(Untitled)

[awkwardthought]

I'm having one of those days.

I hate doing the dishes because my mind thinks the most odd things.

today I realized that california will always symbolize youth to me. and that is probably the prime reason I do not want to go back. I will have lydia, my friends will all be at school and/or work. I will be stuck at home in the stupid "flower room"...

Comments

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[drugged_up17]

I was totally following you up until, "it is almost 2008. I should be getting ready to graduate from berkley with a bachelors in journalism." Since when in the hell were you going to go to Berkley? even after you graduated high school you never planned to do that. If ANYTHING you were supposed to be graduating from Western Career College as a nurse. Where does this bachelors in journalism come in? Dude. Were you ever in journalism?! That class fucking BLEW BALLS. I HATED journalism. Being on the newspaper was the worst damn class I've ever had. To think that someone would want to do that for the rest of thier life just blows my mind. To think that you would want to do that as a career is just a joke. You would HATE HATE HATE that job. Seriously...

And although, I do SERIOUSLY agree with, "I am such a selfish bitch. it's sickening." and I'm happy you finally agree, but your life isn't over just because you have a child. Can you even imagine how Lydia would feel in a couple of years if she read this? Saying that she ruined your life without completly coming out and typing it?! Wow. I know I would feel like shit. And honestly it seems like you're once again blaming others. Dude, no one ruined your life. You choose to make it happen the way it did. It's not even ruined anyway. If you think your life is ruined I guess I better just slit my throat now because mine isn't even worth living. Jesus Christ. You make your own life and destiny. You're only 21. So are you just going to sit at home making babies for your last 40+ year of life? Is that why it's ruined? Or is it ruined because you have an awesome kid and a loving husband? Or is it ruined because that's a LOVELY excuse for you to just give up, not do anything and just laze around wasting the rest of your life?! Don't make excuses before you even try dude. If I can do what I'm doing, there is NO EXCUSE for why you can't do WAY WAY MORE with your life. You have WAY more financial and family backing to help you do WHATEVER you want. If you don't do anything with your life and you hate it and say it's ruined that fine, but just don't blame Lydia and don't blame Benji because if ANYTHING They saved your life. What would you be doing without them? Partying with your friends? Staying up late and coming back home to Curt's house? Not having a job cuz you hate people and hate to work? Where would you be without them?! Not even as close to as happy as you are right now. So if you think things are bad you should take a minute to think how SHITTY everything would be without them. You would be in a SERIOUS depression and wouldn't even care about school or a job or your future. The only reason you care about that stuff now is because you have that family... Seriously, if you haven't hugged them in the last 1o minutes you need to go up and give both of them a hug and thank them for saving your life, because that is the ONLY way I see my family.