(no subject)
Hi...
Sorry if I haven't wrote a thing, but I was really down.
My aunt, along with my mother, invited me and Marco for New Year eve at the party my family holds every year.
My grandparents, my aunts, my uncles, my cousins were there.
When they invited me, I was really happy. I thought they had finally accepted my child and my life style.
I was at cloud nine! And even Marco was excited about that.
We went there for lunch, and everything was fine.
We felt out of place, but it was fine. We knew we couldn't hope everybody will be ok about us, but it was ok.
I was with my family!
Then, my great grandmother said somebody wasn't going to have the "strenna". The "strenna" is a tradition of the 1th of the year.
The eldest give the youngster some money.
Nothing special.
I mean, I don't really need her money!
Everybody started whispering about who could be the one who wouldn't have the money.
I said it was me. It was obvious. I'm not exactly the most loved grandchild, ne?
I spent the rest of the day with my family, and my aunt (she's only 22) who was scared my great grandmother had some grudge against her boyfriend.
After midnight we cheered and all. Then, I went to the other room with my fiancé, my mother, my aunt and her boyfriend.
We were the ones who more possibly were on the "bad list".
My aunt and her boyfriend were called, so we assumed they were on the "good list".
Then she called my mother. But she refused the money. After my mother refused the money.
Then she had started screaming about how I was a failure and how I shouldn't be there.
Some people agreed with my great grandmother, others defended me. It was awful.
Everybody was yelling, someone was trying to calm people down, Marco started yelling about how they shouldn't scream like that in front of a pregnant lady, and things got worse.
I almost wanted to die.
Why did I accept? I ruined their party. I'm not one of them anymore. I'm sick and tired of this.
I went in another room, 'cause I couldn't face them. I wanted to go away but I was too scared I just couldn't move.
Then I heard Marco yelling, he was trying to find me.
So I took courage and went to him.
He hugged me and we left.
Some of them called me and said they were sorry, but the words they said were too hurtful.
I spent these days asking myself if I could do it. If I could deal with a life of hardship and people all too ready to judge me.
I'm tired. This isn't what I asked for.
Marco was wonderful. He stayed with me all the time.
I smoke half a cigarette. I hope this don't hurt the baby. But I really needed that.
I just hope I'm strong enough.
This pregnancy isn't going to be an easy one.
Sorry if I haven't wrote a thing, but I was really down.
My aunt, along with my mother, invited me and Marco for New Year eve at the party my family holds every year.
My grandparents, my aunts, my uncles, my cousins were there.
When they invited me, I was really happy. I thought they had finally accepted my child and my life style.
I was at cloud nine! And even Marco was excited about that.
We went there for lunch, and everything was fine.
We felt out of place, but it was fine. We knew we couldn't hope everybody will be ok about us, but it was ok.
I was with my family!
Then, my great grandmother said somebody wasn't going to have the "strenna". The "strenna" is a tradition of the 1th of the year.
The eldest give the youngster some money.
Nothing special.
I mean, I don't really need her money!
Everybody started whispering about who could be the one who wouldn't have the money.
I said it was me. It was obvious. I'm not exactly the most loved grandchild, ne?
I spent the rest of the day with my family, and my aunt (she's only 22) who was scared my great grandmother had some grudge against her boyfriend.
After midnight we cheered and all. Then, I went to the other room with my fiancé, my mother, my aunt and her boyfriend.
We were the ones who more possibly were on the "bad list".
My aunt and her boyfriend were called, so we assumed they were on the "good list".
Then she called my mother. But she refused the money. After my mother refused the money.
Then she had started screaming about how I was a failure and how I shouldn't be there.
Some people agreed with my great grandmother, others defended me. It was awful.
Everybody was yelling, someone was trying to calm people down, Marco started yelling about how they shouldn't scream like that in front of a pregnant lady, and things got worse.
I almost wanted to die.
Why did I accept? I ruined their party. I'm not one of them anymore. I'm sick and tired of this.
I went in another room, 'cause I couldn't face them. I wanted to go away but I was too scared I just couldn't move.
Then I heard Marco yelling, he was trying to find me.
So I took courage and went to him.
He hugged me and we left.
Some of them called me and said they were sorry, but the words they said were too hurtful.
I spent these days asking myself if I could do it. If I could deal with a life of hardship and people all too ready to judge me.
I'm tired. This isn't what I asked for.
Marco was wonderful. He stayed with me all the time.
I smoke half a cigarette. I hope this don't hurt the baby. But I really needed that.
I just hope I'm strong enough.
This pregnancy isn't going to be an easy one.