I am in hell help me....

[ayn_soph]

I just get crazier as time goes bye. I don't even know what's real sometimes. I'll walk into my house and hear the TV, but then I look and it's not even on. My distortion can make for an awesome sense of humor but it can also isolate me to the worst extreme. Compensation just devours my life. I need to become super organized. That way I'll be

Comments

[saratea]

Once again I find myself in a moment where I hesitate to say anything for the depth of our interactions have been only temporary but I find myself in technological mindframes for endless hours and weeks on end surrounded by metal and glowing screens & my steps back into nature even temporarily have really cleared my head & calmed the edges...in small or little doses, patches of land, etc....

[ayn_soph]

Indeed, running just gives things time to grow and become even more destructive. I am scared. I have a general anxiety all the time. I don't know why and I don't know what to do. I realize that our interactions are few and far between but they are always of a certain depth. I don't mind that you only respond when you have something important to say. It gives your observations a certain depth. Oh, if I could just die. But that's will never be an option.

Re: e

[saratea]

You mentioned below your lack of sleep...it might be worth taking the time to explore solutions. Just that alone could be reason for some of the things you're feeling...

Time outdoors beyond just a fitness element, vitamin d/melatonin...small things. I know...there could be a hundred suggestions and solutions but sometimes the small things really fucking help.

I was lacking the fitness element...I've been adding that, a few minutes even of sunlight and time away from concrete/computers even temporarily for a few minutes...the small things.

Either way...some thoughts

e

[o0olellyo0o]

Eek sounds like you need some rest, wes...

Re: e

[ayn_soph]

I wish I could sleep. I can, for about 2 hours at a time. It's like that all night. I really think that I'm going insane. Perhaps I just don't understand these changes. I'm getting older, though. Maybe I should get some sleeping pills.

Re: e

[o0olellyo0o]

melatonin seems to work well for a lot of people.

Diagnosed

[boo_a_peek]

Fill me in on other details. I want to know if you have ever been specifically diagnosed with schizoid tendencies/disorders?