woah

[ayden79]

I haven't written, really, in a few years now. Its so strange to see a pen everyday knowing that I barely remember how to use it.

everything is pieces waiting to come together like a puzzle
but nothing is the same
maybe they're beige face down
or maybe they were never meant for solving
whats waxing is my hesitance
whats waning is my patience and wherewithal
if i ever had any at all
to begin with
is benign aftermath
ricochets and rockets promising things that aren't to be said
that can't be...
measured out its little more than error
and arrogance
wishful thinking and
quixotic leanings that miss the mark
my words.... convoluted
and looting the liquor store wont do anything to move this
along the same lines are thoughts that whirl and sink and muss up everything
and yet i let it linger
let the thoughts stagnate like
guppies in an eddy
like fictition and pretention could make something of false neologism
air unadvised for flying
wind too fast to weigh in knots (to tie them at all)
and not that we could do anything
and not that we might anyhow
and not that i cared to begin with
and not that the answers matter
its not as if they're visable
or desired
or the least bit ambiguous in anyway
and it's not as if the ambivalence isn't perfectly clear
like this knowing
the way all things know gravity will be their master
and undoing

so how did we start down this road anyways?