Last Christmas
Title: Last Christmas
Rating: PG
Pairing: 2Min
Summary: Last Christmas, Taemin gave his heart to someone he truly thought he loved. He was rejected harshly. Minho, who silently loves Taemin, is discouraged when he sees that person is not him.This year, Taemin intends on giving his heart to someone special; someone who won't make him cry. But will Minho have the courage to confess his own feelings?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“And Heechul-sunbae is going to be there?” Taemin asked with wide eyes, hoping that Key wasn’t just trying to trick him into going to this Christmas party that the school was hosting.
“I swear to you.” Key held up his right hand to prove his honesty. “And all of our friends are going too. You have no reason not to go, Taemin-ah.” He ruffled his dongsaeng’s hair.
“Mmph…” Taemin hunched over. “I don’t know…”
“…Maybe this is your chance.” The older smiled. “You can finally tell Heechul-sunbae how you feel.”
Taemin gasped. “H-hyung! I don’t think I can do that!”
Key nodded. “Sure you can.” He knew how much Taemin liked the upperclassman even though the older didn’t seem to know that he existed. Their all-boys boarding school wasn’t very big, yet Taemin’s existence still seemed to elude Heechul.
“And how am I supposed to do that? Just go up to him in a crowded room full of people I don’t know and confess!?” Taemin asked sarcastically.
“Well, yeah.” Key laughed.
“…You’re insane!” Taemin shouted.
Key laid back and sighed happily. “Well when else are you going to have a chance? He’s graduating in June.”
Taemin turned back to his untouched homework assignment and wondered. Even though he was only a freshman at this school, he’d developed a very strong crush on Kim Heechul; a super popular, handsome, and funny senior.
It was a completely random happenstance of fate that Taemin met Heechul. First, Key, a sophomore, ended up being his roommate. Then Key introduced Taemin to his friends Jonghyun (a junior), Jinki (also a junior), and Minho (a sophomore) who happened to be playing soccer with Heechul and a few other people he didn’t remember now.
From that day, he couldn’t seem to stop thinking about Heechul. He saw him everywhere; in the halls between classes, on the courtyards, in his dreams…
A knock on their door pulled him from his thoughts. “I’ll get it.” Key stretched his limbs as he got up from his bed.
Feeling somber, Taemin leaned his chin onto his open palm and ignored whoever was visiting.
“Annyeong~” It was Minho.
“Yo,” Key flopped back onto his bed.
“I just came to hang out.” Minho sat on Taemin’s bed and yawned. “I can’t study anymore tonight…”
“I know the feeling…” Key’s voice was muffled from his face stuffed in pillow.
“At least we have that party next weekend.” Minho sighed. “That should be fun, right Taemin-ah?”
Taemin cringed; he wasn’t sure how fun letting his heart out was going to be. “I guess…”
Minho looked at him with worried eyes. “You okay?”
“I’m fine…” Taemin sighed.
“He’s very excited for the party.” Key teased.
“Hyung!” Taemin stood quickly and balled his fists.
Key laughed loudly. “It’s not a big deal, Tae!”
“What isn’t a big deal?” Minho didn’t have any idea what the two were talking about, but he also didn’t like seeing Taemin upset.
“Nothing!” Taemin’s face was deep red and he stormed out of their shared room in a hurry, embarrassed.
“Wait dongsaeng!” Minho got up without a second thought, following him out into the hall without even putting his shoes on first.
Taemin froze in the middle of the hall, his arms stiff at his sides. He felt like Key was making fun of him and in front of Minho no less, someone he considered a good friend.
“What’s wrong tonight?” Minho caught up with him and stood close, wanting so badly just to hold him. “Is it something I said?”
“Aniyo…” Taemin sniffled. “There’s just something Key-hyung and I were talking about that has me a little worried is all…” He still stood facing away from Minho, not wanting to show his wet eyes.
Minho smiled a little and wrapped his arms around Taemin, pulling him into a warm back hug. “Whatever it is, don’t worry. I’m sure everything will work out just fine.” He forced himself not to nuzzle his cheek against the younger’s soft hair.
“Hyung…?” Taemin lost his breath; he wasn’t used to being held like this and it made him feel a little shy.
“And I’m glad that you’re coming to the Christmas party.” Minho smiled again. “It wouldn’t be the same without you.” He let go of Taemin slowly and went back to the room only to grab his shoes before heading back to his own dorm room. He bowed his head and whispered ‘goodnight’ as he passed Taemin in the hall again.
~*~
Minho spent the entire Saturday before the party to go out and look for a present for Taemin. Sure, he could have gotten the first thing he saw, but it wasn’t what Taemin deserved. Minho wanted to get him the best, most meaningful and most special gift that he could afford.
Minho was in love with Taemin.
He remembers too fondly the first day he met Taemin. Minho and Key were roommates during their freshman year, but Key had a new roommate this year; a cute, shy freshman named Lee Taemin. The red-head wasn’t very talkative at first but as time went on Minho became Taemin’s protective hyung, a friendship that he cherished above all others.
But he kept his feelings to himself. Not because he was shy or afraid, but because he didn’t want to burden Taemin with them. He was perfectly content with being his close friend until the right time came for them. He was hoping that this Christmas party was the perfect opportunity to confess his feelings.
He just needed the right gift to go along with his confession.
“Ah,” A small kiosk with hanging glass charms caught his attention as he walked. A small old man smiled at him when he stopped to take a closer look.
“I make them all myself.” The man explained. “If there’s something here you don’t see, I’d be happy to make one for you.”
Minho bowed respectfully and inspected the small charms individually. There were cute animals, fruits, words, hearts, and even abstract designs. “I think I would like a custom one, sir.”
“Oh?” The old man shuffled over. “What can I make you?”
“It’s a Christmas present, so can it be ready by tomorrow afternoon?” Minho worried suddenly, not considering the time constraint of the party being tomorrow night.
“I can do it as you wait here. It won’t take ten minutes.” The man gestured toward his glass-blowing tools behind protective Plexiglas. “You can even watch.” He pulled a small sketchpad from his pocket and looked to Minho for instructions.
“Oh, perfect then!” Minho smiled. “Can you make a dolphin?” He knew the younger loved the ocean and swimming; a dolphin just seemed to fit him. “And have it… well, I’m not sure if I’m describing it right… but can it be jumping over a heart?”
The man nodded and sketched as he listened. “Something like this?” The dolphin, not bigger than the size of a coin, was elegantly detailed and nestled under its front fin was a big, red heart.
“That’s great! Wow, that’s really perfect!” Minho nearly jumped.
“And what will this be strung on? A necklace? Bracelet?” The man confirmed one last detail.
