hold on
it's so quiet here... she thought. no one will
be able to hear me howl or cry or laugh or scream, even if i try
as loudly as i can.
i found out today that i can get to you, but at a cost. i want so
to see your face, but i don't want to crowd you. i want to be there
for you, but not hurt you. it's so hard do to this, or at least that's
what i think. but caution never achieved anything lasting. today i
told someone about you, and how i feel. they listened patiently to
what i said, and it felt good to say these things. it made me realize
how much i want to say them to you, but i want to wait until i can
say them to your face.
you taught me what it was to present myself unguarded before
someone else without ever showing me how. you stripped away
every mask i ever put on without lifting a finger toward them. if i
could show you these things, i don't think you'd really understand
at first. you might not believe me, but i'd do what i could to fix
that. kiss away the awe and disbelief until you were sure of what i'd
said. let me show you these things, let me simply sit beside you,
hold your hand and rest my head on your shoulder.
i'd come and whisk you away from your self-imposed solitude, but
having little more than my own two feet, the miles that hold us apart
seem cruelly distant. i reach out to you through messages written
on foggy windows in the early morning and hold you in my heart
each night as i lie awake and wonder 'are you okay?' i know i worry
as you would put it needlessly, but i worry nonetheless. i want to know
how you are, how your day went and who made you smile. but i'm here,
and you seem to have cut yourself off from me, and from most everyone
else.
don't make me fear for you. don't make me worry as i do. talk to me.
please, reach back for the hand that i'm holding out for you. i can't keep
it up forever, and i want it to be taken with all my heart. don't make me
wait for too long, because i don't want to break over you as hard as i
know i will if you keep averting your starving gaze. if nothing else, allow
me to be a soul on which to lean and be the same for me. beyond all else,
you are my friend, and i want that to stay. even if you don't decide to love
me as i do you, don't send me away from your company. let me continue
to care, even if it's only from the bounds of friendship. i'll love you in any
way that i can.
just let me love you...
be able to hear me howl or cry or laugh or scream, even if i try
as loudly as i can.
i found out today that i can get to you, but at a cost. i want so
to see your face, but i don't want to crowd you. i want to be there
for you, but not hurt you. it's so hard do to this, or at least that's
what i think. but caution never achieved anything lasting. today i
told someone about you, and how i feel. they listened patiently to
what i said, and it felt good to say these things. it made me realize
how much i want to say them to you, but i want to wait until i can
say them to your face.
you taught me what it was to present myself unguarded before
someone else without ever showing me how. you stripped away
every mask i ever put on without lifting a finger toward them. if i
could show you these things, i don't think you'd really understand
at first. you might not believe me, but i'd do what i could to fix
that. kiss away the awe and disbelief until you were sure of what i'd
said. let me show you these things, let me simply sit beside you,
hold your hand and rest my head on your shoulder.
i'd come and whisk you away from your self-imposed solitude, but
having little more than my own two feet, the miles that hold us apart
seem cruelly distant. i reach out to you through messages written
on foggy windows in the early morning and hold you in my heart
each night as i lie awake and wonder 'are you okay?' i know i worry
as you would put it needlessly, but i worry nonetheless. i want to know
how you are, how your day went and who made you smile. but i'm here,
and you seem to have cut yourself off from me, and from most everyone
else.
don't make me fear for you. don't make me worry as i do. talk to me.
please, reach back for the hand that i'm holding out for you. i can't keep
it up forever, and i want it to be taken with all my heart. don't make me
wait for too long, because i don't want to break over you as hard as i
know i will if you keep averting your starving gaze. if nothing else, allow
me to be a soul on which to lean and be the same for me. beyond all else,
you are my friend, and i want that to stay. even if you don't decide to love
me as i do you, don't send me away from your company. let me continue
to care, even if it's only from the bounds of friendship. i'll love you in any
way that i can.
just let me love you...