Stray Cat Strut...?

[tattooed_jet]

Who: Starscream and...anyone susceptible to fuzziness
What: RANDOM encounters 
Where: Teeny cat legs but jet stamina?  Anywhere in the city. 
When: After his Unfortunate Kittenification
Warnings: Kitteny snark, possible hairballs.

Compared to the disaster that the All Spark replica had turned into--and the more he thought about it, the more he thought

Comments

The Clinic!

[schrodingersbot]

"Why, hello there little one!" Perceptor exclaimed as he set his tools down upon an empty repair cradle. He knelt down, extending a fingertip toward the tiny little fluffball of a kitten, with a bemused smile upon his features.

"How did you make entry here, little fellow?"

The Clinic!

[tattooed_jet]

Through an egregious breach in your security system that I shall file away later to exploit, Starscream thought. Or rather, "Mroo?"

He knew a sucker when he saw one, and here was a king of suckers. And a scientist, no less. There must be something worth discovering here. He reared up on his hind legs, swatting at the finger with one grey-padded paw.

The Clinic!

[schrodingersbot]

Perceptor allowed himself an entirely unscientific giggle as he waggled his fingertip to play with the kitten.

"You are fortunate that I have such highly advanced visual acuity, my little feline," he expounded as he reached forward with his other hand to offer the little grey fuzzball a perch to jump up on. "Otherwise, I might have placed a foot in a truly tragic manner before noticing you!"

[tattooed_jet]

The laugh made Starscream twitch--I am not an object for your mirth, you oversized oaf!--until he recalled his purpose. Reconnaissance. It sounded so much more elegant than 'spying'.

He swatted at the fingers, letting his claws out. FEAR HIS VICIOUS ASSAULT, Autobot.

The only tragedy here is that you Autobots, with your nauseating morals, have lasted this long. Or rather, "Ngiao."

[schrodingersbot]

Sadly, Starscream, your claws weren't really sufficient to do much more than tickle Perceptor's metal plating. Even at his sensitive fingertips. He enjoyed the show of bravado and spunk, however, and carefully scooped the kitten up into his hand.

"A feisty little lad, aren't you?" He replied, flashing KittenScream a grin that was far more charming than it had any right to be, courtesy of his own Halloween visitor.

Tilting his head as he peered at the tiny kitten, he pondered. "I do believe that I have some milk, here. Let me fetch it." Setting the kitten down on the workbench amidst a few datapads and tools, he trotted over to his stash of human foodstuffs to fetch a saucer of milk.

Leaving a certain conniving Air Commander In Disguise as the lord of his domain! The king of his workbench! The sneakiest sneak what ever sneaked a sneak!

And a table full of datapads of equations that miiiiight be in the line of quantum displacement theories, and spacial-temporal shifting.

[tattooed_jet]

Oh, the claws were ineffective? Starscream notes that he might have to upgrade his assault to the needle-sharp teeth.

He gritted those selfsame teeth as he endured the indignity of being picked up. Milk, though, or at least the promise of it, did a bit to smooth his mood. "Nnnngggow!" Hurry up, you oaf!.

In the meantime, he entertained himself by studying a datapad, scrolling down it with one paw. Trying, desperately, not to get distracted by the blinking cursor.

[schrodingersbot]

In short order, Perceptor had returned with the saucer - actually, more like a large plate, but a tiny saucer was a bit small even for his delicate grasp - which he placed on the workbench.

"And a demanding little one, too, aren't you?" he cooed cheerfully, giving the top of Starscream's head a gentle scritch.

"You require some sort of nomenclature, I think," he observed as he poured milk onto the plate until it nearly overflowed. "'Little one' and 'lad' are all well and good, but a bit demeaning. Hmm.... what shall I call you?"

[tattooed_jet]

This entire thing is demeaning Starscream thought, tilting his ears into the scritching. But...reconnaissance. Intelligence.

And now...distraction. Milk.

Or this data. Milk or data. Milkordata. milkordatamilkordata.