“…A necklace. Definitely.” Minho imagined the pretty charm around Taemin’s neck and felt a sense of pride rush through him. To see it there every day would make his heart swell tremendously.
About ten minutes later, just as the man promised, the charm was finished. “Here we are.” The man strung a pretty silver chain into the loop and put the finished jewelry into a small, padded gift box.
“It looks better than I imagined… thank you so much!” Minho bowed deeply. This was the perfect present for Taemin and it was made especially for him. It was one of a kind, just like him. “What do I owe you?” He meant in terms of payment.
“Hmm, you know what? It’s on me.” The wrinkles around the old man’s eyes were more prominent when he smiled. “I can tell that this gift is for someone special.”
Minho blushed. “A-ani… I can’t walk away without paying for this…”
“Consider it a Christmas gift from me.” The man pat Minho’s shoulder.
“Ani ani,” Minho dug into his pockets and took out a $20. “Please take this, at least.”
The old man nodded and took the money without any more argument. “Your father raised you to be a gentleman.”
“Merry Christmas, sir.”
“You as well, son.”
~*~
Minho gripped Taemin’s present in his hand, elegantly wrapped in gold paper with a green ribbon holding it closed. He stood in the corner of the school’s large banquet room, simply watching the people pour in with their parents, dates, and friends. He watched Taemin too. The boy seemed nervous. Not as nervous as me Minho thought. Could it be that Taemin sensed what Minho was going to do? No, that’s not possible. Then again, their eyes kept meeting, and every single time, Minho looked away as quickly as possible with the most obvious blush on his face. Stupid… Calm down! He scolded himself.
“Hey Minho.” Key nudged him in the side, surprising him.
“YAH!” He nearly yelled as he tried to stuff the present into his suit jacket. “Don’t sneak up on a person like that!”
“Sheesh!” Key laughed. “What’s got you so jumpy?”
“Nothing!” He stammered. His eyes were locked to the other side of the room where Taemin stood anxiously.
“I’m waiting for Taemin.” Key said, folding his arms.
“Hmm?” Minho looked at him.
Key side-eyed him and smirked. “He has something to say.”
Minho felt his heart skip. His skin even began to heat when he looked back to Taemin and saw him walking closer. Could it be? Did he feel the same way? He stood straighter and cleared his throat. “Hey, Taemin.”
“Annyeong,” Taemin gave a shy smile.
“Hey um,” Minho laughed to ease his nerves. “I was hoping to talk to you about something. Also I got you a pres−”
“Can you hold on a minute, hyung?” Taemin kept walking right past Minho. He was too lost in his own daze to even notice what the older had said. His eyes were focused on Heechul.
“Huh?” Minho spun around to watch where Taemin was going.
“Heechul-sunbae…” Taemin began, standing directly in front of him with a hopeful smile.
“Heechul?” Minho’s eyes darted nervously and they began to sting.
“Hmm? Who are you?” Heechul asked, mad to be interrupted from his conversation with his classmates.
“Ah, sorry! My name is Lee Taemin!” He bowed and came back up clutching his collar. “I know you don’t really know me, but I’ve liked you for a long time.” He smiled so innocently. “I wanted to confess my feelings properly to you, so I finally got the courage.” His red cheeks only added to his beauty. “I found the courage just for you, sunbae.” He reached for Heechul’s hand and held it in his own. “I love you.”
Minho heard the words. I love you. He collapsed back against the wall and held his forehead. “No…” It wasn’t supposed to be like this.
Heechul looked down at the young freshman and chuckled. “Is this a joke?” He yanked his hand back from the younger’s grasp.
“A joke?” Taemin’s eyes widened. “N-no, sunbae… I really do love you.” He pursed his lips and hung his head, afraid he might start crying.
Heechul burst into more laughter and flicked Taemin’s forehead. “Get out of here, kid. I don’t even know you.” He rolled his eyes. “Stop with this ‘I love you’ shit. I’m not interested.”
Minho wanted nothing more than to take Taemin away from that situation. He himself felt crushed that Taemin didn’t return his feelings, but moreso didn’t want to see Taemin heartbroken. That hurt him even more.
Taemin was shaking now, trying his best to hold back hysterical tears. “I’m sorry then, sunbae! I won’t bother you ever again, I promise!” Without even looking up, he ran away. He ran from the banquet hall whimpering softly and as quickly as his shaking legs would let him.
“Oh no…” Key bit his lip. “That went horribly…”
“Taemin!” Minho ran after him without a second thought. He wasn’t trying to be selfish and use this moment to force his feelings onto the vulnerable Taemin, he just wouldn’t feel right leaving his friend alone in this moment.
“I’m so stupid!” Taemin sunk to the floor just outside of the room. “I should have known!”
“Taemin…” Minho dropped to his knees right in front of him and pulled him into a hug. “You’re not stupid. Don’t say that.” He locked his fingers in the younger’s hair and held him tightly.
Taemin spoke through his sobs. “Hyung, you don’t have to−”
“I know.” Minho spoke quietly. “Just cry if you have to. I’ll cry with you if that’s what you need.” He pulled the younger onto his lap and vowed to be strong; this was Taemin’s moment to be sad, not his.
“Hyung,” Taemin hid his face in Minho’s chest and cried, completely heartbroken over his rejection. “You’re a really good hyung, Minho.”
“And you’re a good dongsaeng.” He stroked the back of Taemin’s head to soothe him. “The best.” He whispered and closed his eyes, enjoying the warmth of their closeness.
After about forty-five minutes, Minho picked Taemin up just as he was in his arms and carried him back upstairs to the dorms. He had lost energy some time ago from crying and Minho brought him up to bed once he quieted to a soft whimper.
Luckily, none of them ever locked their dorms rooms before everyone went to sleep. He was able to put Taemin in his bed without seeming to wake him. He removed his shoes and suit jacket, and then pulled the blanket over him. “I’m sorry that this happened to you, Taemin-ah…”
The younger gave a tiny, desperate whimper. His eyes could barely blink open because his eyelids were so red and swollen, still wet from tears. “Mm,” He gave a small gesture to Minho meaning thank you before closing his eyes and drifting to sleep.
Minho waited a few minutes before getting up to leave. He stood in the doorway and just watched Taemin for a second, making sure he was sleeping soundly. He didn’t want to leave Taemin alone for any reason, but it was time to sleep…
~*~
Back in his room, Minho climbed into his bed and hid under his sheets. He knew he’d be alone for a while; Jonghyun and Onew weren’t ones to come back to the dorm before midnight, especially when there were parties. The red glow from the clock in the room reminded him how early it was: 9:46pm. He was completely exhausted though. His chest felt extremely heavy and made it hard for him to breathe. While he felt sad for Taemin, he was beginning to feel sad for himself. He felt in his pocket for the tiny present he intended to give to him tonight and put it on his nightstand.
