Griffin
The world is a strange small place. I managed to make contact with somebody who knew my brother. It was on an FB forum about the horrible town I grew up in. they had started an RIP thread and somebody remembered him. What a shock. That in other places wandering around on the surface of the earth are other people with memories of a brother that I barely knew. Somehow it always seemed as though we three were the only ones in the universe that knew him, remembered him, ever thought about him. And now I have one more fragment...she said they were both in the ag program in high school, described him as a big teddybear that smiled all the time and that they were good freinds. Nice. My memories are terribly fragmented. By the time I was 6 he was 18 and had moved on. None of it ever made sense to me.
So last night I had another ptsd episode in steves arms. He just listened, and that made all the difference because I havent had anyone to talk to about this for 27 years. Its not something my parents discuss, just the dead elephant in the room that everyone steps aroung and holds their nose politely. The one thing steve said is that at some point soon, im going to have to talk to my father about all this. There is too much hurt and confusion and I need answers.
So last night I had another ptsd episode in steves arms. He just listened, and that made all the difference because I havent had anyone to talk to about this for 27 years. Its not something my parents discuss, just the dead elephant in the room that everyone steps aroung and holds their nose politely. The one thing steve said is that at some point soon, im going to have to talk to my father about all this. There is too much hurt and confusion and I need answers.