LOTF
When Harry woke it was with a stinging headache. As if he had drunk to much fire whisky the night before and it was exacting its toll. The setting sun was peaking through his shuttered windows and he groaned. He'd missed all his afternoon sessions with Hizen and the other masters. Why had he slept so long? Then it all came back in a blazing rush of memory. He moaned and buried his head in his pillow.
What the hell was the matter with him? Why had he done that? As he lay there he felt something close to disgust seep into his gut. Ron was right; he'd turned into some kind of filthy whore begging for a stiff taking from just about anyone. No! Those where not tears gathering in his eyes! He balled his fists in the bed sheets and gritted his teeth forcing them back. He had been out of control driven by some otherworldly need to take and be taken. Even now in the midsts of his regret just the memory of it had him stiffening and raising in his pants. Pants stiff from being wet and drying that way. His shirt was no where to be seen and there where bite marks on his shoulder.
"I prepared you a bath, thought you might want to clean yourself off before Ron sees you." Hermione, said coming out of his bathroom. He could hear the sound of water running and the light smell of scented soap. He would have smiled at her but he was uncertain of her mood and what she thought of all of this. She glanced at him and gave him a wobbly smile.
"Don't worry I'm not as dense as Ron, I'm not going to cry rape or anything like that. I will however ask you if you know what your doing?" She asked on a sigh, she sat down at the edge of his bed. She looked so troubled and sad, as if he weren't mad at Ron enough he was suddenly even more so. Whatever Ron had done to hurt Hermione he was going to pay for.
"No I don't actually. Don't worry though this is hardly the first time in my life I've been lost." Harry assured her. She nodded absently her eyes drifting to the door. She wasn't seeing anything though; she had the look of a person with their thoughts a million miles away. It took the door creaking part way open for her to break her daze. Into the room slid Slyfer, who in the past two weeks had reached the size of a Great Dane. He had taken to unfolding those great wings of his and then flapping them as if testing their strength. He slid in the elegant lizard like way of the dragon to the bed post near Hermione's feet.
"Well tell her to pick me up my wings aren't quiet ready yet!" He demanded in his usual arrogance. He had gotten used to the lizards biting tongue and forthright manner. He was actually very good company once you got past his superior attitude and seeming dislike for humans. The thing with Slyfer was he was mostly all smoke and very little bite. He didn't disdain humans as much as he would like people to think; after all he had been raised by one. At night some times he would sneak into his room and regal Harry with tales of their adventures in Brazil .
Draco had saved his egg from being eaten by another animal, true it was with the intention of eating it himself. Food was often sparse in the jungle and it had been years since he had eggs for breakfast. That in itself was testimony to young and inexperienced thinking. It never accrued to him as he carried this egg around that their might be something growing in it. In the morning instead of eggs for breakfast he had discovered a baby dragon curled in the ruins of its shell.
Harry didn't realize he was smiling until Slyfer snapped, "You want to stop grinning like a love sick ninny and get me up there?"
Harry rolled his eyes and gestured for Hermione to pick up the dragon. He gave her a comforting pat at her look of hesitancy. He was huge his head positioned well over the bed frame, he could have just jumped but he liked to do things the hard way. It was pretty funny watching Hermione struggle with the huge beast. He could tell Slyfer was enjoying causing someone else extra work. Hermione was the least amused of course and shot the dragon a scathing look once she'd settled him on the bed.
"Well if you two are going to sit here and chat, then I better leave. Oh and Ron will probably be up here sooner or later so if you want to wash and change I’d do it soon." She advised. She rose from the bed and began to shuffle away. She looked so down hearted in that moment that as much as he wanted to talk with Slyfer alone he couldn't send her away. Hermione was in many ways his sister and he didn't like her being unhappy.
"’Mione, stay. You shouldn't let something Ron say's or does bother you. You two have been taking bites out of each other for years. Whatever he's said now isn't any different." he counseled, she turned something lost swimming in her eyes. She stared at him rather forcefully.
"Is that why you refuse to talk to him these days then Harry?" Harry flinched she had a point. This was different though from their usual squabbles. This wasn't about not doing a spell correctly or not caring enough about the feelings of house elves. Ron had called him a whore!
"Would you like it if he called you a whore?" At this bitted admission, Hermione paled and shook her head. There was sheen of tears in her eyes. She shook and Harry frowned something was really upsetting her. "’Mione what is it. Come on didn't we promise to tell each other everything?" He coxed. She turned to him eyes swimming a look of desolation on her face.