He told himself over and over that he should have known; he shouldn’t have just expected to be able to go right up to Taemin and assume that he would have felt the same way. It’s not like Taemin outright rejected him, but knowing that he felt about Heechul how Minho wished he’d felt about him was heartbreaking in itself. And why Heechul? That big-headed jerk didn’t deserve a second of Taemin’s attention.
It’s not like he ever made any sort of effort to show Taemin how much he cared. Sure, he took care of him as a hyung, but anyone would see that as simply friendship. He had absolutely no courage to confront Taemin now, nor did he think it was appropriate to seeing as Taemin was in a pretty bad emotional state. And honestly, he probably would be for a while. All that crying…
Minho touched the shoulder of his shirt; it was still wet from Taemin’s tears. If there was anything in his life that he never wanted to see, it was Taemin crying. All he could do was cradle the younger as he spilled his very heart out of him. It took so much energy from Minho to listen to him cry for so long. All he could do was listen and rub his back and keep him warm. Even now he wanted to be with Taemin to make sure he was going to be okay…
10:24pm now. Had he really been just laying here for the past 45 minutes? His limbs felt disconnected and his head pounded; he needed to sleep. Before closing his eyes, he tucked the wrapped present in his nightstand’s drawer. It would have to wait to be opened until next year…
~*~
Despite not sleeping very well, Minho slept until 10:00am or so. Before he even woke up, Taemin had already left to go home for New Year’s break. Key said that he had called his parents for him because he knew the younger wouldn’t want to hang around. “Once the New Year comes, he’ll feel much better.” Key assured their group of friends with a certain nod. “He just needs to be alone.”
It would only be a week and a half, but Minho made himself physically sick worrying about Taemin. Was he eating enough? How about sleep; did he get adequate rest? He hoped that his immune system wasn’t weakened by this… a nasty flu was going around.
Luckily Taemin called Key after five days to check in. Apparently he missed everyone and wanted to say hello. Minho didn’t ask to speak to him, he was just happy knowing that his spirit was high enough to function properly.
Taemin returned looking healthy enough, but his usual bubbliness was noticeably suppressed. He smiled and laughed, but they were forced; his face didn’t shine like it used to. His eyes lacked that familiar glow that Minho fell in love with. Whenever he tried to mention even a hint of bringing up that issue, Taemin dismissed it as fatigue or hunger or some other nonsense excuse Minho could see right through.
He kept his distance, though, remaining as a hyung and nothing deeper. The first half of January passed quickly and classes resumed session again.
~*~
Before lunch, Minho liked to shoot some hoops to release some extra energy. On a Friday, he grabbed a ball from the locker room, changed from school shoes to gym sneakers, and began to dribble on the newly polished floor.
He couldn’t help but notice Heechul and a few of his friends sitting on the first row of the bleachers, probably skipping class, and blabbing loudly.
“You should have seen him, he was about to cry!” Heechul laughed.
“He honestly tried to tell you that he was in love with you?” One friend with badly-dyed blond hair didn’t believe him.
Minho stopped dribbling the ball and listened closely. Were they talking about Taemin?
“Yeah! It was pathetic… He’s so small that I could barely hear him.”
“Yah!” Minho had had enough. He threw the basketball across the court and walked straight up to Heechul. Even though Heechul was three years older, they were already the same height. “What the hell were you just saying?”
Heechul jerked back. “Minho? What are you d−”
“Answer me!” He fisted Heechul’s collar impatiently.
“I-I was just talking about that freshman kid…” He looked to his friends and wondered why no one was coming to his aid. “You saw him, the dorky one who tried to tell me that he liked me.”
Minho snarled and roughly pushed the older to the wall. “He’s not a dork! Don’t you ever say that about him!” He was yelling much louder than he intended.
While walking to lunch, Taemin passed the gymnasium and heard the yelling. “Hmm?” He walked closer to the open doorways and peeked inside.
“Hey, it’s not a big deal.” Heechul tried to shimmy out of Minho’s grasp. “He’s just a kid with some weird feelings. He’ll get over it.”
Minho was fuming; get over it? “How can you be so insensitive?” He felt tears well up in his eyes and his throat choked up. “You destroyed him!” His fingertips dug into Heechul’s neck. “You… you need to apologize!”
Taemin brought his hands up to cover his mouth and gasped; was Minho standing up for him? Part of him wanted to run in between them fearing there’d be a fight, but he felt like he’d be disrespecting Minho. After all, his hyung had done so much for him… He was torn.
“Apologize?” Heechul chuckled. “Stop bringing up a dead subject, hubae. I gave him my response already.” He managed to finally push Minho away from him and the group promptly made their way in the opposite direction.
Minho fell to his knees and ran his hands through his hair. “Damnit…”
Taemin’s feet automatically started running towards Minho but he forcefully stopped himself. He had already caused the older so much of a burden, trying to talk to him now would just make his shoulders heavier with his problems. He turned around and with a soft voice whispered ‘thank you hyung…’ before running off to the cafeteria.
~*~
“Why’re you so late?” Jonghyun questioned when Minho finally got to the cafeteria. “Lunch is just about over.”
“I don’t care.” He huffed, randomly fluffing his hair in a poor attempt to fix it. “Not hungry.”
“More for me!” Onew laughed and bit into the last piece of his sandwich. “Can I use your lunch card?”
“No!” Minho yelled.
“What’s got you so pissed off?” Key raised his eyebrow.
Taemin glanced at him shyly but kept his mouth shut; he didn’t want to admit what he saw, even if he did think it was rather sweet of him to do…
“Nothing, okay? Just aggravated. Drop it.” Minho put his head down on the table and sighed.
“Don’t pester him.” Taemin said quietly.
Minho looked up at Taemin. “Hmm?” He was almost surprised.
All Taemin did was give a gentle smile in response, but it was the purest, most genuine smile Minho had seen in a while from him.
“Alright, it’s time for next period anyway.” Key dragged the two older boys from their precious food and out into the halls.
“Hyung,” Taemin stayed beside Minho and away from the other three as they walked. “I saw you in the gym…”
Minho clenched his jaw; he was pretty sure that he didn’t just mean he saw him playing basketball.
“Thanks for sticking up for me in front of Heechul-sunbae…” He lowered his eyes shyly when he mentioned the senior’s name. “It was really nice of you…”
Minho blushed and darted his eyes away. “No problem…” He mumbled.
“And I never thanked you for that night, either.” Taemin added. He tangled his fingers together behind him and smiled. “You held me until I fell asleep…”
“…I wasn’t going to let you be alone after something like that happened.” Minho said it as if it were the only logical excuse.