He pounced on the datapad. STAY. Go nowhere! "Mew!" And then he strolled to the bowl, watching the milk pour in.

You shall call me Starscream, your rightful ruler, you Autobot wretch!. "Prrrprrrprrrrprrr."

[schrodingersbot]

Sorry, Starscream, but Perceptor sadly does not speak Cat Telepathy. He grinned as he watched the little grey fluffball pounce the screen of his datapad, obviously enthralled by the cursor, no doubt.

Fluffball. Hmm....

"Yes. Fluffy. I do believe that suits you wonderfully!" he declared proudly. "There you are, Fluffy! Enjoy your milk!"

And then, he knelt down, resting his chin upon the workbench so that he was more on optic-level with "Fluffy", so that he could observe the unique and fascinating mechanics of feline drinking.

[tattooed_jet]

Fluffy?! YOU NAUSEATING AUTOBOT! He will shed indignation like dander. "NGAAAAOOO!!"

But first, he must fortify himself for what will be your inevitable and excruciating doom. DOOM, Perceptor. Your day is numbered. To today.

Right after milk.

[schrodingersbot]

"Such an enthusiastic agreement!" Perceptor beamed down at Fluffyscream as the kitten began lapping up the milk.

"Fluffy it is, then!"

He was beginning to see what Carly's fascination for these little felinoids had been; there was something so soothing about watching little Fluffyscream happily lap up his milk. Even more so when Perceptor cautiously reached out with a single digit to stroke gently down the tiny grey back.

A memory flickered through his processor, and, with a grin, Perceptor produced a bit of twine, dangling it near the edge of the plate, within sight, waiting for Fluffyscream to notice it.

[tattooed_jet]

Starscream looked up from the milk bowl.

You dullard! That was not agreement! Then again, that probably was how Autobots worked: Utterly insane. Why should it just be his Optimus who enforced his vision on reality? "Mao."

I have not forgotten the fearsome and terrible death you deserve, Autobot scum, but his spine arched up under the touch. You shall not distract me from vengeance!

Nor that. String. Honestly. Did ht Autobot think he was this flighty? His big blue eyes darted, following the string. I shall not fall for such a pitiful rus--

*POUNCE*

[schrodingersbot]

Perceptor giggled softly, trailing the string along the tabletop, dragging it away from Fluffyscream's paws. He hadn't been expecting to be that amused by seeing the kitten pounce, but there was certainly a soothing effect disseminated by Fluffy.

He started to twitch and jerk and wiggle the twine to keep Fluffyscream's attention firmly fixated, forcing the kitten to scrabble and chase his inanimate prey.

[tattooed_jet]

I hate you, repugnant Autobot! Starscream thought as he scrambled after the twine, his paws drawn almost magnetically to the wiggling string.

He stops, bending low, giving a bracing wiggle to his hindquarters, before he jumps, all four paws landing squarely on the string, halting its movement.

HA! he said, tipping his kitteny chin with triumph. I have defeated you and your puny weapon.

"prrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr."

[schrodingersbot]

Chuckling, Perceptor conceded his defeat, releasing the string to the tiny terror's paws. He reached out and stroked a finger over Fluffyscream's back again, admiring the plushness of the fur, and the way that purr seemed to vibrate the whole kitten's body.

It was the flicker of light off of a shiny beaker on another workbench that gave him the idea, though. Keeping that one fingertip moving, he carefully adjusted the power setting upon his scope, before activating the light cannon on the lowest setting, with an incredibly tiny aperture.

A brilliant, but harmless, dot of bright golden light appeared on the tabletop, not far from a certain kitten's paws.

It wiggled enticingly...

[tattooed_jet]

YIELD! Starscream yowled, shaking the bit of string, his spine bumping up under the touch. And provide me with a worthier oppon---

He pounced on the sudden flash of gold light, both paws splatting together, scrambling around as it seemed to elude his grasp.

Stay still so I may kill you!