I hate the fact that I know I'm right this time.
Before I said that I only had 1 regret in life, and that was the accident. Well, I've realized, I have two regrets.
Whats the second? The first 3 months of this year.
I regret falling for him, I regret spending every weekend with him, and I regret giving him everything I had to offer.
As happy as I was at the time, what do I have to show for that? Nothing.
I convinced myself that because we fucked, and because we were talking again that maybe there was a chance. But now I realize that I'm just an idiot.
Sure, I love him with all my heart, I love spending time with him, talking, being close...but what does any of it matter if nothing will come from it?
I'm not angry at him, its my own damn fault that I let it happen. And now that I can see this, I'm done.
No more failed attempts at calling him, no more unanswered IM's, no more visits. I get the point. If he actually wants to talk to me, he can get a hold of me. But I'm sick of trying to talk to him. I'm just fucking over it...
I hope.
The Crimson - Atreyu
i feel it well up inside
and robert smith lied, boys do cry
and with blood tears in my eyes
i'm an anne rice novel come to life
i cant hide the monster anymore
one can only feel desolate for so long
until one starts to change into something
the mirror doesnt recognize
i metamorphosize
the darkness has been biding its time
to claim its latest victim
fresh meat for carnal desires
to become wut i became
i viewed the sun for the last time
will u still hold me
when you see what i have done?
will u still kiss me the same
when you taste my victims blood?
so crimson and red
i feel it flowing fromm your lips
crimson and red
My heart is dead and so are you
and it pulses through, the desire to change
to deconstruct all of my past failings
but where to begin
because when you live is sin
its hard to look at the saints
without them reflecting their jet black auras back on you
and all i have is hope
my inner burn's not fading
ill wipe the blood from my cheek and get on with my day
and all i have is hope
and all i need is time
to bury in pine under six feet of time
the lies i told me about myslef
claw my way out, pick the splinters from under my fingernails
i wont loose hope, i wont give in
just live and breathe, try not to die again(x3)
my heart is dead, and so are you!!
Whats the second? The first 3 months of this year.
I regret falling for him, I regret spending every weekend with him, and I regret giving him everything I had to offer.
As happy as I was at the time, what do I have to show for that? Nothing.
I convinced myself that because we fucked, and because we were talking again that maybe there was a chance. But now I realize that I'm just an idiot.
Sure, I love him with all my heart, I love spending time with him, talking, being close...but what does any of it matter if nothing will come from it?
I'm not angry at him, its my own damn fault that I let it happen. And now that I can see this, I'm done.
No more failed attempts at calling him, no more unanswered IM's, no more visits. I get the point. If he actually wants to talk to me, he can get a hold of me. But I'm sick of trying to talk to him. I'm just fucking over it...
I hope.
The Crimson - Atreyu
i feel it well up inside
and robert smith lied, boys do cry
and with blood tears in my eyes
i'm an anne rice novel come to life
i cant hide the monster anymore
one can only feel desolate for so long
until one starts to change into something
the mirror doesnt recognize
i metamorphosize
the darkness has been biding its time
to claim its latest victim
fresh meat for carnal desires
to become wut i became
i viewed the sun for the last time
will u still hold me
when you see what i have done?
will u still kiss me the same
when you taste my victims blood?
so crimson and red
i feel it flowing fromm your lips
crimson and red
My heart is dead and so are you
and it pulses through, the desire to change
to deconstruct all of my past failings
but where to begin
because when you live is sin
its hard to look at the saints
without them reflecting their jet black auras back on you
and all i have is hope
my inner burn's not fading
ill wipe the blood from my cheek and get on with my day
and all i have is hope
and all i need is time
to bury in pine under six feet of time
the lies i told me about myslef
claw my way out, pick the splinters from under my fingernails
i wont loose hope, i wont give in
just live and breathe, try not to die again(x3)
my heart is dead, and so are you!!