“Well,” Taemin smiled. “It meant a lot to me.” His voice was softer than satin and sweeter than milk to the older. “So thank you.” He stopped and turned to face him just outside of his next class and suddenly wrapped his arms around Minho’s waist.
Minho’s body completely froze. Lee Taemin, the object of his affection, was hugging him. Before he could react, the younger squeezed tighter and gently nuzzled his cheek on Minho’s chest before pulling away.
“See you later, Minho-hyung.” He smiled again, but much bigger this time. His eyes even scrunched a little bit. He turned and entered the classroom in what seemed like slow motion to Minho, complete with imagined singing birds and dream-like sparkles emanating around him.
He was so completely, deeply, genuinely in love with Lee Taemin.
~*~
The rest of the school year went on without much excitement. Heechul graduated and left and Taemin seemed relieved. He didn’t say anything, but Minho could tell that he held his head just a bit higher afterwards. Nobody asked how Taemin was feeling about the situation; was he over it? Was he still hurting? Not even Minho was sure if he wanted to know. He and Taemin had a good relationship; they hung out often and enjoyed each other’s company as friends. If that’s all Minho was ever going to have, he was fine with that. Not completely happy, but fine.
The summer was fun. It was necessary that the boys return home for the summer but both Minho and Taemin lived in Seoul. Minho didn’t want to be intrusive to Taemin so he didn’t contact him at first to hang out, but the younger ended up asking Minho nearly every weekend to catch a movie or meet at a soccer field somewhere. They would stay out late, often past their curfews and would later have to face punishment, but the amount of laughter and happiness their time together brought was worth it.
The new school year started and the group ended up having the same roommate assignments: Key with Taemin in a regular dorm and Minho with Jonghyun and Onew in a senior suite. Key liked to complain that he deserved a room in the senior suite more than Minho since he was older and secretly Minho would have been glad to trade spots with Key if it meant being closer to Taemin.
A harsh winter struck in early November. Nearly three feet of snow kept the students at the boarding school locked away inside for the entire month. December wasn’t any better; high winds and freezing rain brought ice storms that made travelling extremely dangerous. For a while it was uncertain whether or not the school would host the annual Christmas party, but a good week of warm sunlight allowed most of the ice to melt and the party was scheduled for Christmas Eve.
The day of the party brought nothing but anxiety for Minho. He sat on his bed staring at the small wrapped box he got last year for Taemin as it rested in his lap. Would he even like the necklace? What if he thought dolphins were stupid? Could the glass have broken by now? Should he give it anonymously? Was it still too soon to try and confess his feelings to Taemin? Was he still hurting? Could it be that Taemin only sees him as a friend? Too many what ifs were making him feel nauseous.
“Minho, you ready?” Key popped his head into their room and smiled. “Party’s starting.”
“Yeah, be there in a minute.” He got up and flattened his dress clothes then carefully placed the present in his pocket again, hoping he’d have the chance to offer it to Taemin this year.
The banquet hall was decorated almost exactly like last year; a tacky effort in Minho’s opinion. At least they could have tried to make it special… In just a few minutes he spotted Taemin. His legs felt numb when he tried to move. Damnit! Why was this happening…
Taemin looked around the room and noticed Minho; with a big, happy smile and a wave, he started walking over to him.
Oh god… Minho felt nauseous again and was pretty sure he was sweating now. He cleared his throat, at least hoping his voice wouldn’t crack when he tried to speak.
“Hi hyung!” Taemin’s eye smile made the older melt every time. “Are you hungry? They have lots of yummy appetizers over there!” He grabbed Minho’s wrist and began to pull him.
“Wait,” Minho stopped him.
“Hmm?” Taemin looked down at his wrist and then back up. “Something wrong?”
Minho shivered. “No, nothing’s wrong.” He smiled when he saw the younger smile again; it always made him feel good. “I just wanted to give you something…” With shaky hands, he removed the small wrapped box from his pocket and held it out for him. “Merry Christmas, Taemin-ah.”
Taemin’s eyes widened and then lowered a bit. “Oh hyung… I didn’t get you anything…” He pouted slightly, embarrassed.
“I don’t want anything.” He said quickly. “…Will you open it now?”
Taemin smiled and took the box. “Ne!” As if the paper were delicate goldleaf, he unfolded the seams with great care. “What is it, hyung?” He giggled before lifting the tiny lid off and gasping. “Omo…” His soft fingers grabbed the chain and lifted it slowly until the dolphin charm dangled in front of him. “I love it.” He looked right into Minho’s eyes when he said it.
“I know you like the ocean, so…” Minho commented awkwardly. “And it’s custom made… No one else in the whole world has that charm except you.”
“Wow…” Taemin’s voice wavered a bit. “It’s beautiful…” He gently stroked the glass with his fingertip. “Will you put it on for me?”
“Ne!” Minho laughed to ease his nerves and undid the tiny clasp to bring it around Taemin’s neck. In a few seconds, he sealed the clasp again and let his fingers trail down the chain until they reached the charm.
Taemin placed his hand over Minho’s and looked up at him, his eyes a little teary. “Hyung,” He let out a tiny breath, disguising a happy sob as a laugh. “I didn’t want to say this because I was afraid. After what happened last year, I was so afraid…” He stood a bit closer while clutching his charm lovingly.
“Don’t be afraid of me…” Minho put his hands on Taemin’s waist. “I won’t hurt you.”
Taemin rested his forehead on Minho’s chest and laughed again, a nervous laugh that Minho knew as a tiny cry. “Hyung, do you know how loved I felt that night you held me? When I felt like I was going to die, you still made me feel loved.”
“It’s because I love you.” Minho said easily, much more easily than he thought he would.
“Minho-hyung,” He shivered. “Please love me even more.” He wrapped his arms around Minho’s torso and smiled. “Because I love you too. You taught me how to trust people again.”
“Taemin…” Minho kissed the top of his head. “I’ve always loved you. Even when you went to Heechul-sunbae instead of me, I loved you. When you cried and told me how awful you felt, I loved you then too. It hurt me so much to see you cry, but I kept loving you.”
Taemin sniffled. “I’m sorry…”
“Ani, that’s not necessary.” Minho rocked them softly side to side. “I just want you to know that from the very first day I saw you that I’ve had it so bad for you.” They laughed together quietly.
“I wish I had known sooner…” Taemin nuzzled his cheek on Minho.
“All that matters is that you know now.” Minho smiled. “Be mine, Taemin. I’ll love you and honor you and protect you forever.”
Taemin nodded. “Then I can give you something for Christmas.”
“What’s that?” Minho smiled.
