Heeb Hop!!! J-J-J-Jew Unit!

Aug 04, 2004 17:54


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I guess. aznjim August 5 2004, 02:09:59 UTC
That just seems like a boring way to view life. I kind of think "Wow I should stop drinking and doing drugs..." but I figure it's okay because it's just a little slice of happiness. However, shouldn't there be more? Shouldn't I be looking for some greater meaning?

You know in the end I guess you just have to find something you like doing and get paid for it for the rest of your life. I think about my mother and father and the paths that they have taken in their life. My dad views work as something he does to fund all the other stuff he likes doing. He hates his job but views it as the means to do what he likes in the times he's not at work. My mom on the other hand loves her job but complains that she doesn't have enough time to do anything else.

What do I want to do? Who knows... I'd like to be rich and not ever have to work -- maybe continue going to school? I've met those people who are permanent students. It's a sad too. Like, "Come on loser, can't you find something else to do?"

I think about your happiness statement in a way one of my philosophy professors told me. Imagine your soul as an empty bucket with holes and what you fill it with is happiness. Well, you'd want to make sure to keep your bucket full even though happiness constantly is draining out. He said, "In the end, the person who would win in life would be the person with the biggest holes in their bucket." It's funny how he tied suffering to happiness. Almost like one couldn't exist without the other. I guess I should live my life looking forward to winning all the small battles without looking at the big war of life. I just think that one day, when I'm about to die and I'm lying on my death bed I won't really care about how many times I busted a nut, or ate a chocolate chip cookies -- instead there has to be goals and aspirations that I must achieve to feel like I've lived my life in a way that doesn't feel like I wasted my only opportunity in this physical existence.

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