"Ron would never say that to you, Ron would never have taken that sword and he wouldn't be crazy enough to try and revive the dead! Don't you see he wouldn't have left his post! Not when it meant leaving his brothers unprotected and his sister was along with us! I didn't think too much about it because he was looking at me so...I wanted him to kiss me I'd been waiting so long. When he did, it hurt Harry. It burned and I felt like something was trying to invade me. I could hear screaming Harry...he was screaming telling me I had to stop to fight it or we'd both be..." She gulped a sob breaking loose. Harry reached out gathering her to his chest. She wasn't making any sense.
She was talking about the night of Ginny's death he knew. When Ron had left his post too... Harry frowned. To what, kiss Hermione? She was right he could have done that when he got off watch, instead he had left his post leaving Fred and George alone and their backs unguarded. Ron loved his family too much to do that, not for a kiss. And Ron wouldn't call him something so hurtful! Even when they had fought in their fourth year he hadn't actually called Harry names. And he hadn't even worn one of those ‘Potter Stinks’ badges, even when they fought both of them didn't really want to hurt the other. For the first time the oddity of what had happened that night fully struck him, there where too many holes and unexplained behavior on Ron’s part.
Hermione trembled in his arms gulping back tears. "Then I started to enjoy it, it was like I was forgetting or blocking out that Ron was warning me to stop. Begging me to break away and warn you. His voice faded from my mind and all I could think about was this was Ron and we were finally doing what we both wanted to do. That's when I felt him, he was there and he was gloatingly gleefully happy. V-Voldemort was triumphant and I could feel him reaching out to as if he was going to touch me and I was going to loose myself. That's when we heard Fred scream and I broke away. Nothings been right since that night Harry, he hasn't been right something happened to him and I'm afraid I'm never going to get him back."
Harry held his friend as she cried, was she right? Had something happened to Ron while he was on watch had Voldemort done something to his best friend? Harry felt rage simmer in his belly, Voldemort had hurt the people he loved for the last time. And it was obvious he didn't want him and Draco uniting why else make Ron try and keep them apart? Well he was going to learn not to fuck with him or his friends. And he'd be damned if he let things continue as they where going.
"Hermione I need you to keep what you just told me to yourself." at her nod he soothed her back with his hand. It wouldn't do to let the enemy know he was on to him.
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Draco was surprised as to how hungry he was, he felt as if he could inhale an entire horse. Then ask when the main course was coming. His mood was in the pits as it where. One Weasley had gotten the best of him; it really wasn’t fair to attack someone when they had their back turned. And now that he thought on it had he been expecting it he might have knocked Weasley on his arse like he deserved.
He had been caught off guard so now there was a slight rash on his back, and Weasley was probably off in his room chuckling to himself. The next time he saw that dick he was going to teach him what real power was. Hang him indeed, just let him try. Although Harry might not appreciate him rearranging his best mates face. Draco sighed; there was another problem in itself. Harry was going to wake up and be in prissy denial of everything they had done together. He’d want to tear into him as much as Weasley did. And he wouldn’t fight against Harry. At least not now, he was still raw from the memory of watching Harry go up in flames.
In that moment when he had thought Harry was dieing he had realized how much pain that would bring him. His lungs had wanted to stop laboring for breath and a shudder of revulsion had rolled through his being. He never wanted to relive the feeling of loosing Harry. He had missed dinner being as he was passed out in his bathtub, where he had crawled to after Weasley’s surprising show of power. And this raging sense of hunger in his belly had finally woken him. It looked as if the sun had just finished setting and people where milling about doing whatever they did with their time in the evenings.
As he walked towards the kitchens in the castle many members of the order tossed him scathing looks of censure. He ignored those but surprisingly enough most just stared in contemplation, as if they had not quiet gotten his measure but were slowly coming to a conclusion. He shifted and continued onward.
When he reached the great hall he got another surprise, he wasn’t the only one late in getting a meal. Seamus and Dean sat at a table alone, the darker boy slipping his spoon into his lovers’ mouth in compatible conversation. Every time he looked at those two he got a little sick, and he couldn’t fool himself as to why.
What would it be like to actually be sure of yourself, to wake up and have Harry greet him with kisses instead of cusses? When they ate he would feed Harry his breakfast while entertaining him with idle chatter. What would it be like if Harry looked at him the way Seamus looked at Dean? With adoration and pride, instead of resentment and animosity, he sighed looking at those two was beginning to depress him.
He made to walk past them knowing that as former Griffendors and friends of Harry’s they would prefer not to eat with him. That’s when he received his second surprise of the evening. Instead of letting him pass and tossing glares of malice at him. Seamus actually tore his attention away from Dean to clasp his arm.