“My heart.”
Rating: PG
Pairing: 2Min
Summary: Last Christmas, Taemin gave his heart to someone he truly thought he loved. He was rejected harshly. Minho, who silently loves Taemin, is discouraged when he sees that person is not him.This year, Taemin intends on giving his heart to someone special; someone who won't make him cry. But will Minho have the courage to confess his own feelings?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“And Heechul-sunbae is going to be there?” Taemin asked with wide eyes, hoping that Key wasn’t just trying to trick him into going to this Christmas party that the school was hosting.
“I swear to you.” Key held up his right hand to prove his honesty. “And all of our friends are going too. You have no reason not to go, Taemin-ah.” He ruffled his dongsaeng’s hair.
“Mmph…” Taemin hunched over. “I don’t know…”
“…Maybe this is your chance.” The older smiled. “You can finally tell Heechul-sunbae how you feel.”
Taemin gasped. “H-hyung! I don’t think I can do that!”
Key nodded. “Sure you can.” He knew how much Taemin liked the upperclassman even though the older didn’t seem to know that he existed. Their all-boys boarding school wasn’t very big, yet Taemin’s existence still seemed to elude Heechul.
“And how am I supposed to do that? Just go up to him in a crowded room full of people I don’t know and confess!?” Taemin asked sarcastically.
“Well, yeah.” Key laughed.
“…You’re insane!” Taemin shouted.
Key laid back and sighed happily. “Well when else are you going to have a chance? He’s graduating in June.”
Taemin turned back to his untouched homework assignment and wondered. Even though he was only a freshman at this school, he’d developed a very strong crush on Kim Heechul; a super popular, handsome, and funny senior.
It was a completely random happenstance of fate that Taemin met Heechul. First, Key, a sophomore, ended up being his roommate. Then Key introduced Taemin to his friends Jonghyun (a junior), Jinki (also a junior), and Minho (a sophomore) who happened to be playing soccer with Heechul and a few other people he didn’t remember now.
From that day, he couldn’t seem to stop thinking about Heechul. He saw him everywhere; in the halls between classes, on the courtyards, in his dreams…
A knock on their door pulled him from his thoughts. “I’ll get it.” Key stretched his limbs as he got up from his bed.
Feeling somber, Taemin leaned his chin onto his open palm and ignored whoever was visiting.
“Annyeong~” It was Minho.
“Yo,” Key flopped back onto his bed.
“I just came to hang out.” Minho sat on Taemin’s bed and yawned. “I can’t study anymore tonight…”
“I know the feeling…” Key’s voice was muffled from his face stuffed in pillow.
“At least we have that party next weekend.” Minho sighed. “That should be fun, right Taemin-ah?”
Taemin cringed; he wasn’t sure how fun letting his heart out was going to be. “I guess…”
Minho looked at him with worried eyes. “You okay?”
“I’m fine…” Taemin sighed.
“He’s very excited for the party.” Key teased.
“Hyung!” Taemin stood quickly and balled his fists.
Key laughed loudly. “It’s not a big deal, Tae!”
“What isn’t a big deal?” Minho didn’t have any idea what the two were talking about, but he also didn’t like seeing Taemin upset.
“Nothing!” Taemin’s face was deep red and he stormed out of their shared room in a hurry, embarrassed.
“Wait dongsaeng!” Minho got up without a second thought, following him out into the hall without even putting his shoes on first.
Taemin froze in the middle of the hall, his arms stiff at his sides. He felt like Key was making fun of him and in front of Minho no less, someone he considered a good friend.
“What’s wrong tonight?” Minho caught up with him and stood close, wanting so badly just to hold him. “Is it something I said?”
“Aniyo…” Taemin sniffled. “There’s just something Key-hyung and I were talking about that has me a little worried is all…” He still stood facing away from Minho, not wanting to show his wet eyes.
Minho smiled a little and wrapped his arms around Taemin, pulling him into a warm back hug. “Whatever it is, don’t worry. I’m sure everything will work out just fine.” He forced himself not to nuzzle his cheek against the younger’s soft hair.
“Hyung…?” Taemin lost his breath; he wasn’t used to being held like this and it made him feel a little shy.
“And I’m glad that you’re coming to the Christmas party.” Minho smiled again. “It wouldn’t be the same without you.” He let go of Taemin slowly and went back to the room only to grab his shoes before heading back to his own dorm room. He bowed his head and whispered ‘goodnight’ as he passed Taemin in the hall again.
~*~
Minho spent the entire Saturday before the party to go out and look for a present for Taemin. Sure, he could have gotten the first thing he saw, but it wasn’t what Taemin deserved. Minho wanted to get him the best, most meaningful and most special gift that he could afford.
Minho was in love with Taemin.
He remembers too fondly the first day he met Taemin. Minho and Key were roommates during their freshman year, but Key had a new roommate this year; a cute, shy freshman named Lee Taemin. The red-head wasn’t very talkative at first but as time went on Minho became Taemin’s protective hyung, a friendship that he cherished above all others.
But he kept his feelings to himself. Not because he was shy or afraid, but because he didn’t want to burden Taemin with them. He was perfectly content with being his close friend until the right time came for them. He was hoping that this Christmas party was the perfect opportunity to confess his feelings.
He just needed the right gift to go along with his confession.
“Ah,” A small kiosk with hanging glass charms caught his attention as he walked. A small old man smiled at him when he stopped to take a closer look.
“I make them all myself.” The man explained. “If there’s something here you don’t see, I’d be happy to make one for you.”
Minho bowed respectfully and inspected the small charms individually. There were cute animals, fruits, words, hearts, and even abstract designs. “I think I would like a custom one, sir.”
“Oh?” The old man shuffled over. “What can I make you?”
“It’s a Christmas present, so can it be ready by tomorrow afternoon?” Minho worried suddenly, not considering the time constraint of the party being tomorrow night.
“I can do it as you wait here. It won’t take ten minutes.” The man gestured toward his glass-blowing tools behind protective Plexiglas. “You can even watch.” He pulled a small sketchpad from his pocket and looked to Minho for instructions.
“Oh, perfect then!” Minho smiled. “Can you make a dolphin?” He knew the younger loved the ocean and swimming; a dolphin just seemed to fit him. “And have it… well, I’m not sure if I’m describing it right… but can it be jumping over a heart?”
The man nodded and sketched as he listened. “Something like this?” The dolphin, not bigger than the size of a coin, was elegantly detailed and nestled under its front fin was a big, red heart.
“That’s great! Wow, that’s really perfect!” Minho nearly jumped.
“And what will this be strung on? A necklace? Bracelet?” The man confirmed one last detail.
