i'm going crazy here!

[axidentlyinluv]

so now i'm going into like horrible depression. i cant believe taht i am honestly THIS depressed over a guy. well, i guess i can't really help it. i love him. i'd give ANYTHING to have him back. you name it. i miss him so much. it hurts like hell. i can't sleep, i'm always upset, i cry way too much, and i dont ever want to do anything but sit around and eat(wayyy too much lol) and think about scott. how gay is that. ughh... it just sucks. all i can think about is him and the time we spent together. how he'd come up to visit me at dance, or just stop by my house after work, even if it could only be for 5 minutes, just to see me. i think about how i'd fall asleep in his arms on my couch, while he played with my hair, and kissed me on the forehead...he'd hold me so tight and close. it was the most amazing feeling to be with him. it just doesnt seem fair. but life's not fair. i just dont know what to do anymore. i cry myself to sleep, because he's not there with me. i listen to music that he did, just to imagine him singing them to me. (even if he cant sing worth shit lol) but everything about him makes me so happy. but at the same time. it makes me so upset, because he's not mine anymore. i miss being his baby doll.

well... i have my sports banquet tonight for poms. i get my varsity letter tonight :) that's exciting. now i just need to get 300 dollars for a jacket to put it on haha

oh, i deleted my myspace today. it's gay now. sorry. i do have this and an email address if you wanna talk to me though...

hmm...well, i really dont know what else to write about right now, because there's only one thing on my mind.

text me tonight so i dont get too bored.
♥ sammi