Chill- 12&13
Chapter 12: love and madness
(FPOV)
I woke up in his arms in the middle of the night,
I knew staying till morning would mean not being able to say goodbye so I nudged him,
waking him up
I could see that the human had faded quite significantly by how his eyes didn't have that same sparkle they usually possesed,
he was hungry now... I could see it
"bite me," I said
"just once, you're hungry." I finished, and he groaned
"I-I can't." he said
"what if I can't stop?"
I took a piece of glass off the floor, from the end table he had broken the other night and sliced through the flesh on my palm
He gulped, staring at my hand his eyes filling with lust
"Just for a few seconds..." I said, wanting him to have one last piece of me, wanting him to have me coursing through his veins
running through his dead, broken heart, no matter how sick that was...I wanted it more than anything right now.
he brought my palm to his mouth and licked at the blood that dripped off the wound
I heard him moan lightly as he did this, and finally, he dug his teeth into the wound
my breathing hitched as he did this, as he suckled at my palm, I could tell he was controlling it, pacing himself
and then, when my palm was starting to tingle he broke away, and pressed his lips to mine,
I tasted my own blood, myself off of his lips,
"You gotta go." he said, breaking away
and I nodded
I pulled on my clothes and he just sat there, watching me
he then kissed me again, softly on the forehead
"Goodbye." he said, but I refused to repeat that
"Yea." I said instead, turning away and feeling a few tiny droplets drip down my cheeks
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
It was 4:30am, and the streets were completely blank, quiet.
I could feel the cold air hitting my face, wet with tears, and I shivered
I didn't want to talk to Nick right now,
I didn't wanna explain how a 'short walk' turned into a 9 hour absence
I sat outside of the apartment for a while, the taste of blood still lingering, my blood
I smiled weakly at the fact that It was still with him, in him. At least for now,
coursing through him, his life.
I took out a cigarette, and placed it in between my lips gently
feeling numb, dead inside.
The door opened and Nick appeared beside me, I stiffled my tears and looked down at the steps I was sitting upon and not at him
"I saw you walk up," he said, standing in between the door
"I'm going to make some breakfast..."
I acknowledged him with a hum, and he walked away, obviously not impressed with me
and finally, after he left after I caught a glimpse of my life without him,
without Gerard
the floodgates opened, and I cried, and I cried, and I cried.
Loudly and painfully...
I would have to get used to that,
noise and pain...
noise and pain.
---------------------------------------------------------
We ate in silence, the only sound was him, crunching his cereal
"I'm sorry I didn't believe you," he said, and I shrugged
"It's alright," I said, and he sighed
"I really love you, Frank." he said, staring at me intently from across the table
"But, if this... if this is going to continue I need to know that the feeling's mutual."
He was so matter-of-fact now, so businessy
"I love you Nick." I said, not knowing if it was honest or not,
"I do." with that I got a smile out of him, and he stood up, walking towards me and kissing me on the cheek
"I'm always here...if you need to talk." he said, and I nodded
numb.
and then he left,
he left me at the table, breakfast full and uneaten in front of me
and I began to cry again.
------------------------------------------------------------
Chapter 13: Punchline
March 19th
(FPOV)
Winter was officially over,
I watched out the window as the warm spring rain washed away any of the remaining snow off of the sidewalk
the trees were still bare but there were buds on a few of them;
Nick came over to me an sat down, putting his hand on my knee
"I'm going to miss the snow," he commented and I shrugged
It didn't matter to me either way
It had been 2 months now since me and Gerard parted ways
and 2 months sice I'd seen her, Carol.
I would never forget that name as long as I live..that evil wench.
I want to see her again just so I can beat her up...or at least, try to.
"How's work?" he asked me and I smirked at him and his attempts at conversation,
"I've got a new student...she's such a friggen' brat." I answered
"Apparently her parents forced her into lessons, she thinks she would've done fine without, and she has to say so every 5 minutes"
Nick laughed lightly
"How old is she?"
"12." I replied, and he nodded with a smirk
"Don't worry about it then, that's the most awkward age...not really a kid, not really a teenager, she's just trying to act older than she is."
"Well, isn't that supossed to be her parents problem?"
"Well, they don't get paid for putting up with her, you do."
I nodded, and we went back to being silent.