“…A necklace. Definitely.” Minho imagined the pretty charm around Taemin’s neck and felt a sense of pride rush through him. To see it there every day would make his heart swell tremendously.
About ten minutes later, just as the man promised, the charm was finished. “Here we are.” The man strung a pretty silver chain into the loop and put the finished jewelry into a small, padded gift box.
“It looks better than I imagined… thank you so much!” Minho bowed deeply. This was the perfect present for Taemin and it was made especially for him. It was one of a kind, just like him. “What do I owe you?” He meant in terms of payment.
“Hmm, you know what? It’s on me.” The wrinkles around the old man’s eyes were more prominent when he smiled. “I can tell that this gift is for someone special.”
Minho blushed. “A-ani… I can’t walk away without paying for this…”
“Consider it a Christmas gift from me.” The man pat Minho’s shoulder.
“Ani ani,” Minho dug into his pockets and took out a $20. “Please take this, at least.”
The old man nodded and took the money without any more argument. “Your father raised you to be a gentleman.”
“Merry Christmas, sir.”
“You as well, son.”
~*~
Minho gripped Taemin’s present in his hand, elegantly wrapped in gold paper with a green ribbon holding it closed. He stood in the corner of the school’s large banquet room, simply watching the people pour in with their parents, dates, and friends. He watched Taemin too. The boy seemed nervous. Not as nervous as me Minho thought. Could it be that Taemin sensed what Minho was going to do? No, that’s not possible. Then again, their eyes kept meeting, and every single time, Minho looked away as quickly as possible with the most obvious blush on his face. Stupid… Calm down! He scolded himself.
“Hey Minho.” Key nudged him in the side, surprising him.
“YAH!” He nearly yelled as he tried to stuff the present into his suit jacket. “Don’t sneak up on a person like that!”
“Sheesh!” Key laughed. “What’s got you so jumpy?”
“Nothing!” He stammered. His eyes were locked to the other side of the room where Taemin stood anxiously.
“I’m waiting for Taemin.” Key said, folding his arms.
“Hmm?” Minho looked at him.
Key side-eyed him and smirked. “He has something to say.”
Minho felt his heart skip. His skin even began to heat when he looked back to Taemin and saw him walking closer. Could it be? Did he feel the same way? He stood straighter and cleared his throat. “Hey, Taemin.”
“Annyeong,” Taemin gave a shy smile.
“Hey um,” Minho laughed to ease his nerves. “I was hoping to talk to you about something. Also I got you a pres−”
“Can you hold on a minute, hyung?” Taemin kept walking right past Minho. He was too lost in his own daze to even notice what the older had said. His eyes were focused on Heechul.
“Huh?” Minho spun around to watch where Taemin was going.
“Heechul-sunbae…” Taemin began, standing directly in front of him with a hopeful smile.
“Heechul?” Minho’s eyes darted nervously and they began to sting.
“Hmm? Who are you?” Heechul asked, mad to be interrupted from his conversation with his classmates.
“Ah, sorry! My name is Lee Taemin!” He bowed and came back up clutching his collar. “I know you don’t really know me, but I’ve liked you for a long time.” He smiled so innocently. “I wanted to confess my feelings properly to you, so I finally got the courage.” His red cheeks only added to his beauty. “I found the courage just for you, sunbae.” He reached for Heechul’s hand and held it in his own. “I love you.”
Minho heard the words. I love you. He collapsed back against the wall and held his forehead. “No…” It wasn’t supposed to be like this.
Heechul looked down at the young freshman and chuckled. “Is this a joke?” He yanked his hand back from the younger’s grasp.
“A joke?” Taemin’s eyes widened. “N-no, sunbae… I really do love you.” He pursed his lips and hung his head, afraid he might start crying.
Heechul burst into more laughter and flicked Taemin’s forehead. “Get out of here, kid. I don’t even know you.” He rolled his eyes. “Stop with this ‘I love you’ shit. I’m not interested.”
Minho wanted nothing more than to take Taemin away from that situation. He himself felt crushed that Taemin didn’t return his feelings, but moreso didn’t want to see Taemin heartbroken. That hurt him even more.
Taemin was shaking now, trying his best to hold back hysterical tears. “I’m sorry then, sunbae! I won’t bother you ever again, I promise!” Without even looking up, he ran away. He ran from the banquet hall whimpering softly and as quickly as his shaking legs would let him.
“Oh no…” Key bit his lip. “That went horribly…”
“Taemin!” Minho ran after him without a second thought. He wasn’t trying to be selfish and use this moment to force his feelings onto the vulnerable Taemin, he just wouldn’t feel right leaving his friend alone in this moment.
“I’m so stupid!” Taemin sunk to the floor just outside of the room. “I should have known!”
“Taemin…” Minho dropped to his knees right in front of him and pulled him into a hug. “You’re not stupid. Don’t say that.” He locked his fingers in the younger’s hair and held him tightly.
Taemin spoke through his sobs. “Hyung, you don’t have to−”
“I know.” Minho spoke quietly. “Just cry if you have to. I’ll cry with you if that’s what you need.” He pulled the younger onto his lap and vowed to be strong; this was Taemin’s moment to be sad, not his.
“Hyung,” Taemin hid his face in Minho’s chest and cried, completely heartbroken over his rejection. “You’re a really good hyung, Minho.”
“And you’re a good dongsaeng.” He stroked the back of Taemin’s head to soothe him. “The best.” He whispered and closed his eyes, enjoying the warmth of their closeness.
After about forty-five minutes, Minho picked Taemin up just as he was in his arms and carried him back upstairs to the dorms. He had lost energy some time ago from crying and Minho brought him up to bed once he quieted to a soft whimper.
Luckily, none of them ever locked their dorms rooms before everyone went to sleep. He was able to put Taemin in his bed without seeming to wake him. He removed his shoes and suit jacket, and then pulled the blanket over him. “I’m sorry that this happened to you, Taemin-ah…”
The younger gave a tiny, desperate whimper. His eyes could barely blink open because his eyelids were so red and swollen, still wet from tears. “Mm,” He gave a small gesture to Minho meaning thank you before closing his eyes and drifting to sleep.
Minho waited a few minutes before getting up to leave. He stood in the doorway and just watched Taemin for a second, making sure he was sleeping soundly. He didn’t want to leave Taemin alone for any reason, but it was time to sleep…
~*~
Back in his room, Minho climbed into his bed and hid under his sheets. He knew he’d be alone for a while; Jonghyun and Onew weren’t ones to come back to the dorm before midnight, especially when there were parties. The red glow from the clock in the room reminded him how early it was: 9:46pm. He was completely exhausted though. His chest felt extremely heavy and made it hard for him to breathe. While he felt sad for Taemin, he was beginning to feel sad for himself. He felt in his pocket for the tiny present he intended to give to him tonight and put it on his nightstand.
