Marry Me Murakami
How do I make Murakami my wife? This is the question I pose to all, sundry and misc.
So, like, I couldn't sleep last night, and decided to read a couple of chapters of Sputnik Sweetheart, which predictably resulted in me finishing it off. It was really nice actually, I haven't been in the mood to read for ages for some reason, and had kinda ambled my way through the first third of Sputnik Sweetheart over a month or two. Then last night, maybe because I was feeling a bit grim (a combination of being unable to sleep and it being a Sunday, which I hate with bilious fervour, is most unwelcome), I got totally absorbed into it, completely unable to put it down. I also felt the desire to write, which I haven't done for a while either. Anyway, the point is, it was amazing... He has an ability to do a thing what I phrased well pretentiously, thus: "to transcend the novelist-novel-reader paradigm and speak directly from one human to another". Sometimes he captures a feeling or explains a situation or emotion so perfectly that it makes me feel physically sick. Like it's too close to home, y'know? It's as though he's tapped into a collective psyche and can manipulate it at will... I don't know if it's the same way for everybody, but certainly for a particular type of person, which I'll venture is the flaky, over-cerebral type. Perhaps it is for everybody, I'm not trying to claim any kind of exclusivity here, I just don't know. There's a passage about unrequited love, right, and regardless of whether you yourself are in that situation, you know exactly how the narrator feels. It's such a universal experience, I imagine, that anybody could relate instantly to this passage, at least. He says the following;
"It was hard to accept that she had almost no feelings, maybe none at all, for me as a man. This hurt so bad at times it felt like someone was gouging out my guts with a knife. Still, the time I spent with her was more precious than anything. She helped me forget the undertones of loneliness in my life. She expanded the outer edges of my world, helped me draw a deep, soothing breath. Only Sumire could do that for me."
Who hasn't felt that? Or can't imagine feeling that exact way?
Another passage that really hit home with me was about the way you feel when there's something you really want to do or say to someone or whatever, but because of propriety or fear or anxiety you don't, you just leave it festering away. The way he sees it is as follows;
"Act that way and slowly but surely I will fade away. All the dawns and all the twilights will rob me, piece by piece, of myself, and before long my very life will be shaved away completely - and I would end up nothing.
Matters are as clear as crystal.
Crystal, crystal."
As far as I can tell, he's absolutely right, and puts forward his opinions in a really interesting way. He has a really unusual analogy about that last passage, comparing the character who's saying that to a "spineless little barber" (hence the "shaved away"), shaving away pieces of herself and burying them in the garden to keep anyone from knowing about them. Who thinks to express things like that? And yet it works beautifully.
Much as I agree with him, I'm not sure I'm a strong enough person actually to take what he says and apply it to my own life. I'm a spineless little barber, perhaps the most spineless and little, and will remain so for a while I imagine. Maybe one day though it'll sink in enough for me to be ok :P
Anyway, I'm kinda just rambling now, read the book and that init. I warn you, it's a bit rainy-faced at times, but stick with it, it's wonderful :)
Oh also, it's about a lesbian. Woop.
xxx
So, like, I couldn't sleep last night, and decided to read a couple of chapters of Sputnik Sweetheart, which predictably resulted in me finishing it off. It was really nice actually, I haven't been in the mood to read for ages for some reason, and had kinda ambled my way through the first third of Sputnik Sweetheart over a month or two. Then last night, maybe because I was feeling a bit grim (a combination of being unable to sleep and it being a Sunday, which I hate with bilious fervour, is most unwelcome), I got totally absorbed into it, completely unable to put it down. I also felt the desire to write, which I haven't done for a while either. Anyway, the point is, it was amazing... He has an ability to do a thing what I phrased well pretentiously, thus: "to transcend the novelist-novel-reader paradigm and speak directly from one human to another". Sometimes he captures a feeling or explains a situation or emotion so perfectly that it makes me feel physically sick. Like it's too close to home, y'know? It's as though he's tapped into a collective psyche and can manipulate it at will... I don't know if it's the same way for everybody, but certainly for a particular type of person, which I'll venture is the flaky, over-cerebral type. Perhaps it is for everybody, I'm not trying to claim any kind of exclusivity here, I just don't know. There's a passage about unrequited love, right, and regardless of whether you yourself are in that situation, you know exactly how the narrator feels. It's such a universal experience, I imagine, that anybody could relate instantly to this passage, at least. He says the following;
"It was hard to accept that she had almost no feelings, maybe none at all, for me as a man. This hurt so bad at times it felt like someone was gouging out my guts with a knife. Still, the time I spent with her was more precious than anything. She helped me forget the undertones of loneliness in my life. She expanded the outer edges of my world, helped me draw a deep, soothing breath. Only Sumire could do that for me."
Who hasn't felt that? Or can't imagine feeling that exact way?
Another passage that really hit home with me was about the way you feel when there's something you really want to do or say to someone or whatever, but because of propriety or fear or anxiety you don't, you just leave it festering away. The way he sees it is as follows;
"Act that way and slowly but surely I will fade away. All the dawns and all the twilights will rob me, piece by piece, of myself, and before long my very life will be shaved away completely - and I would end up nothing.
Matters are as clear as crystal.
Crystal, crystal."
As far as I can tell, he's absolutely right, and puts forward his opinions in a really interesting way. He has a really unusual analogy about that last passage, comparing the character who's saying that to a "spineless little barber" (hence the "shaved away"), shaving away pieces of herself and burying them in the garden to keep anyone from knowing about them. Who thinks to express things like that? And yet it works beautifully.
Much as I agree with him, I'm not sure I'm a strong enough person actually to take what he says and apply it to my own life. I'm a spineless little barber, perhaps the most spineless and little, and will remain so for a while I imagine. Maybe one day though it'll sink in enough for me to be ok :P
Anyway, I'm kinda just rambling now, read the book and that init. I warn you, it's a bit rainy-faced at times, but stick with it, it's wonderful :)
Oh also, it's about a lesbian. Woop.
xxx