“Hey wait, sit down eat with us!” He invited that quirky smile Draco remembered from their school days on his face. He used to hate that goofy grin. What did Seamus have to smile about after all? He was a half-breed whose own father hadn’t loved him enough to stick around. He wasn’t dirt poor like Weasel but close enough to it that Draco would not be smiling if he were in his position.
Not to mention he had been a Gryffindor and a friend of Harry’s. Reason enough in his young mind to hate Seamus. He still couldn’t believe how blind the rest of his classmates had been. There’d always been one person for Seamus, his best mate. Who was always hanging by his side, getting into scrapes with him? Who always defended Dean even when he was wrong?
And besides whenever Dean went out with someone else Seamus appeared hurt, he’d quickly mask it. When Draco had found him in the boys’ lavatory balling about how many sluts this school seemed to be harboring, Draco had been convinced that Seamus didn’t want to be just “friends” with his best mate. He’d always wondered how Dean would take that admission.
He’d shuddered at the image of either Crabbe or Goyle professing love to him, and left Seamus to his tears. He’d never treated any of them with anything but disdain and Seamus was beaming up at him like he’d discovered a new friend. He stared the sandy haired youth down, searching for where this sudden change had come from.
He looked like the same old Finnegan to him. Not quite blonde but not quite brown haired either. Tall for his age yet shorter then Draco himself; his features not so much handsome more like irresistibly cute. And he was smiling as usual reeking of Irish charm and British school boy upbringing.
“I think your scaring him Sea; you might want to explain why you want him to.” Dean advised an amused grin spreading on his face. Seamus nodded and turned to Draco that smile of his widening.
“Well it’s just that eating with everybody else is like chocking on ice, so that’s why Dean and I started eating alone. I just figured now that you’ve worked things out, with yourself and Harry, you two might want to eat with us and let Ron and Hermione come to terms, ye ken?” He explained slipping into Irish slang. He’d been spending too much time over there; he was making very little sense.
“I have to thank you by the way, whatever magic you spin when you’re with Harry it’s addictive. I just had the best afternoon of mi life mate.” Seamus said with a grin tugging Draco into a seat beside him. Draco stared at him in shock. He thought him and Harry where together? Like he and Dean where together? Boy did he wish that were true, but over Harry’s dead body he was sure.
Dean grinned a dawning light entering his eyes and winked at Seamus. “I have you to thank for that? Well thanks Malfoy but I got to say if it’s like that every time for you what the hell were you waiting for?”
He was about to answer that, to correct Seamus in his misconception that he and Harry where in love and a couple when Harry strode into the hall. Draco felt his mouth go dry. How could anyone look so handsome in a pair of slacks and a t-shirt? Maybe it was because the clothing was tight in all the right places or the color contrasted and complemented his hair all at the same time. Maybe it was just Harry.
A Harry that was going to be extremely angry that he had succumbed to the mating heat, and give Seamus’ rosy idea that he and Draco where a happy couple a rude awakening. Tonight seemed a night for surprises though because when Harry caught sight of him he didn’t bluster with anger. His eyes flashed brilliant green and he sauntered forward. When had he learned how to move his body like that? As if he danced to some deep elemental rhythm designed just for him.
The air in the room instantly heated and he heard Dean gasp and Seamus giggle. “See what I mean, it’s like their giving away sexual energy.” He whispered into Dean’s ear. Draco was not paying much attention to them; Harry had nearly reached them, his hips swaying in a masculine yet sexy motion as he walked. His hair fanning out in black lochs around his face. When he reached them he stood in front of Draco a slight smile on his face.
"Harry, you’re awake." Draco stammered, he groaned inwardly he sounded like a nervous school boy. Harry grinned and gestured for him to scoot over. Draco complied and Harry took a seat.
"Yeah, if you're going to make a habit of making me pass out maybe we shouldn't be working together." Draco stared at Harry in shock. Was Harry teasing him, and not ribbing teasing but playful teasing? Who was this vision before him and what had he done with Harry? Was he still being swayed by mating heat? Or did he not regret what they had done together in the garden. Harry grabbed a plate of something from the platter in the middle of the table and began to eat. Draco watched him in shocked silence.
"So who's Alex?” Harry's question caught him so off guard that Draco almost fell off his chair. Harry gazed at him inquisitively motioning with one hand for him to share. What the hell was this? Draco wondered as he continued to stare at Harry in stupefied wonder. Harry rolled his eyes and set down his fork. "Look Draco if you think I'm going to get all anal about what happened out there; I'm not. Can't say as I'm thrilled about this new development and I still don't know what that makes me. At the risk of giving you an even more inflated sense of self worth I have to admit it was just too damn good for me to want to forget it ok. And I was serious about wanting to know you so let’s start with basics, who's this Alex kid Slyfer keeps mentioning and you kept moaning about before I passed out?"