He told himself over and over that he should have known; he shouldn’t have just expected to be able to go right up to Taemin and assume that he would have felt the same way. It’s not like Taemin outright rejected him, but knowing that he felt about Heechul how Minho wished he’d felt about him was heartbreaking in itself. And why Heechul? That big-headed jerk didn’t deserve a second of Taemin’s attention.
It’s not like he ever made any sort of effort to show Taemin how much he cared. Sure, he took care of him as a hyung, but anyone would see that as simply friendship. He had absolutely no courage to confront Taemin now, nor did he think it was appropriate to seeing as Taemin was in a pretty bad emotional state. And honestly, he probably would be for a while. All that crying…
Minho touched the shoulder of his shirt; it was still wet from Taemin’s tears. If there was anything in his life that he never wanted to see, it was Taemin crying. All he could do was cradle the younger as he spilled his very heart out of him. It took so much energy from Minho to listen to him cry for so long. All he could do was listen and rub his back and keep him warm. Even now he wanted to be with Taemin to make sure he was going to be okay…
10:24pm now. Had he really been just laying here for the past 45 minutes? His limbs felt disconnected and his head pounded; he needed to sleep. Before closing his eyes, he tucked the wrapped present in his nightstand’s drawer. It would have to wait to be opened until next year…
~*~
Despite not sleeping very well, Minho slept until 10:00am or so. Before he even woke up, Taemin had already left to go home for New Year’s break. Key said that he had called his parents for him because he knew the younger wouldn’t want to hang around. “Once the New Year comes, he’ll feel much better.” Key assured their group of friends with a certain nod. “He just needs to be alone.”
It would only be a week and a half, but Minho made himself physically sick worrying about Taemin. Was he eating enough? How about sleep; did he get adequate rest? He hoped that his immune system wasn’t weakened by this… a nasty flu was going around.
Luckily Taemin called Key after five days to check in. Apparently he missed everyone and wanted to say hello. Minho didn’t ask to speak to him, he was just happy knowing that his spirit was high enough to function properly.
Taemin returned looking healthy enough, but his usual bubbliness was noticeably suppressed. He smiled and laughed, but they were forced; his face didn’t shine like it used to. His eyes lacked that familiar glow that Minho fell in love with. Whenever he tried to mention even a hint of bringing up that issue, Taemin dismissed it as fatigue or hunger or some other nonsense excuse Minho could see right through.
He kept his distance, though, remaining as a hyung and nothing deeper. The first half of January passed quickly and classes resumed session again.
~*~
Before lunch, Minho liked to shoot some hoops to release some extra energy. On a Friday, he grabbed a ball from the locker room, changed from school shoes to gym sneakers, and began to dribble on the newly polished floor.
He couldn’t help but notice Heechul and a few of his friends sitting on the first row of the bleachers, probably skipping class, and blabbing loudly.
“You should have seen him, he was about to cry!” Heechul laughed.
“He honestly tried to tell you that he was in love with you?” One friend with badly-dyed blond hair didn’t believe him.
Minho stopped dribbling the ball and listened closely. Were they talking about Taemin?
“Yeah! It was pathetic… He’s so small that I could barely hear him.”
“Yah!” Minho had had enough. He threw the basketball across the court and walked straight up to Heechul. Even though Heechul was three years older, they were already the same height. “What the hell were you just saying?”
Heechul jerked back. “Minho? What are you d−”
“Answer me!” He fisted Heechul’s collar impatiently.
“I-I was just talking about that freshman kid…” He looked to his friends and wondered why no one was coming to his aid. “You saw him, the dorky one who tried to tell me that he liked me.”
Minho snarled and roughly pushed the older to the wall. “He’s not a dork! Don’t you ever say that about him!” He was yelling much louder than he intended.
While walking to lunch, Taemin passed the gymnasium and heard the yelling. “Hmm?” He walked closer to the open doorways and peeked inside.
“Hey, it’s not a big deal.” Heechul tried to shimmy out of Minho’s grasp. “He’s just a kid with some weird feelings. He’ll get over it.”
Minho was fuming; get over it? “How can you be so insensitive?” He felt tears well up in his eyes and his throat choked up. “You destroyed him!” His fingertips dug into Heechul’s neck. “You… you need to apologize!”
Taemin brought his hands up to cover his mouth and gasped; was Minho standing up for him? Part of him wanted to run in between them fearing there’d be a fight, but he felt like he’d be disrespecting Minho. After all, his hyung had done so much for him… He was torn.
“Apologize?” Heechul chuckled. “Stop bringing up a dead subject, hubae. I gave him my response already.” He managed to finally push Minho away from him and the group promptly made their way in the opposite direction.
Minho fell to his knees and ran his hands through his hair. “Damnit…”
Taemin’s feet automatically started running towards Minho but he forcefully stopped himself. He had already caused the older so much of a burden, trying to talk to him now would just make his shoulders heavier with his problems. He turned around and with a soft voice whispered ‘thank you hyung…’ before running off to the cafeteria.
~*~
“Why’re you so late?” Jonghyun questioned when Minho finally got to the cafeteria. “Lunch is just about over.”
“I don’t care.” He huffed, randomly fluffing his hair in a poor attempt to fix it. “Not hungry.”
“More for me!” Onew laughed and bit into the last piece of his sandwich. “Can I use your lunch card?”
“No!” Minho yelled.
“What’s got you so pissed off?” Key raised his eyebrow.
Taemin glanced at him shyly but kept his mouth shut; he didn’t want to admit what he saw, even if he did think it was rather sweet of him to do…
“Nothing, okay? Just aggravated. Drop it.” Minho put his head down on the table and sighed.
“Don’t pester him.” Taemin said quietly.
Minho looked up at Taemin. “Hmm?” He was almost surprised.
All Taemin did was give a gentle smile in response, but it was the purest, most genuine smile Minho had seen in a while from him.
“Alright, it’s time for next period anyway.” Key dragged the two older boys from their precious food and out into the halls.
“Hyung,” Taemin stayed beside Minho and away from the other three as they walked. “I saw you in the gym…”
Minho clenched his jaw; he was pretty sure that he didn’t just mean he saw him playing basketball.
“Thanks for sticking up for me in front of Heechul-sunbae…” He lowered his eyes shyly when he mentioned the senior’s name. “It was really nice of you…”
Minho blushed and darted his eyes away. “No problem…” He mumbled.
“And I never thanked you for that night, either.” Taemin added. He tangled his fingers together behind him and smiled. “You held me until I fell asleep…”
“…I wasn’t going to let you be alone after something like that happened.” Minho said it as if it were the only logical excuse.
