*Warning may contain aweome*
On the 4Tst of month the Hello Kitty Toaster fatefully passed away after months of ineffective toasting. We had refused to buy a new toaster believe that our dear friend of many toasts would ever leave this world. Sadly with only one, marginally, operational toasting slot it was time for our dear friend to be relegated to the top left corner of my wardrobe.
Born of the unholy union between Cthulhu and a Breville sandwich maker, the demon spawn toaster was rightly heralded by many ancient civilizations as a terrible bringer of doom and suffering. Often breaking rank during battle to destroy countless battalions single handedly, simply to feed off the life energy it so greedily coveted. Seemingly surrounded by an aura of fear and terror, the Hello Kitty Toaster was by all means untouchable, until it short-circuited on a piece of sultana from a raisin muffin whilst sacking Rome.
The gathered souls of previous conquests allowed the Hello Kitty Toaster to claw it's way back from the abyssal Tartarus, the brief sojourn to hell had severely altered its will to dominate and enslave. Wishing to right the evils comitted in its previous life, the Hello Kitty Toaster pledged to devote this incarnation to the servitude of justice.
This decision led many to believe it was a bit gay.
Crustum Anatomie
The frontal photograph displays many attributes
The happy pink logos help you remember your lord and master
The browning knob (snigger) allows you control the number of browns
There is a row of buttons, they have text, some have lights
If you squint really hard and then look at the underside of a cat they kind of look like nipples
New Zealanders take note: that says "breads" that's called a plural
proppa 'nunciation and gramma yo
Ready to pounce, like they do
the Hello Kitty Toater, reclining in its natural habitat
Born of the unholy union between Cthulhu and a Breville sandwich maker, the demon spawn toaster was rightly heralded by many ancient civilizations as a terrible bringer of doom and suffering. Often breaking rank during battle to destroy countless battalions single handedly, simply to feed off the life energy it so greedily coveted. Seemingly surrounded by an aura of fear and terror, the Hello Kitty Toaster was by all means untouchable, until it short-circuited on a piece of sultana from a raisin muffin whilst sacking Rome.
The gathered souls of previous conquests allowed the Hello Kitty Toaster to claw it's way back from the abyssal Tartarus, the brief sojourn to hell had severely altered its will to dominate and enslave. Wishing to right the evils comitted in its previous life, the Hello Kitty Toaster pledged to devote this incarnation to the servitude of justice.
This decision led many to believe it was a bit gay.
Crustum Anatomie
The frontal photograph displays many attributes
The happy pink logos help you remember your lord and master
The browning knob (snigger) allows you control the number of browns
There is a row of buttons, they have text, some have lights
If you squint really hard and then look at the underside of a cat they kind of look like nipples
New Zealanders take note: that says "breads" that's called a plural
proppa 'nunciation and gramma yo
Ready to pounce, like they do
the Hello Kitty Toater, reclining in its natural habitat