Draco blinked at him, and then cleared his throat uncomfortably. "Alex was a boy I met in New York City . I saved him from a band of Death Eaters and since he didn't have any family to go home to anymore he started traveling with me."
Harry frowned and took a bite of the meat on his plate. Watching Harry put things in his mouth was doing something funny to his nerve endings. "How did you explain that to them later?" Harry asked.
Draco snorted in disgust, just when he'd been fooled into thinking Harry had gained some sense. "I didn't have to explain anything being as I'm not a Death Eater and dead men don't ask any questions." he snapped. Harry frowned and placed a slice of fruit on his tongue and sucked it into his mouth. Despite the fact that he was angry at him Draco couldn't help but wish that it was his own tongue or other part of his antonym in Harry's mouth.
"You’re not a Death Eater?" Harry asked, putting his fork down again to stare puzzled at him. Leave it to Harry; he had admitted to killing a bunch of men and Harry was concerned about where his allegiance at the time had lain.
"Why do you and you're little friends insist on labeling me as a Death Eater!" He asked exasperated with how dense Harry could be at times.
Harry eyed him a small glint of amusement showing in his eyes as he gestured towards Draco's arm. "Maybe that fancy tattoo you got there on your arm?"
Well Harry did have a point there, Draco thought as he fought back a grin. He shook his head rolling up his sleeve to reveal flawless skin. There was no Dark Mark in sight. "Well I did have it before, that's true but the first time I went Fae it disappeared in the fire. It seems even Voldemort's magic couldn't compare to a Fire Faes. Besides I haven't been a Death Eater for years, Voldemort doesn't welcome weak little boys who can’t even get rid of weakened old men."
Silence fell between them at the reminder of Dumbledore's death. Harry had stiffened in his seat his eyes going cool where before there had been warmth. Draco felt a pang of loss, was their truce to be so short lived then?
"You set him up Draco. You helped weaken him till he wasn't strong enough to fight back. You may not have done the shooting but you loaded the gun and handed it to them. How am I supposed to forget that, or to forgive it?"
He was right he had regretted every moment of his actions since the night he'd done them. He'd set out to do it to avenge this injustice done to his father. Spouting and believing all the things he'd taught to him over the years. His father was in prison their estate seized his mother grieving he'd wanted someone to suffer. The world had dealt him so many unfair blows; Voldemort had promised him so much. He'd also scared the shit out of him and in the actual doing of it he'd found out rapidly that he was in over his head.
He'd never been more scared in his life, more certain that he was going to die at the hands of a man holey evil. Some of the acts he had seen first hand Voldemort commit had left him sick and shaking. Voldemort had known little Malfoy wasn't fit to be a Death Eater. Those eyes had born into his soul and laughed at him, as if to promise that when his nerve failed him he would finish Dumbledore himself and gladly let Draco join him. He shivered at the memory of those eyes. And he'd been right when it came down to it, when Dumbledore had turned those eyes on him. He hadn't been able to kill someone good in the name of Evil.
So he and Snape had run neither would ever be welcomed amongst Dark or Light wizards again. Snape had killed his benefactor and friend but betrayed the other Death Eaters by saving Draco from the Dark Lords wrath. They had a wanted sticker on their heads on both sides. It was only because he was needed now that they hadn't sent him to Azkaban or worse.
"I know, and I have regretted every day since." Harry couldn't believe it, Malfoy was telling the truth. He hadn't been faking regret or terror that night. He could feel it; it was coming off of Draco in waves. He could feel his pain, his remorse and a fear of rejection in him. He didn't question how that was possible he reveled in it. He opened his mouth to say something when from behind them Ron spoke.
"Bull shit Malfoy. Once a Death Eater always a Death Eater, I don't care how you magicked away that mark!" Harry saw Draco stiffen as everyone turned too gap at Ron.
"Hey Ron, give over will you. The mans just trying to eat his dinner. Can't you cut him some?" Dean admonished shaking his head at Ron.
Ron tossed Dean a scathing look of disgust and replied "Silence! I thought better of you Dean, but what can you expect. You seem to share in Malfoy’s delight of having something shoved up your arse." He looked around the table and laughed. "Did I interrupt the meeting of shirt pushers? So sorry continue on then."
Dean gaped at Ron in shock. He'd never had a problem with him and Seamus before. True he'd been uncomfortable seeing two males kiss for the first time. In fact it had been almost comical how he tried to hide his discomfort, but he had gotten better at that. To the point where it truly hadn't mattered to him. So what the hell was this?