“Well,” Taemin smiled. “It meant a lot to me.” His voice was softer than satin and sweeter than milk to the older. “So thank you.” He stopped and turned to face him just outside of his next class and suddenly wrapped his arms around Minho’s waist.
Minho’s body completely froze. Lee Taemin, the object of his affection, was hugging him. Before he could react, the younger squeezed tighter and gently nuzzled his cheek on Minho’s chest before pulling away.
“See you later, Minho-hyung.” He smiled again, but much bigger this time. His eyes even scrunched a little bit. He turned and entered the classroom in what seemed like slow motion to Minho, complete with imagined singing birds and dream-like sparkles emanating around him.
He was so completely, deeply, genuinely in love with Lee Taemin.
~*~
The rest of the school year went on without much excitement. Heechul graduated and left and Taemin seemed relieved. He didn’t say anything, but Minho could tell that he held his head just a bit higher afterwards. Nobody asked how Taemin was feeling about the situation; was he over it? Was he still hurting? Not even Minho was sure if he wanted to know. He and Taemin had a good relationship; they hung out often and enjoyed each other’s company as friends. If that’s all Minho was ever going to have, he was fine with that. Not completely happy, but fine.
The summer was fun. It was necessary that the boys return home for the summer but both Minho and Taemin lived in Seoul. Minho didn’t want to be intrusive to Taemin so he didn’t contact him at first to hang out, but the younger ended up asking Minho nearly every weekend to catch a movie or meet at a soccer field somewhere. They would stay out late, often past their curfews and would later have to face punishment, but the amount of laughter and happiness their time together brought was worth it.
The new school year started and the group ended up having the same roommate assignments: Key with Taemin in a regular dorm and Minho with Jonghyun and Onew in a senior suite. Key liked to complain that he deserved a room in the senior suite more than Minho since he was older and secretly Minho would have been glad to trade spots with Key if it meant being closer to Taemin.
A harsh winter struck in early November. Nearly three feet of snow kept the students at the boarding school locked away inside for the entire month. December wasn’t any better; high winds and freezing rain brought ice storms that made travelling extremely dangerous. For a while it was uncertain whether or not the school would host the annual Christmas party, but a good week of warm sunlight allowed most of the ice to melt and the party was scheduled for Christmas Eve.
The day of the party brought nothing but anxiety for Minho. He sat on his bed staring at the small wrapped box he got last year for Taemin as it rested in his lap. Would he even like the necklace? What if he thought dolphins were stupid? Could the glass have broken by now? Should he give it anonymously? Was it still too soon to try and confess his feelings to Taemin? Was he still hurting? Could it be that Taemin only sees him as a friend? Too many what ifs were making him feel nauseous.
“Minho, you ready?” Key popped his head into their room and smiled. “Party’s starting.”
“Yeah, be there in a minute.” He got up and flattened his dress clothes then carefully placed the present in his pocket again, hoping he’d have the chance to offer it to Taemin this year.
The banquet hall was decorated almost exactly like last year; a tacky effort in Minho’s opinion. At least they could have tried to make it special… In just a few minutes he spotted Taemin. His legs felt numb when he tried to move. Damnit! Why was this happening…
Taemin looked around the room and noticed Minho; with a big, happy smile and a wave, he started walking over to him.
Oh god… Minho felt nauseous again and was pretty sure he was sweating now. He cleared his throat, at least hoping his voice wouldn’t crack when he tried to speak.
“Hi hyung!” Taemin’s eye smile made the older melt every time. “Are you hungry? They have lots of yummy appetizers over there!” He grabbed Minho’s wrist and began to pull him.
“Wait,” Minho stopped him.
“Hmm?” Taemin looked down at his wrist and then back up. “Something wrong?”
Minho shivered. “No, nothing’s wrong.” He smiled when he saw the younger smile again; it always made him feel good. “I just wanted to give you something…” With shaky hands, he removed the small wrapped box from his pocket and held it out for him. “Merry Christmas, Taemin-ah.”
Taemin’s eyes widened and then lowered a bit. “Oh hyung… I didn’t get you anything…” He pouted slightly, embarrassed.
“I don’t want anything.” He said quickly. “…Will you open it now?”
Taemin smiled and took the box. “Ne!” As if the paper were delicate goldleaf, he unfolded the seams with great care. “What is it, hyung?” He giggled before lifting the tiny lid off and gasping. “Omo…” His soft fingers grabbed the chain and lifted it slowly until the dolphin charm dangled in front of him. “I love it.” He looked right into Minho’s eyes when he said it.
“I know you like the ocean, so…” Minho commented awkwardly. “And it’s custom made… No one else in the whole world has that charm except you.”
“Wow…” Taemin’s voice wavered a bit. “It’s beautiful…” He gently stroked the glass with his fingertip. “Will you put it on for me?”
“Ne!” Minho laughed to ease his nerves and undid the tiny clasp to bring it around Taemin’s neck. In a few seconds, he sealed the clasp again and let his fingers trail down the chain until they reached the charm.
Taemin placed his hand over Minho’s and looked up at him, his eyes a little teary. “Hyung,” He let out a tiny breath, disguising a happy sob as a laugh. “I didn’t want to say this because I was afraid. After what happened last year, I was so afraid…” He stood a bit closer while clutching his charm lovingly.
“Don’t be afraid of me…” Minho put his hands on Taemin’s waist. “I won’t hurt you.”
Taemin rested his forehead on Minho’s chest and laughed again, a nervous laugh that Minho knew as a tiny cry. “Hyung, do you know how loved I felt that night you held me? When I felt like I was going to die, you still made me feel loved.”
“It’s because I love you.” Minho said easily, much more easily than he thought he would.
“Minho-hyung,” He shivered. “Please love me even more.” He wrapped his arms around Minho’s torso and smiled. “Because I love you too. You taught me how to trust people again.”
“Taemin…” Minho kissed the top of his head. “I’ve always loved you. Even when you went to Heechul-sunbae instead of me, I loved you. When you cried and told me how awful you felt, I loved you then too. It hurt me so much to see you cry, but I kept loving you.”
Taemin sniffled. “I’m sorry…”
“Ani, that’s not necessary.” Minho rocked them softly side to side. “I just want you to know that from the very first day I saw you that I’ve had it so bad for you.” They laughed together quietly.
“I wish I had known sooner…” Taemin nuzzled his cheek on Minho.
“All that matters is that you know now.” Minho smiled. “Be mine, Taemin. I’ll love you and honor you and protect you forever.”
Taemin nodded. “Then I can give you something for Christmas.”
“What’s that?” Minho smiled.
“My heart.”