Nov 03, 2004 17:35
today was so fucked up, except maireads birthday.
feeling numb. i knew this was coming, and now that its here, im doing everything i can to avoid it. i cant concentrate. drowning myelf in music, and for once, it does nothing. nothing can help me. nothing can help her. i can only blame myself, even with the knowledge that it's not my fault. death is beautiful. death is the cure, but death is not the answer.