Seamus glared at Ron all traces of his usual smile gone in a blazing display of temper. "What bloody crawled up yer arse and bit you a new hole? If you have a problem with Harry and Malfoy being together that's your own deal!"
Dean felt a flash of pride in Seamus he sure was little minx at times but he could hold his own in a fight. When Ron's eyes flashed amber he felt a flash of fear. There was something dangerous about him, warning bells where going off inside his head. He Reached out and grabbed Seamus' hand yanking him back into his seat farther away from Weasley.
Weasley snorted in disdain, "It's not just Malfoy, although that's bad enough. It’s all of you! What is it about being desperate that turns men into whores! My sister dumps you Dean and you’re willing to take it up the arse for a little affection like a good little slut."
That ripped it and tore it for Dean, Weasley was begging for a beating. He shoved to his feet brushing aside Seamus’ hands trying to halt him. Pulling out his wand he walked over to stand face to face with Weasley, aware that Seamus, Harry and Draco had also risen to stand at his back.
"I was a slut and a whore? How many boyfriends did your sister go through too get to Harry? Showing off too get his attention, dumping me for no reason other then Harry had finally started to notice her. If I'm a whore I don't know what the hell that made her!" Dean watched in satisfaction as Weasley’s eyes blazed with rage after shooting Harry an apologetic glance.
Draco expected Harry to fly off the handle as he always did one some one slandered Weaselette. Surprise, Harry did nothing more then wince. He balled his fists and continued to stare Weasley down. Draco felt something warm and gooey pooling in his belly. Harry was standing against his best friend, with him. He wanted to open his wings and soar, to roar out his joy to the sky. His mate was standing by him!
"You aren't worth half of what she was Dean! So shut your filthy trap!" Ron seethed taking a threatening step forward. Dean raised his wand but Harry stepped forward pushing it aside. He stood facing his best mate, body braced for battle features elegant and graceful even under strain. Was it possible to overflow with pride an warmth, and did he dare believe that this was real and Harry was not still being deluded by mating heat and would take it all back in the morning.
"And neither are you. I may not agree with her methods of getting me but once she had me your sister was worth ten of you. She wouldn't turn her back on her friends because she didn't agree with their partners. She didn't abandon you did she when you made an ass of yourself with Lavender did she? She'd have your ass on the floor hexed to your ears if she where here right now. And if we weren't friends I'd do it for her! Whatever the hell has gotten into you Weasley it better stop!"
Weasley stared in shock at Harry; never had Harry refused to use his name. That was a punishment reserved for his enemies. Draco could feel Harry's resolve but also answering pain. Weasley’s words had hurt and standing against him hurt, but he'd done it. He felt a rage simmer in his gut, how dare Weasley take their friendship and toss it in Harry's face. He felt his fangs lengthen, Weasley was begging for a lesson and he was going to teach it to him. Harry's hand shot out to grip his arm. He shook his head.
"He's my best friend."
"He's tainted Harry; Voldemort’s done something to him."
"I know that, I think I can save him."
"You can't save everyone Harry."
Even as he said this his fangs were retracting and his anger cooling, the feel of Harry’s hand on his arm was doing funny things to his body. Harry smiled at him and rubbed his arm comfortingly before turning back to Weasley.
"You don't have any idea what I do to people who hurt my friends. Remember that." Harry warned.
His eyes had flashed a brilliant and dangerous green and the air had rippled with power, a jolt of it had rushed into his own body through the hand on his arm. Harry was not talking about Weasley’s comments he was talking directly to his one true enemy knowing that somewhere he was watching. Draco felt a shiver of apprehension as Harry turned away from Ron and they all began walking away. Harry wasn't strong enough to directly challenge the Dark Lord his mate was too reckless by far.
"Stop that, do you have some deep seeded death wish?"
"No I was just giving him fair warning; whatever he did to Ron the bastards paying for it"
"Yeah but have you ever heard of hiding your hand before you play it."
"Why do that when you can…"
Harry never finished he felt a blinding splitting pain in his head that knocked him off his feet. He let out a scream of pain, thrashing back and forth to avoid the sensation of being stabbed over and over again. He was bleeding it felt like his scare had split open as blood ran down his face.
Draco stared in shock as Harry crumpled then whipped around to face Weasley whose eyes where burning amber and a tiny smile played on his lips. His fangs burst forward in his mouth and instantly he was flame, it shot up his arms in a mesmerizing dance. Voldemort wanted to play, then let them play.