(no subject)
i have a problem avoiding conversations and one on one situations. my anxiety or whatever the fuck you want to call it, is going to be the death of me. its literally consuming everything that i know. memory is shot. i think thats a major cause to this. and on top of that, i miss out on so many beautiful things because my hearing is also shot. it has always been like this. all my life. how can i grow up and mature? im forcing that upon myself to far too high extents. its a fucking war in here, let me tell you. i feel inferior to everyone. if i ever see a weaker human being than i, ill regain self-confidence. its so fucked up.