ok so here goes!
humm im frustrated, not sexually. SORRY.
ok why dont i feel happy when i hang up the phone with benjamin. like i should be gushing with happiness or at least happy, content maybe. he says im weird like acting weird, its always me! like once, our last big fight it was me trying to distance myself from him bc i was falling for him and he couldnt even have me as a girlfriend. ok im basically his gf but yaddie yadda he cant call me that yet even tho we are exclusive, 5 monthes now. anyway last night i jokingly said he was a bad bf type guy to me, TOTAL JOKE. i love being around them. anyway he hung up on me i called back like 7 times he finally aswered and said he took it seriously bc i was acting weird again latly. he finished the little converstion with "im hanging out with GENYE, amy let me hang out with GENYE"! so i was upset when i was so happy to talk to him earlier.
off subject kinda, i had a great day and he called all cute like we talked for a bit. great funny convertation. one of those you just gush over and totally fall for the boy. he got off to pee i said will you call me back and he jokingly said "amy i have things to do" i thought he ment polay guitar and change clothes or somthing. but i hung up giggling. So this converstion above that was fucking harsh happened later when i called thinking he would be in bed. i asked about his things to do he said oh that was hang out with genye and get dinner.
ok i understand shes his best friend but he spends so much time with her. any freetime is usually with her i see him 2 times a week maybe bc he is so busy.
she sees him alot, i totaly drop what im doing when he calls. when hes bored i come over, when hes sad and wants me i come. im a fucking TOOL.
why have i totaly fallen for someone who could laeve me and not think about me again.
he says if he didnt care he wouldnt call, or see me.
but i need a SHOW of affection. i need him to show me he wants me around.
i wanna go off some more but i dont wanna kill you all.
what am i saying no one fucking reads this
thats why i can write about anything bc no one cares, why would they read this?
im tired of being alone, i guess thats a diffrent subject.
AND I dont fucking care if this has bad grammer or spelling errors.
AMY
ok why dont i feel happy when i hang up the phone with benjamin. like i should be gushing with happiness or at least happy, content maybe. he says im weird like acting weird, its always me! like once, our last big fight it was me trying to distance myself from him bc i was falling for him and he couldnt even have me as a girlfriend. ok im basically his gf but yaddie yadda he cant call me that yet even tho we are exclusive, 5 monthes now. anyway last night i jokingly said he was a bad bf type guy to me, TOTAL JOKE. i love being around them. anyway he hung up on me i called back like 7 times he finally aswered and said he took it seriously bc i was acting weird again latly. he finished the little converstion with "im hanging out with GENYE, amy let me hang out with GENYE"! so i was upset when i was so happy to talk to him earlier.
off subject kinda, i had a great day and he called all cute like we talked for a bit. great funny convertation. one of those you just gush over and totally fall for the boy. he got off to pee i said will you call me back and he jokingly said "amy i have things to do" i thought he ment polay guitar and change clothes or somthing. but i hung up giggling. So this converstion above that was fucking harsh happened later when i called thinking he would be in bed. i asked about his things to do he said oh that was hang out with genye and get dinner.
ok i understand shes his best friend but he spends so much time with her. any freetime is usually with her i see him 2 times a week maybe bc he is so busy.
she sees him alot, i totaly drop what im doing when he calls. when hes bored i come over, when hes sad and wants me i come. im a fucking TOOL.
why have i totaly fallen for someone who could laeve me and not think about me again.
he says if he didnt care he wouldnt call, or see me.
but i need a SHOW of affection. i need him to show me he wants me around.
i wanna go off some more but i dont wanna kill you all.
what am i saying no one fucking reads this
thats why i can write about anything bc no one cares, why would they read this?
im tired of being alone, i guess thats a diffrent subject.
AND I dont fucking care if this has bad grammer or spelling errors.
AMY