Feeling blue
I feel blue.
Very blue
And as though a MAJOR change is coming, thought I can't say what. Maybe it's Jacob's impending surgery. Maybe it's the fact that I'm back at work. But my head is in a very strange place at the moment and I don't know what to think or feel. I'm sad and lonely and happy and scared all at the same time and I feel as though I could explode. I've got friends I love, friends I miss, people I could SHOOT (specially at work), and people I could hug. There seems to be nothing really stable right now.
I feel like I am losing touch with the one place online where I really felt like I belonged. Everyone there is so close, I feel as though I don't really have a place there anymore. I am strongly considering leaving. Why stay where you aren't needed? It feels like walking into a stranger's house.
OK, rant over.
Jacob is walking. I mean REALLY walking. He can stand up without any help, and he just totters away to whatever toy or TV or other thing that's off-limits that he wants to play with. I'm noticing that he favours his one eye a lot more these days. Hoping the hospital calls with a surgery date sooner rather than later. I have so many things I want him to experience, but he's going to need to have this surgery behind him for most of those things to happen. I'm thinking swimming lessons next spring. I'm going to wait another few months to start with the potty as well. We were thinking of putting him in a toddler bed come spring, but now are thinking we should wait at least until he's past his second birthday.
We've been lucky to have so many supportive, wonderful people around us in this crazy time. To them I say ... thank you. And God Bless you.
Very blue
And as though a MAJOR change is coming, thought I can't say what. Maybe it's Jacob's impending surgery. Maybe it's the fact that I'm back at work. But my head is in a very strange place at the moment and I don't know what to think or feel. I'm sad and lonely and happy and scared all at the same time and I feel as though I could explode. I've got friends I love, friends I miss, people I could SHOOT (specially at work), and people I could hug. There seems to be nothing really stable right now.
I feel like I am losing touch with the one place online where I really felt like I belonged. Everyone there is so close, I feel as though I don't really have a place there anymore. I am strongly considering leaving. Why stay where you aren't needed? It feels like walking into a stranger's house.
OK, rant over.
Jacob is walking. I mean REALLY walking. He can stand up without any help, and he just totters away to whatever toy or TV or other thing that's off-limits that he wants to play with. I'm noticing that he favours his one eye a lot more these days. Hoping the hospital calls with a surgery date sooner rather than later. I have so many things I want him to experience, but he's going to need to have this surgery behind him for most of those things to happen. I'm thinking swimming lessons next spring. I'm going to wait another few months to start with the potty as well. We were thinking of putting him in a toddler bed come spring, but now are thinking we should wait at least until he's past his second birthday.
We've been lucky to have so many supportive, wonderful people around us in this crazy time. To them I say ... thank you. And God Bless you.