by your foe were definitely not his attempts at being the better man; god no, he's far too evil for that.
10. Now that you've completely alienated another handful of people, spend all your time in your room moping and sulking on LJ about how none of your friends want to spend time with you anymore and how everyone always abandons you. Ignore the fact that the consistent factor in all your failed friendships is you.
1. Change your msn title to something insulting your adversary; refer to him as a jerk, for instance.
2. Discuss the problem with your friends list before you talk to your adversary about it. Pretend your adversary isn't ALSO on your friends list.
3. Doubt your adversary's motives at every turn; clearly if he's apologizing profusely he must truly hate your guts (-_-)
4. When neutral parties back up your adversary's motives, doubt them as well. The fact they're just about the only person on earth trying to have a better relationship with you is totally irrelevant at this point.
5. More apologies? Keep doubting! Tell them they don't care about you; clearly you know better than them what's going on in their head.
6. Then when your adversary gets fed up with the bullshit of points 1 through 5 and says the fight has gotten childish and ridiculous, blast him some more! He's clearly wrong; the disagreement has been nothing but civil and well articulated thus far (-_-)
7. Make sure you put down the other's arguing skills, lest he realize you yourself have none.
8. Don't make any concessions unless you really have to, and even then make sure there's a "but" at the end of it, so that the other party doesn't get the impression you're actually trying to be the bigger man. That brings us to our next point.
9. Under no circumstances should you be the bigger man. Early attempts to nip the problem in the bud by your foe were definitely not his attempts at being the better man; god no, he's far too evil for that.
10. Now that you've completely alienated another handful of people, spend all your time in your room moping and sulking on LJ about how none of your friends want to spend time with you anymore and how everyone always abandons you. Ignore the fact that the consistent factor in all your failed friendships is you.