Nick grabbed the remote and turned on the TV, it was on the news
Nick moved to change it, but I grabbed his wrist
"Woman found dead in nightclub bathroom, completely drained of blood"
The man with the typical news anchor voice boomed
"You really wanna hear about this?" Nick asked, and I nodded, shushing him.
"She appears to be the fifth victim of what we're calling the vampire killer"
"These victims, despite their severe blood loss the blood is never located, and never anywhere near or on the bodies"
The vampire killer....
I repeated in my head over, and over
I felt awful for the people so, so awful
but this meant that he was still here, still around.
Nick looked at me oddly, and I finally turned the channel
"Drained of blood?" Nick asked weirdly
"That's just really sick."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The next few days were warm and sunny, the buds had began to open and the birds had returned to the city,
"I don't think I miss the snow anymore," Nick said as he held my hand tightly
and I nodded
"Don't blame you there, man." I replied, looking around at all the telephone poles
they all had millions of flyers,
Because of the 'vampire killer' the whole area now had a curfew...
fuck, Gerard must be just loving this....
I can just picture him now, watching the policemen on TV talking about all their leads and evidence while he laughs knowing
they could not be more wrong.
and then there were the wanted signs, with the artists rendition of who they thought it was
now, here they were on the right wavelength,
the man had chin length black hair, light eyes
but the resemblances stopped there, the nose was too pointy, the eyes too far apart and the lips were too big
Nick then tugged me away and kissed my cheek
"You're so cute, y'know?"
I smiled at him,
"so I've been told."
Nick kissed me again,
causing me to giggle lightly,
I thought of Gerard again,
and the whole idea of 'moving on'
I wanted nothing more than to be with him, forever and fucking ever
the thing about him was that, I could be myself, completely
and yea, he'd have his comments but he was never condemning.
Nick...
I sighed to myself as I looked over at him
We were silent way too much of the time, I have to overthink things before telling him
afraid of him dismissing it or calling me 'silly'
and I know I'm awful for comparing... I know that I love both of them on some sort of level.
I could be comfortable with Nick,
I mean...having just him in my life wouldn't drive me crazy or anything...
I could do it
But what would drive me crazy is knowing that Gerard's alone.
He can't just move on, no matter how much it hurts me to do, I will be able to have someone there, no matter how I feel about them, they'll at least be there...
but not Gerard. If he does, they'll die...
How fucking awful is that, I hung my head slightly at the thought looking back at the posters and wanting to cry
wanting to run to him and tell him to fuck everything,
wanting to hold him.
But I didn't want him to die... I couldn't let that ever happen.
Nick then led me to a bench, and I sat down staring at him through glazed eyes
He sat beside me and grabbed my hand with both of his
"I know we've only been together for a few months..." he started and I just stared at him
"But I love you, I love you more than anything... and"
How could he? I asked myself silently How could he possibly love me more than anything
when he tells me most of the things I say are dumb?
"Will you marry me?"
He looked at me fearfully and I bit my lip
"Is that legal?" I asked, forcing a smile and he shrugged
"We can look into that later," he smirked, still nervous
and then I kissed him,
Not fully being able to say yes, but too scared of what would happen if I said no.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(Gpov)
'Vampire Killer?'
I had seen the flyers all over town, the crudley drawn portraits of me, the bullshit about a curfew
I ripped a few of the flyers off, thinking of putting them in a scrapbook or...something
I guess I've gotten a bit sloppy, makes sense I've been in frenzy mode for the past couple of months now
But this curfew didn't pose as an inconvienience, there would always be bums, teenagers, cops...
There was a kid in one of the alleys, spray painting something that I thought read
"Give us back the night!"
I kicked a can, and watched as he ran the fuck outta there as soon as he heard the noise
Everyone likes to act tough...
I found myself travelling down a familiar road and scoffed to myself as I passed that particualr apartment building,
as I seemed to every single night now.
I stood there for a second watching the light of the TV buzz, it was 2:45 now and it was the only apartment that had any light in it
I could see that picture of 'me' -that sketch become bigger on the screen
He was hanging on,
and I could've killed him for it, he's supposed to forget, he's supposed to let the fuck go.
How did I know that he'd find some way to be defiant?
I smiled to myself at him and his stubborness and then continued walking
the buzzing of the TV light comforting me as I did.
my smile then faded away as I came to the sad realization,
That I was holding on too...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------